A Large City Every Year

The head of Germany’s Federal Office for Migration and Refugees, Hans-Eckhard Sommer, is in hot water now.

City

He claims that the amount of asylum seekers still being allowed to enter Germany is “too high” (162,000 last year) and compares this to “a large city coming to us every year.”

Worse still, he makes the ridiculous allegation that “the state can only handle so much” and then has the cheek to critisize the fact that over half of those seeking asylum (54 percent) still don’t have the decency to carry any identification papers with them.

What a monster or something. He should be relieved of his job immediately.

„EINE GROSSSTADT, DIE JÄHRLICH ZU UNS KOMMT”

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German Of The Day: Sollte, Müsste, Könnte, Würde…

These are examples of the infamous German Konjunktiv or conjunctive mood. They mean, in essence, should, ought to, could, would but… It ain’t gonna happen.

Spending

Take this example here: Why Germany Should Further Boost Defense Spending, and Why It Probably Won’t. Of course, the Germans know that they should, ought to, could, would spend more on defense but they just won’t because… It ain’t gonna happen. This grammatical subtlety has always worked nicely in the past, whether they were in a conjunctive mood or not. So, hey. Never touch a running system.

The United States is bristling at the suggestion Germany might miss its own defense spending target, which is already short of the NATO goal, prompting comments from officials, including U.S. Ambassador to Germany Richard Grenell.

NATO countries have pledged to move toward spending 2 percent of GDP on defense and Chancellor Angela Merkel’s government had pledged to increase spending to 1.5 percent by 2024. Last year, at the NATO summit in Brussels, Trump criticized Germany’s contribution to the NATO and Merkel countered that the European country is the organization’s “second largest providers of troops,” according to The Guardian.

“NATO members clearly pledged to move towards, not away, from 2 percent by 2024. That the German government would even be considering reducing its already unacceptable commitments to military readiness is a worrisome signal to Germany’s 28 NATO Allies.”

Like Rats Leaving A Sinking Ship

Only the ship already sank and the rats are all wet. In more ways than one.

Rats

Sometimes you’ve got to lose in life to get ahead. Like three times in a row. As did the SPD‘s top candidate for the elections in Hesse, Thorsten Schäfer-Gümbel, before landing this way cool cushy job as Personalvorstand bei der staatseigenen Gesellschaft für internationale Zusammenarbeit (GiZ) – the Human Resources Director at the State-Owned Company for International Cooperation – yesterday. For 200,000 euros a year.

Now that’s the kind of Social Democracy I can live with, pal. And hey; without losers, where would the winners be?

KÜNFTIG RUND 200 000 EURO JAHRESGEHALT FÜR PARTEI-VIZE SCHÄFER-GÜMBEL. Spitzenjob als Belohnung für SPD-Wahlverlierer!

Reality Can Be A Bitch Like That

After Missing Emissions Targets, Germany Creates Climate Watchdog.

Climate

Brilliant, really. First you shut down all your nuclear power plants, build more coal-firing power plants to compensate for them (renewable energy isn’t enough here for some odd reason) and then fail to meet the ridiculously ambitious emissions reduction goals you have set.

Then, once you’ve finally come clean about not being able to come clean, you “set up a ‘climate cabinet’ to coordinate emissions reduction efforts and ensure politicians (you, that is) keep their promises.”

I thought Kafka was dead. Come on, now. Did he write this?

Environment minister Svenja Schulze (SPD) detailed the plan to create a ministerial group to German newspaper Tageszeitung on Saturday, saying it would ensure that ideas to lower the country’s emissions don’t slip through the cracks.

On Course, Of Course

Don’t anyone ever tell you that Germans aren’t reliable.

Bundeswehr

As noted yesterday, the equipment used by the German army is still as inadequate as ever, despite repeated promises by the German defense minister to make improvements.

And now, despite claims by the German government to one day reach the official NATO target of 2 per cent GDP on defense spending it agreed to years ago, it won’t even be able to make the 1.5 percent it set for itself by 2024. This is “round,” as the Germans say. It all fits like a glove.

Germany is on course to miss its self-declared target for defence spending in a development that threatens to trigger a new row with the US and raises further questions over Berlin’s military contribution to Nato.

The government of Angela Merkel agreed last year to raise the German military budget to 1.5 per cent of gross domestic product by 2024 — a marked increase but still short of the official Nato target of 2 per cent. 

But the 1.5 per cent target is now under threat after Olaf Scholz, the Social Democrat (SPD) finance minister, rebuffed plans for an ambitious increase in military spending in the years ahead, citing a worsening economic outlook.

Secret Report Not Much Of A Secret

It was just leaked, as secret reports so often are, and now it’s come out that – get this – the Bundeswehr’s equipment is still inadequate.

Tiger

Yawn. Been there, done that. Top inadequacies this time? Of the Bundeswehr’s 53 Tiger combat helicopters only 11.6 of them are operational (they would never get me in that .6 one). With the NH90 transport helicopter it’s 17.5 from 71 and only 15.9 of the 71 CH-53 transport helicopters are ready for combat.

But not to worry (as if anybody is). German Defense Minister Ursula von der Leyen promised a “turnaround” in the Bundeswehr’s equipment department – a year or two or three ago. Other defense menisters would have been fired for this long ago, of course, but 1) she’s a girl and 2) she’s one of Angie Merkel’s bosom buddies.

Die Ausstattung der Bundeswehr ist laut einem Zeitungsbericht weiterhin mangelhaft. Das zeige der neueste, als geheim eingestufte “Bericht zur Materiallage der Hauptwaffensysteme der Bundeswehr”, schreibt die “Welt am Sonntag”.

Ali B. Vs. Susanna F.

Susanna F already lost before the trial began.

Ali

An Iraqi man went on trial in Germany on Tuesday (Mar 12) accused of the rape and murder of a teenage girl that inflamed anti-immigrant tensions amid a mass influx of asylum seekers.

The accused, Ali Bashar, 22, left Germany for northern Iraq shortly after the May 2018 crime but was arrested and brought back in a mission joined personally by Germany’s federal police chief.

Everything just went black,” he says. Yes, it did. Right around 2015. This is all so unnecessary. Shouldn’t Angela Merkel be called to the witness stand for more clarification?

Ali B. gesteht Tötung von Susanna F.

Number Four Has Issues

But it doesn’t really make much sense, does it?

Four

How can the world’s fourth largest exporter of arms (don’t worry, they’ll be back up at third place again in no time) have “issues with readiness of submarines, aircraft” for its own army? Year in and year out, I mean. One could almost think it’s intentional.

The readiness of Germany’s weapons systems stood at about 70 percent in 2018 overall, but its submarines, heavy-lift helicopters and Tornado fighter jets faced continued challenges, the German Defence Ministry told lawmakers on Monday.

Germany is the fourth largest arms exporter in the world, according to a report released by the Stockholm Peace Research Institute on Monday.

We Need Professional Counseling

Not. Same old same old, if you ask me: Germans see ties worsening as Americans remain positive.

Pew

In the U.S., seven-in-ten say that relations with Germany are good, a sentiment that has not changed much in the past year. Germans, on the other hand, are much more negative: 73% say that relations with the U.S. are bad, a 17-percentage-point increase since 2017.

Americans want more cooperation with Germany, but Germans don’t reciprocate.

But The Next Time ISIS Starts A War…

Watch out! Dual-nationals who fight for them will lose their German citizenship!

ISIS

This is how Germany kind of sort of works. It’s always too little, too late and heartfelt half-ass. And then everybody congratulates one another for having reached a compromise. It would be funny as hell if it weren’t so sad.

Germany is to introduce new legislation to remove citizenship from dual-nationals who fight for the self-styled Islamic State (IS) and other terrorist groups.

To date, German nationals could only have their citizenship stripped if they joined foreign armed forces without the government’s permission. Now the German government has decided to extend the legislation to cover German citizens who travel to fight on behalf of a terror militia.

Meanwhile, in Syria… “The United States is asking Britain, France, Germany and other European allies to take back over 800 Isis fighters that we captured in Syria and put them on trial. The Caliphate is ready to fall. The alternative is not a good one in that we will be forced to release them.” 

Needless to say, the Germans don’t want them. Nor do they wish to try them. Is Guantanamo still in operation?

So ein Sinnlos-Gesetz kann sich wirklich nur die GroKo ausdenken.