And no, this isn’t satire.
Row over weight of half a loaf leaves German baker with €15,000 bill – A customer complaint over just 10 grams of missing bread forced the Bavarian baker to install new weighing equipment across his shops.
The punch line: German politicians can’t seem to figure out why companies aren’t willing to invest in Germany anymore.
OK. But they should at least be able to speak the language.
Berlin police struggle to find German-speaking recruits – Berlin is struggling to recruit enough police officers because applicants are unable to speak German, according to the force’s president.
Barbara Slowik Meisel revealed that 40 per cent of applicants failed a German language skills test.
Ms Slowik Meisel said the trend, driven by increasing numbers of migrant applications, had created a dilemma for the Berlin police department: it cannot lower its standards but also urgently needs officers.
That Germany would allow driverless rides before the year 2060.
Waymo to launch driverless rides in Germany in 2027, entering third market outside U.S. – Alphabet’s Waymo on Tuesday said it plans to roll out robotaxi rides in Germany in 2027, marking its third international market and first in the EU.
Waymo will start “phased” testing in Munich over the next few weeks, with plans to launch to the public at the end of next year, the company said in a blog post. The testing aims to build high-definition street maps, train autonomous specialists and adapt software to the city’s “distinct driving conditions.”
When their origin is well-known.
Third drone and suspected military explosives found near Leipzig airport – Local media report discovery by German investigators after attempted attack on cargo and military logistics hub.
German investigators uncovered a third drone and suspected military explosives thought to be connected to an attempted attack on Leipzig airport, local media have reported.
The drone was discovered in Kabelsketal, just to the west of the airport, along with about 50g (1.8oz) of a suspected military explosive on 14 August, 10 days after the unsuccessful sabotage. Leipzig airport is a cargo and military logistics hub used by Nato and Ukraine’s Antonov Airlines for transporting military supplies.
The office of the prosecutor general, which is leading the investigation, declined to comment on Tuesday. But the German chancellor, Friedrich Merz, said the government would soon provide information about who it believed was behind the drone attacks.
It’s the little unsavoury details that make a big unsavoury difference.
Germany’s Nord Stream grudge – The looming trial could undermine support for Ukraine…
The first of the Nord Stream criminal trials will start on 26 October in Hamburg. It will expose many unsavoury details. The prosecutors might ask questions such as: who ordered the attacks? What did President Volodymyr Zelensky know? When did he know it? The attack left Germany in a perma-energy crisis.
That means long-range or deep-strike missiles.
Inside Germany’s roughly $14 billion plan to deter Russia with a new arsenal of deep-strike missiles – The German government expects it will need almost €12 billion — roughly $14 billion — to build a new arsenal of long-range weapons aimed at deterring Russia.
The weapons would give German forces the ability to hit military targets hundreds or even thousands of kilometers behind the front — including command centers, airfields, missile launchers, and supply hubs.
Internal documents call the effort a top priority for both Germany and NATO.
That means Berlin was yesterday.
Germany news: Berlin losing its appeal for many Germans – Fewer than a third of Germans find their capital city “fascinating”, a sharp fall from 20 years ago, a survey has found.
More Germans think Berlin ‘lacks charisma’ than those who find it ‘fascinating,’ according to a survey.
That means secret weapons depot.
Secret Weapons Depot Discovered Near Berlin – According to reports from WDR, NDR, and SZ, security authorities have discovered a hideout containing two loaded weapons on the outskirts of Berlin. Authorities believe it was a depot used by Russian agents for potential attacks.
It must have been like a scene from a spy thriller when German officials made an explosive discovery in late summer of last year in a wooded area on the state border between Brandenburg and Berlin. According to reports from WDR, NDR, and the Süddeutsche Zeitung (SZ), they found a professionally constructed hideout containing two loaded firearms in the capital’s affluent suburban belt.
That’s easy. Wind = wind. Hose = pants. So if you put the two together you get…
Tornado!
Germany news: Powerful storms damage homes, leave 1 dead – Germany is grappling with the impacts of damaging storms after a prolonged dry spell.
Cashes in on being Germany’s most dangerous politician.
Election Campaign Hype on eBay: 1,000 Euros for a Siegmund Autograph on the “Spiegel” Cover – Election-campaign frenzy at the online auction site eBay! There, a private seller sold an autograph by AfD lead candidate Ulrich Siegmund (35) for the state election (September 6) in Saxony-Anhalt on an issue of Der Spiegel titled “Germany’s Most Dangerous Man.” Highest bid: 1,010 euros!
A total of 43 bids were placed. In the listing, the seller assured buyers: “You are bidding on an original, hand-signed (not a copy or print) autograph by Ulrich Siegmund on a Spiegel issue. I hope you enjoy bidding!” Beneath the AfD politician’s signature is the date from last Saturday (August 15, 26).
Observing Hermann 