It’s Magic!

It’s as if none of this Corona crap ever happened at all!

Magic

Maybe that’s because none of this Corona crap ever did happen. Not like it was supposed to happen, I mean. Not that anybody ever really knew how it was supposed to happen but everybody knows now that it simply didn’t happen that way. Folks sure got riled up though, didn’t they?

Germany poised for big economic recovery – The German economy is expected to shrink by more than 6% this year. But a new study found the country could be in for a big economic recovery next year.

In a best-case scenario, the economy could recover in about five months, the institute said. This would result in a more mild economic slump of just 3.9% in 2020.

But in a worst-case scenario, the recovery could also take as long as 16 months. The economy could then shrink by 9.3% this year, with growth of 9.5% forecast for 2021.

“In that case, the recovery would stretch into 2022.”

German Of The Day: Warnhinweisen

That means warning signs. You know, like the kind Twitter now places on tweets made by the President of the United States?

Warnings

They don’t place any warning signs on anything German mainstream media puts out, unfortunately. They are still allowed to “disseminate any kind of nonsense with impunity.” Maybe that will come to an end one day too. Ha, ha, ha. Just joking. Maybe when monkeys start flying out of my butt. We all no that ain’t never gonna happen.

Up to now the US President could disseminate any kind of nonsense with impunity. For instance that postal voting and electoral fraud are the same thing. Those days might now be over.

Bislang konnte der US-Präsident auf Twitter ungestraft jeden Unsinn verbreiten. Zum Beispiel, dass Briefwahl und Wahlbetrug praktisch dasselbe seien. Diese Zeiten könnten jetzt vorbei sein.

If We’re Really Lucky, June Is Going To Suck

May was REALLY awful.

Exports

And we don’t even want to talk about June.

The mood among German exporters recovered somewhat in May after a “catastrophic” April, the first full month of coronavirus lockdown measures in Europe’s largest economy, the Ifo institute said on Tuesday.

“Virtually every sector still expects further declines, yet these will be less sharp than had been expected in the previous month,” the Munich think tank said in a monthly release.

The Ifo export indicator, based on a survey of around 2,300 manufacturing businesses, rose in May to -26.9 from -50.2. It is a net reading for respondents expecting an increase minus those who see a decline.

German Of The Day: Übersterblichkeit

That means higher mortality rate.

Dead

But you need to read in which context it is being used here to get the whole message: Nur geringe Übersterblichkeit – Todesfälle im April knapp über dem Schnitt. That is: Only a slightly higher mortality rate – The fatalities in April were just slightly above average.

My, that is odd, isn’t it? Wasn’t April the big Corona month in Germany? Just like everywhere else? And the country’s mortality rate was only slightly higher than usual? There must be a mistake here somewhere. Or were we all mislead to expect something else? Certainly not intentionally. Or was it just ineptitude? Numbers, black on white like that, can be very mysterious sometimes. Especially when they don’t fit your story line.

Im April sterben zwar mehr Menschen in Deutschland als im Durchschnitt – der Anstieg beträgt aber nur wenige Prozent.

Germans Not Sure Who They Can Spy On Anymore

They can’t hardly spy on Germans anymore, at home and abroad. With foreigners here it’s not much better. And now…

Spies

German intelligence can’t spy on foreigners outside Germany – Germany’s Constitutional Court ruled on Tuesday that monitoring the internet traffic of foreign nationals abroad by the BND intelligence agency partly breaches the constitution.

Sheesh. A lot of German spies are going to need therapy. And worst of all, it doesn’t really matter whether Germans do any spying or not, and they know it. Whenever anything real goes down the tip-offs always come from a “befreundeten Nachrichtendienst” (allied intelligence service) anyway. They never say who this service is because everybody already knows and they’d rather not talk about it.

“A secret service that wants to protect democracy cannot trample on important democratic freedoms.”

More Bad News

For the perennial doom-and-gloom folks in charge of what we are supposed to think – at least here in Germany.

Gloom

As if the popular uprising against the Coronavirus shutdown here wasn’t enough.

Bundesbank sees early signs of recovery in German economy – Central bank expects easing of lockdown to boost activity in Europe’s largest economy

“There is currently much to suggest that overall economic developments will move up again in the course of the second quarter as a result of the easing measures and a recovery is under way.”

Lockdown Or Lockup?

Take your pick, citizens.

Rules

You either shutdown voluntarily or we shut you down permanently.

Germans are people who wait until the light turns green before crossing the street. Even if nobody else is around. They are top of the class when it comes to following rules and regulations. They are very law-abiding people, in other words. But the Coronavirus – or the arbitrary and disproportionatly restrictive government actions being taken in response to the COVID-19 pandemic here in Germany – seems to have had a negative effect upon their normal behavioral patterns and they are now taking to the streets in protest. North, south, east and west. They are, in other words, mad as hell and aren’t going to take it anymore.

Proteste in vielen deutschen Städten – Tränengas und Festnahmen bei Corona-Demo in Hamburg.

German Of The Day: Geisterspiele

“Ghost games” are sporting matches, in this case football (soccer) matches, without spectators in the stadium. Games behind closed doors, in other words.

Geist

The German Bundesliga will pick up its season this weekend after a two-month break. No matter what happens now, the league is determined to finish.

The plan to put German soccer back on the field this weekend hinged on more moving parts than a Volkswagen. Clubs had to conduct more than 2,000 coronavirus tests. Chancellor Angela Merkel needed to give her blessing. The Bundesliga drew up a protocol to disinfect balls mid-game.

German Nuclear Power Plant Explodes

Just kidding. Hardy, har, har. Everybody knows Germans don’t have nuclear power plants anymore. Well, not many. One less now for sure.

Former German nuke plant towers demolished in morning blasts – The two cooling towers of a former nuclear power plant in southwestern Germany have been demolished in a pair of early-morning explosions whose timing was kept under wraps to prevent crowds from gathering during the coronavirus pandemic