When In Doubt Just Say No

Nein, nein, nein, already. Nolympics in Hamburg, either.


As you can see up there, Hamburgers were too afraid that the Olympics they decided not to bid to host for yesterday would have brought more police brutality, more barbed wire fences, more school crossing cops escorting people to airports, more big nasty retro surveillance cameras and more US-Amerikan Yankee dollars coming out of the chimney of some Hamburger’s house in a really weird surrealistic fashion (causing particularly nasty air pollution, I assume?).

Put in that light I think it was the sound decision to make.

Let’s see, Munich said no, Berlin said no and now Hamburg says no. I think a pattern is starting to develop here. Boston, too, said no, of course (are there really that many Bostonians of German extraction?). What a minute. Has hosting the Olympics now become some new form of cruel and unusual punishment or something? Maybe we could get ISIS to put in a bid.

“Die Menschen sehen, dass es Sachen gibt, wo das Geld besser angelegt ist.”

German Of The Day: Aufklärungstornados

That means reconnaissance Tornadoes.


The Paris attacks brought changes: Germany has pledged “any form of support” to France in its fight against terrorism. Right now, it looks like the German military will deploy its Tornado reconnaissance jets…

Reconnaissance jets have already been used in international military missions, for example, in the Balkans and Afghanistan. There, up to six German Tornados supplied their NATO partners with information about Taliban positions. The pictures are taken with cameras attached to the fuselage of the fighter bombers. After the planes have completed their mission and landed, the film must be developed and analyzed, which takes some time, but the images have a much higher resolution and are much more detailed than other types of aerial photography.

Deutsche Fotos für den Luftkrieg der anderen

Stress Lady Back With A Vengeance

Just like she already was here and here and here and here. And here.


Jeepers. What took her so long this time? I mean, what with all of this refugee-terror-soccer-match-cancellation-stress going on around here these days.

But as it turns out, she and her German compatriots don’t seem to be all that stressed out about those kind of things, believe it or not (believe it).

The latest stress survey indicates, for instance, that about one quarter of all Germans are primarily stressed out about the kind of stress that they put themselves under. These are Germans stressed out about being , well, German, I guess you could say. Damn. I wouldn’t want to live under that kind of stress, either.

Some 19 percent are stressed out about not having enough money.

Around 15 percent need more sleep and early retirement, I assume, because having to work for a living is a really big stress factor for them.

And 14 percent are stressed out by not having enough time to do what they want to do. You know, like being more stressed out about stuff?

The Germans remaining, I assume, were not able to adequately stress through verbal communication just how stressed out they really, truly are.

Wie die GfK in einer am Mittwoch veröffentlichten Umfrage herausgefunden hat, stellt der Druck, den man sich selbst macht, die hauptsächliche Stress-Ursache bei den Deutschen dar.

German Of The Day: Getarnt

That means disguised. You know, like the three terrorists from Paris who presumably made their way through Europe disguised as refugees? Now it’s out that at least one of them traveled through Germany.


Take this guy here, Ahmad Almohammad, one of the three who blew themselves up in front of the Stade de France. The latest reports indicate that he was in Bavaria at the end of October.

Alarming? Not alarming enough if you watch the news here. Making a big deal out of something like this would only unsettle the public.

“Zu laufenden Ermittlungsverfahren erteilen wir keine Auskünfte.”

Speaking Of Heroes

Or the lack of them…

Ahmad Mansour

This guy seems to think there’s a lack of them, too. Ahmad Manour is a group manager at the Heroes Project in Berlin and a family counselor at Hayat, an advisory body for de-radicalization.

The degree of Islamist radicalization among the youth in Germany is underestimated. He chose the title “Generation Allah” for his recently published book because “I find that there is an incredible number of young people here who believe in things like conspiracy theories, harbor anti-Semitic thoughts and don’t think along democratic lines. The Islamic religion is the only thing they have that conveys identity for these young people.”

“It’s also important that in view of Islamic terror Muslims ask themselves how such a monster could come to life among us.”

Im politischen Raum sei eine “gewisse Planlosigkeit” im Umgang mit dem Problem erkennbar.

Die Mörder Sind Unter Uns

That’s an old post-World War II German movie called “The Murderers Are Among Us,” starring Hildegard Knef. It’s about Nazis in Germany after the war. You know, people with dark pasts and stuff like that?

Hildegard Knef

Meanwhile, in a completely unrelated story…

Germany’s top prosecutor is investigating whether an Algerian man detained at a refugee center last week knew in advance about the Paris attacks but failed to tell the authorities, officials said on Friday.

The guy apparently even has notes describing the attacks, but he’s not talking for some reason. Nor is this news story getting much air time on the German news waves for some reason. I guess things like this simply aren’t permitted to, well, actually happen, so why report them? I mean, it’s not like this guy has a dark past or anything. And dark futures don’t count.

Im Fall des Algeriers aus Arnsberg, der die Terror-Anschläge von Paris angekündigt haben soll, gibt es neue Entwicklungen: Der 39-Jährige soll Notizen über die Attentate versteckt haben, die nun gefunden worden sind.

Who Woke Up Insulation Nation?

Like how rude is that? Even if they’re only awake for a few minutes it’s still uncalled for.


* Germans long felt insulated after opposing 2003 Iraq war

* Germany-France soccer game was one of Paris targets

* Cancelled match this week brought threat closer to home

* Vice chancellor shuns war rhetoric favoured by Hollande

After years of feeling insulated from militant Islamist threats, Germans are worrying that they too could be subject to attacks like those suffered last week in Paris.

Ain’t no big deal, though. They’ll be back to sleep in no time, folks. War? What, me worry? The answer is always…

“Die ganz klare Antwort ist nein.”

Germany To Double Its Presence In Mali to 18 Men

Eager to help its neighbor France redistribute its military forces in the wake of the terrorist attacks on Paris, and keen to stay out of harm’s way while pretending to have a real military of its own, Germany has generously volunteered to increase the number of its already sizable forces presently stationed in Mali. Some sources close to the chicly coiffed head of the German war machine herself have even suggested that she may even actually double the number to a full 18 men (that’s a 1 and an 8). Personen (persons), I mean.


Meanwhile… Earlier on Tuesday, French President Francois Hollande said the French aircraft carrier Charles de Gaulle would head to the eastern Mediterranean offshore areas of Syria and Lebanon, instead of the Persian Gulf as previously announced, to support military operations against the Islamic State (IS) extremist group.

Die Bundeswehr beteiligt sich an der UN-Mission Minusma in Mali derzeit unterstützend mit neun Soldaten.

PS: When Germans say nein they mean nine, damn it.

German Of The Day: Bündnisfall

That means casus foederis in Latin. OK, OK, and that means a “case for the alliance.” The NATO alliance, that is. Article 5. And that’s the case we have in Paris right now.


The Islamic State just attacked us. This isn’t rocket science, folks.

The coordinated terror attacks across Paris that left more than 120 dead and hundreds wounded have prompted calls for global intervention from France’s allies against the Islamic State group, which took responsibility for the attacks. As world leaders decried the attacks as an “act of war” and international media trumpeted the arrival of World War III, security experts said Saturday a perfect storm could be brewing for an invocation of the NATO’s Article 5, the clause declaring an attack against one ally to be an attack against all.

“Das war ein Kriegsakt einer feindlichen Armee, des ‘Islamischen Staates,'” Wir befinden uns im Krieg mit dem ‘Islamischen Staat'”

Sweden… Austria… Germany?

I don’t want to be offenceve here Angie, but I think it’s time to pull the ripcord.


How Sweden, the most open country in the world, was overwhelmed by migrants…

Austria plans border fence to manage migrant flow…

Considering Germany Without Merkel.

The ongoing refugee crisis has overwhelmed Merkel. The German chancellor is famous for her ability to sense the direction of public opinion and adjust her policies accordingly. This time, though, many think she may have miscalculated. When asylum seekers began arriving en masse to Germany early this summer, Merkel promised that her country would receive them with open arms — and open borders. And Germans initially supported her decision, which they saw as an opportunity to show solidarity to those in need.

But as the influx of people grew, many Germans started to worry that their government had failed to assess the true magnitude of the crisis. Suddenly, Merkel was no longer the infallible leader who could do no wrong but an impulsive head of government who had put her country in danger. Some began to see the chancellor’s famous statement about refugees — “we can manage” — as proof that Berlin had lost control of the immigration problem.

Are we having a putsch yet?


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