German Of The Day: Finanzspritze

That means an injection of capital. And that’s Greek down there for “I got your injection of capital for you right here, pal.”

Greek

Germany and its allies turned up the pressure on Greece to accept their conditions to stay in the euro as the region’s top finance officials descended on Brussels to hammer out a deal.

“Germany, the Netherlands and others will be hard and they will insist that Greece pays back the solidarity shown by the member states by respecting the conditions. They’ve now reached a point where they will tell Greece ‘if you really want to leave, leave.’”

German Greenness Now A Recognized Disease

Just like practically everything else around here. It’s called Gefährliche Öko-Hysterie (Dangerous Eco-Hysteria or DEH) and has blossomed out to become one of the top Volkskrankheiten (collective, people’s diseases) in the country, although I couldn’t give you it’s official ranking on the official top-ten disease list because these top-ten diseases change every few minutes anyway.

Grün

The problem with German Greenness or DEH is not so much that everyone in Germany has swallowed what the green shirts have been feeding them for decades. Hook, line and sinker, I mean. The problem here arises when the Widersprüche (contradictions) of green shirt ideology begin popping up their ugly little pointed heads. And they do this all the time, if you just look a little closer. Here are just a few such contradictory symptoms that might catch your attention:

“Are energy-saving lamps environmentally friendly if they contain poisonous mercury? Is organic farming truly ecological if twice as much land is needed for the same harvest? Are wind power plants environmentally friendly if they hack thousands of birds and bats to pieces? What effects does biodiesel have on nature if it comes from palm oil and rainforests have to be burned down to cultivate that? Why aren’t German friends of the sun concerned that Chinese solar cell factories pollute the environment and poison people?”

Try as they might, the Germans, green as they may claim to be, nevertheless have no choice but to start thinking about such contradictions from time to time and these contradictions can cause intense innere Spannung (inner tension) and Aufruhr (turmoil). They wonder if maybe the green regime isn’t what it claims to be after all. Some have even begun listening and watching Feindsender (enemy radio stations, TV and Internet sites), although this is strictly forbidden, of course. One or two have even organized Widerstand (resistance groups). Of course I’m just speculating here about the one or two organizing Widerstand but you must admit that it is at least theoretically possible.

Anyways, I want all of you to take two green aspirin and call me in the morning. Better yet, take two green aspirin and go away. Go off to Valhalla or Waldhalla or wherever it is you greens go to when you fade away, which will never be fast enough for me. You dangerously eco-hysterical sickos, you.

Alle sind grün geworden, von Angela Merkel bis Margot Käßmann, von “Bild” bis “Brigitte”, von der Allianz bis zum ADAC. Sogar McDonald’s hat sein Logo von rot auf grün umgefärbt. Gleichzeitig wird immer verschwommener, für was die Etiketten “grün” oder “nachhaltig” überhaupt noch stehen.

More Massive Military Might

As if we hadn’t already seen enough yesterday

A German battalion assigned to Nato’s rapid response force used broomstick handles instead of guns on a joint exercise due to chronic equipment shortages.

Broomsticks

Oh, I dunno. Maybe this is just part of Germany’s new security strategy. I mean, if they really know how to use these broomstick handles properly and stuff?

“Sure you can manage that broom, Potter?” said a cold, drawling voice.

Russia Triggering Massive German Military Shift Or Something

Defense Minister Ursula von der Leyen has said that she has had it up to here with Russia’s use of unconventional military force to exploit its dominance over former Soviet states and sees no other choice but to begin threatening Russia with Germany’s massive military might or something. In the future sometime perhaps, that is. Maybe.

Ursula

She has even gone so far as to begin plans for the publication of a so-called “white book” as early as next year. Or the year after, these things take time. The Russian military was not immediately available for comment as they were completely out of breath with shock and awe upon hearing this.

What is our reaction to the attempt to establish a geopolitical projection of power through military violence as a form of influence?” she asked no one in particular. “How do I know? I’m just the Defense Minister of Germany. But it’s bound to be in that white book and I just can’t wait to read what it will be.”

Duplicitous Doll Disses Deso Dogg (Da Dope)

Talk about your sleeper cell. That smooth-ISIS-rapping womanizer Deso Dog, aka Denis Da Dogg himself, just fell for the oldest trick in the How-to-Spy-101-for-Dummies book and married an FBI operative who just slipped off to Turkey only to be turned over to those caring folks at the FBI in the US-Amerika itself. Mata Hari

But not before she had transmitted tons of way cool information to them about the romantic rapping sap. Like how he throws down his rhymes half-naked in front of the bathroom mirror, I suppose. And what kind of top secret plans he and his ISIS buddies have been working on these days. You know, stuff like that. Dumbass.

Der ISIS-Kämpfer (39) in Syrien war in die Liebesfalle einer Undercover-Agentin getappt. Sie sollte eine enge Beziehung zu ihm aufbauen, um auf diese Weise wichtige Informationen über die Terrortruppe abzuschöpfen.

And That Little Girl’s Not Wearing Her Head-Thingy, Either

Officially banned from filmmaking in Iran since 2010, Iranian director Jafar Panahi’s third film since then, Taxi, just won the Golden Bear at the 65th Berlin Film Festival.

Taxi

Iranian creative folks still officially allowed to work in Iran are now petitioning their government to officially ban their work, too. Unfortunately, however, the head Islamically-correct-artistic-expression-mullah-what’s-in-charge said nichts da (nothing doing) when reached for comment, as “official bans like ours don’t just grow on trees, you know. And besides, if we officially banned everything then our official bans would not be nearly as effective as they have been up until now. And that’s official,” the official said.

“Limitations often inspire filmmakers to storytellers to make better work.”

German Of The Day: Die Befriedigung Voyeuristischer Bedürfnisse

That means the satisfaction of voyeuristic needs. And that is not, this guy here below repeats, NOT what his possible participation in the upcoming reality-show-media-spectacle “Mars One” on RTL is going to be about.

Mars One

Well not for him, perhaps. He says he just wants to make the world a better place. On Mars (he’s young – and has an SPD party membership book). And of the 200,000 people who have applied to take part in this cosmic kamikaze picnic he has made it all the way up to the last 660 future contestants batch. You know, he’s still being casted like they do on Germany’s Next Topmodel by Heidi Klum? His mom must be really proud.

You see, the planned “Mars One” mission will need lots and lots of dough to properly sponsor, I mean send their crews to their deaths and that’s why the TV rights have already been sold to the Dutch production firm Endemol, the same folks who bring us, I mean you, shows like Big Brother. So I guess we know where this is going – other than to Mars, I mean – but it has nothing whatsoever to do with the satisfaction of voyeuristic needs, to come full circle again already. No, it clearly doesn’t. It’s just about a simple suicide mission to Mars. Nothing more, nothing less.

Hey, I’m all for the exploration of Mars. But a one-way ticket there for human beings in reality show format is, well, as one guy in the article rightly points out, “ethically questionable” to say the least.

Es geht nicht um die Befriedigung voyeuristischer Bedürfnisse.

The Connection Has Timed Out

Here’s a German article I read earlier this afternoon entitled: 70 Years after the Dresden Bombing – “The myth began while the ruins were still burning.”

Timed out

Strange that it won’t open right now. Strange because, well, this German researcher who was interviewed in it says, in essence, that what most of us associate with the bombing of Dresden is actually nazi propaganda that was then also instrumentalized by the communists during the Cold War.

Yes, the killing of 25,000 people was a terrible thing. He then points out that 35,000 died in Hamburg (he forgot to mention the 40,000 in London), however. He also points out that the allied attack was an attack on a military target and not one of vengeance, as opposed to what we are all supposed to believe. The Dresden bombing is just another great myth that no one can properly approach here, in other words, nazi/communist propaganda that we are still hearing to this very day.

An interesting point of view but clearly one that some people out there don’t want us to hear, I mean read. Eerie, don’t you think? Try again later at: http://www.sueddeutsche.de/politik/jahre-bombardierung-von-dresden-der-mythos-entstand-noch-in-den-rauchenden-truemmern-1.2347466

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