German Of The Day: Moralkeule

That means moral club. No, not the kind you join. The kind you wack folks with.

Moral Club

“The ugly German doesn’t wear a steel helmet anymore – he gives the world moral instruction. When a German captain goes to court in Italy the German public opinion (the “folk’s soul”) seethes. Even President Steinmeier disregards international law and grabs the moral club.”

To understand many of the odd views that Germans hold you must understand that Germany is a moral superpower, or at least that’s how Germans behave. Like liberals everywhere, German activists are forever calling on a higher legitimization to justify actions that undermine the rule of law – in this case in another country (how convenient). An activist captain who defied the Italian government’s ban and docked at Lampedusa with forty refugees on board has now become a German folk hero (for fifteen minutes at least).

It appears that when you’re a German moral superman, idealism gives you the morally superior superhero right to break the law for the greater good (sounds vaguely familiar). Just what that greater good is you decide yourself.

Oddly, in this particular case, the heroic types in the limelight never get around to suggesting that the refugees in question be shipped directly to Germany instead. Why doesn’t Germany just airlift them directly to Berlin and bypass Italy altogether? Turn your moral clubs into plowshares already, folks.

Wenn eine deutsche Kapitänin in Italien vor Gericht gestellt wird, beginnt die Volksseele zu kochen. Selbst Bundespräsident Steinmeier vergisst dann das Völkerrecht und greift zur Moralkeule.

 

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Saving The Planet The Convenient Way

Lord knows that “saving the planet” from climate change is hard work.

Planet

That is why so many Germans are so “conscientious about the purchases they make, ride bikes and try to reduce their trash and carbon footprint.” They are also perfectly aware of the fact that they “can’t solve the problem on their own,” which us very, well, convenient but “they can force politicians and businesses to act,” which they do, if it isn’t all too inconvenient, that is.

And all of this gives them a good conscience, which is good. A good conscience one must have when one is riddled with guilt. A good conscience one must have when one is driving one’s expensive German non-electric automobile down the autobahn at excessive speeds, for example, or purchasing goods and products grown or manufactured on the other side of the planet being saved and flown in to Germany at dumping prices. A good conscience one must have when one simultaneously exports one’s plastic waste to the other side of the planet while flying off on vacation three times a year to culturally exchange with other cultures about the virtues of saving said planet.

Good conscience and convenience go hand in hand here, in other words. Here, too, Germany is a forerunner and we should look up to their shining example with admiration and humility.

“Sustainability is becoming a ‘quasi-religious’ promise of salvation.”

So She Has To Retire Now, Right?

Isn’t that mandatory or something in Germany when you turn sixty-five? Well, it ought to be. Just sayin’.

Merkel

Angela Merkel is 65 today but she’s far from the oldest world leader – Shock ages revealed…

The oldest current serving world leader is Prime Minister of Malaysia Mahathir Mohamad, who is 94-years-old and assumed office in 2018.

He is followed by Queen Elizabeth II, who celebrated her 93rd birthday in April.

German Of The Day: Bußgeld

No, that doesn’t mean bus money. It means fine or penalty.

Fine

And that’s what the parents of the kids who have been taking part in Joan of Arc’s, I mean, Greta Thunberg’s wackedelic Fridays for Future (FFF) demonstrations will now have to be paying. At least here in Germany.

German school authorities are starting to get tired of all the truancy going on or something and have begun handing out fines starting at 88.50 euros a pop. Jeepers. That might get FFF-freakin’ expensive before too long, folks.

Eltern von Klimaschutzdemonstranten müssen Bußgeld bezahlen – Seit Monaten demonstriert Fridays for Future für besseren Klimaschutz. Weil das auch während der Schulzeit geschieht, wird in Mannheim das Ordnungsamt aktiv.

Mein Kampf-Karrenbauer

I mean Mein Kramp-Karrenbauer, of course. But she is a Kampf-Karrenbauer now, you know.

AKK

Or you can just call her AKK, if you prefer, although that sounds like a machine gun, too. Or just call her Mini-Merkel if you like that better (that’s her official unofficial designation). But I dunno. Mini-Merkel just doesn’t have the punch a defense minister needs to have with his name, don’t you think? Especially when it’s a she. Again. It just doesn’t exude any shock and awe. Well, shock, maybe, but nothing this government does can awe me anymore.

Merkel protege AKK given defence job seen as poisoned chalice – Annegret Kramp-Karrenbauer succeeds new EU commission president Ursula von der Leyen as German defence minister.

Angela Merkel’s favoured successor as chancellor has been appointed Germany’s new defence minister in an unexpected and potentially risky move after Ursula von der Leyen’s confirmation as European commission president…

The job of defence minister is widely seen as a poisoned chalice. Germany’s armed forces, which critics maintain have long been chronically underfunded, are consistently accused of inefficiency and of having inadequate or defective equipment.

“The World Is Crying For More Europe”

That’s odd. I live here and I can’t here a damned thing.

Ursula

Ursula von der Leyen asks MEPs to back her as first female European commission president- Ursula von der Leyen has championed gender equality in her appeal to MEPs to back her as the first female president of the European commission, telling the European parliament: “We represent half of our population. We want our fair share.”

In a related matter, please take part in this important survey.

“Die Welt schreit nach mehr Europa.”

Of Course She’s Inadequate

If she were adequate they wouldn’t have nominated her for the job in the first place.

Inadequate

That’s how the EU works.

EU crisis: Merkel’s coalition ally slams Ursula von der Leyen for EU chief ‘inadequate!’ – The European Parliament is due to vote next Tuesday on whether Ms von der Leyen, Germany’s defence minister and a conservative ally of Chancellor Angela Merkel, should succeed Jean-Claude Juncker as head of the EU. Ms Von der Leyen’s nomination by EU leaders has infuriated the Social Democrats (SPD), Mrs Merkel’s coalition partners, who have accused leaders of ignoring the lead candidates from the main parliamentary blocs in their horse-trading over top posts…

The SPD said of her efforts to fix gaps in military readiness, Ms von der Leyen had failed to make significant improvements and that the Bundeswehr was still “in a shabby state”.

Slow Learners

The Good Germans still haven’t figured it out.

Heiko

Although this became loud and clear as a bell very quickly after Angela Merkel opened up the floodgates back in 2015, many German Gutmenesch (do-gooder) politicians still believe they can convince leaders in other European countries to help them establish a “fair” distribution system for the asylum seekers who Germany unfairly invited to Europe.

More dream world thinking, in other words. Personally, I think the fairest solution would be to fly all would-be asylum seekers wishing to come to Europe directly to Germany, Berlin Airlift style.

German foreign minister calls for alliance of EU countries to take in migrants – Berlin is willing ‘to make a substantial contribution,’ says Heiko Maas…

His proposal was immediately rejected by Austria’s former and possibly future chancellor, Sebastian Kurz. Kurz, who is running to regain the chancellorship in September, described quotas as an outdated idea and declared that “the distribution of migrants across Europe has failed,” in a statement Saturday reported by dpa.