Category Archives: Habitudes
When a country turns bad
Or makes a bad turn, I should say.
“The ink had barely dried after GM signed Opel over to Canadian car parts maker Magna and Russia’s Sberbank when they announced they would fire one-fifth of the group’s 50,000 European employees within a year – 4,000 in Germany.”
“Even a strong recovery would leave automakers with huge overcapacity. Against this background – which the sale of Opel does nothing to change – not admitting the necessity of job cuts is either delusional or dishonest to voters.”
“So when Germany’s government put up €4.5bn in loans and guarantees to ensure that Magna prevailed in GM’s garage sale, it presumably expected to get something in return.”
And that was…
“Magna co-chief executive Siegfried Wolf’s assurance that restructuring will be guided purely by commercial considerations is laughable when the group is accepting financing that depends on political decisions. The German money is a move in a negative-sum game of trying to push job cuts across the border.”
“We are naturally determined to resolve the remaining problems in a spirit of European equality.”
How many times now?
They’ve been European Championship champions for five years in a row now. They’ve won 35 consecutive Euro matches in the process.
And if you look hard enough, you might even find a few people (men people?) here in Germany who actually care.
“We played well in patches but credit to Germany, they were very clinical.”
Show Your Colors on Sylt
Time to say goodbye
From Afghanistan, for Germany, right before the coming German general election, get it?
“Although the issue has so far not played a big part in the run-up to Germany’s September 27 federal election, polls show most voters want the 4,200 German troops in Afghanistan as part of a six-year-old NATO mission to return home.”
“Geman Foreign Minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier, a member of the Social Democrats (SPD) who share power with Merkel’s conservatives, said once it became clear who would lead Afghanistan after last Thursday’s election there, talks should begin over how long foreign troops should stay.”
And he didn’t say it with any desperation in his voice either, honest.
“We need to agree with the new Afghan president…how long international troops should remain in Afghanistan.”
This is not a crocodile
I don’t know what it is, but Germans are doggedly determined to find crocodiles in their lakes, rivers and streams. Crocodiles that aren’t there, I mean. This time, two girls in Bavaria saw one (not) and got the country’s crocodile hunters (professional and otherwise) all tied up in a knot for a few minutes of non-fame.
The last crocodile that wasn’t one turned out to be a turtle. The one before that was probably a bottle of corn schnapps. And the one before that…
Okay, so you’ve had your little Sommerloch (silly summer season) scare again (not). It’s time to go back to school and/or work again or something already.
„Die Beamten gehen nun aber davon aus, dass es ein Biber oder auch ein größerer Fisch war, der die Mädchen erschreckte.“
And speak no evil
Do you believe there could be an election campaign held in your country in which the word Afghanistan is not even mentioned (much less the word war), although four thousand of your troops are stationed there (four thousand is considered to be a lot over here)? The Germans can pull that one off in their sleep.
After all, there are more pressing issues (see below).
Being big fans of semantic exercises, especially when it comes confronting evidence that upsets their sometimes rather dreamlike view of the world (in this case the evidence being that building schools won’t stop the Taliban, bullets will), German politicians on both sides of the grand coalition line are dutifully hiding their heads in the sand when it comes to this non-subject, at least until the coming general election is over, at which point the winners will continue to hide their heads in the sand some more.
“Germans have this pacifist world view whereby most problems can be solved through dialogue, aid, compromise and not by force.”
Pay up or shut up
Or can we pay up and keep on yakking? Everyone is relieved, as usual. Especially the pirates who just took in $2.7 million for the German freighter they seized in the Indian Ocean.
Foreign Minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier of Germany said it was “with great relief’’ that that he learned of the ship’s release. Chancellor Angela Merkel was also “happy and relieved,’’ it is reported. And one of the relieved pirates is also said to have said that “We are now dividing the money and we shall get off the ship soon,” with great relief already.
British Royal Navy Commander John Harbour said the EU did not get involved in ransom deals and he could not confirm reports that $2.7 million had been paid.
Where have all the beer drinkers gone?
Wo sind sie geblieben? Old people. They just don’t drink beer like they used to, the Germans.
Sales are down 4.5 percent, apparently because most classic beer drinkers are between the ages of 18 and 45. And being that the population in Germany is aging and all that, well, beer consumption here is going down the drain, so-to-speak. Wie war Deutschland or something.
“Was ist los mit der Bier-Nation Deutschland?”
Scientific breakthrough found in combat against German Lounger Stress Disorder
Well, it isn’t all that scientific really. But it is a step forward in the ongoing battle against GLSD. European vacation specialists seem to have finally come up with an antidote to the dreaded early morning German vacationer ritual of draping a beach towel over the first vacant sun lounger he or she can find (some call it “bed bagging bingo”). But, then again, maybe they haven’t.
Thomas Cook is now giving Germans, genetically programmed as they are to reserve deckchairs wherever and whenever they find them, the option of pre-booking their loungers long before they ever even get to there, wherever that is. On vacation, I mean. Whether or not this will put an end to the long-running beach towel wars between Germany and the rest of the world as we know it remains to be seen of course. So stay tuned or something.
„So far, the offer only applies to winter holidays booked in Germany.“
Observing Hermann 