In an embarrassing embarrassment following Wikileaks’ leak of leaked US despatches, US diplomats in Germany have been caught making the very same derisive remarks about leading German politicians that Germany’s critical media makes.

Among other shocking revelations, it was revealed that US officials see Angela Merkel as being someone who “avoids risk,” Guido Westerwelle as being “arrogant” and Wolfgang Schäuble as being “an angry old man.”

“This is all just too embarassing to even describe,” said one anonymous high-level American diplomat wearing a brown paper bag over his head. “The leaking the leak part was bad enough, but to be caught red-handed like this expressing the very same views about German leaders that Germans themselves hold of them is just like, I dunno, I’m just so ashamed. And not worthy. But that’s not an official statement or anything. And turn that camera and mike off already, will ya?”