This is getting a little frightening or something. Mysterious monoliths keep erecting themselves all over the place these days.

And now, in Germany itself, an odd Bavarian mystery monolith resembling a large, I dunno, mushroom or something has even inexplicably vanished into thin air! Like, I dunno, a limp zeppelin, or something along those lines. One German monolith expert has confirmed that the woodie, that is wooden statue simply vanished one morningwood, that is morning and that personally, he was still in a mild state of shock because this type of thing had never happened to him before, he swore. Honest.

German police have opened an investigation into the disappearance of a large wooden sculpture of a phallus from a mountainside where it appeared without explanation several years ago.