And we all know that you know that we know how you know you’re gonna miss him. Check out this really, really funny, sophisticated and, uh, original video! It’s a scream or something.
„Entspannt, humorig und ohne jede Spur von Reue hat US-Präsident George W. Bush von den Journalisten im Weißen Haus Abschied genommen.“
Germany’s car industrial complex is slowly turning into more of a complex kind of a complex if you know what I’m sayin’ as demand for car sales has dropped to a twenty year low here, which isn’t all that very complex at all if you stop and think about it. Once considered to be about as invulnerable to economic fluctuations as the German car industry, the German car industry is now starting to look like the American one. Well no, it ain’t quite that ugly. But let’s just say der Lack ist ab (all the glamour, or paint, is gone, or at least going).
After several German car manufacturers decided to send thousands of their employees on a not so well-deserved five-week Kurzarbeit (reduced hours) Christmas break, which must have ruined a whole lot of otherwise quite stable marriages, the workers are now returning but a better market situation isn’t. Sales of BMW in evil US-Amerika, for instance, are over forty percent lower than they were a year ago. The Nightmare On Assembly Line Street continues, in other words. Freddy Krueger is a German name, by the way.
Why it’s getting so bad (how bad is it?), it’s getting so bad that German male men car executive types are now having to let themselves be lectured at like little school boys by a woman, of all people, about how to make cars, of all things, or at least how man (one) could make them. Angie wants them to be more “innovative” or something.
This is of course an impossible thing to ask however as Germans only know how to make race cars and this solar and battery stuff just isn’t sexy enough, at least not yet. And nuclear energy-powered cars would just be verboten out of hand so don’t even ask.
“Der Auftragsbestand liegt um elf Prozent unter dem Vorjahreswert und damit auf dem niedrigsten Niveau seit Ende der 80er Jahre.”
America, I mean. Well I had, technically. US-Amerika, that is. But I still am a real American, or “Amurikin” if you prefer, albeit a virtual one here. Anyways… German journalists of the smarter kind over at Die Zeit, concerned about what will become of us (as in US) (as in them) now that we’re going, going, gone, have asked Mr. End of History Francis Fukuyama himself like, what’s the deal? In other words, give us some appropriate inappropriate negative energy flow, pronto.
Here’s MY translation of an interview entitled “What comes after America?”
ZEIT: What DISTURBS you the most about the coming year?
Fuku-san: Duh. The financial crisis.
ZEIT: Will OBAMA save the world or is America TOAST?
Fuku-san: Toast? Don’t think so. Germany was toast once, so I understand where you’re coming from. But it’s not that the US has gotten weaker, it’s that other nations have become stronger.
ZEIT: First the Iraq DISASTER, now the Wall Street MELTDOWN. One might have hoped that America would have at least had its economy under control. Won’t this lead to a massive LOSS OF CONFIDENCE?
Fuku-san: We’re not worthy, we’re not worthy, blah, blah, blah. But being that you’ve never had any confidence in us anyway, like, who cares?
ZEIT: Strange how just yesterday state intervention was THE WORK OF THE DEVIL, now the government is supposed to save the economy. Has Amerika become UN-IDEOLOGICAL?
Fuku-san: There’s an ideology out there for any and every direction you take. But I don’t think I’d have the time to explain it to you.
ZEIT: But don’t THE REPUBLICANS want to return to the REAGAN YEARS of LOWER TAXES and LESS STATE CONTROL?
Fuku-san: Those were the days, weren’t they? Unfortunately, less state intervention is not the answer in this situation.
ZEIT: Do YOU have an answer?
Fuku-san: No.
ZEIT: Is the world drifting LEFT?
Fuku-san: Yes.
ZEIT: Could governments OVERTAX themselves with this deficit spending?
Fuku-san: Yes. Human beings tend toward extremes. We will now over-spend and over-regulate everything.
ZEIT: Is REAGAN’S SAYING that government is part of the problem and not part of the solution still valid?
Fuku-san: Yes. We’re not Social Democrats, after all.
ZEIT: Is AMERICAN CAPITALISM in a CRISIS?
Fuku-san: No.
ZEIT: That’s a rather sober attitude considering THE MILLIONS OF UNEMPLOYED.
Fuku-san: I’m a very sober person.
ZEIT: But even sober observers think that CAPITALISM finds itself in a MORAL CRISIS.
Fuku-san: I don’t see how. And should you be referring to the so-called bailout plans, these are aimed at saving the little guy, not the big fat cat. No finance, mucho problemo for them, and for all of us. Get it?
ZEIT: Does AMERICA’S CRISIS also have a cultural dimension?
Fuku-san: Yes, in that we have to return to our Puritan roots and stop living on credit. But you don’t do Puritan roots over here, if I recall, and I was of the understanding that you believed we never had any culture to begin with.
ZEIT: So Amerika became dependent upon China (for money), you say, that sounds like THE END OF THE AMERICAN AGE and the rise of Asia.
Fuku-san: Hard to say. A nation’s real strength comes to light in times of adversity, not during times of general growth. And as for China, something tells me they’re not ten feet tall after all.
ZEIT: Do you still believe in AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM?
Fuku-san: Yes.
ZEIT: Once as NEOCON you supported THE IRAQ WAR, then you distanced yourself from the policy. How will history judge BUSH here?
Fuku-san: Impossible to say. Perhaps, in twenty years, historians will write that because of the US policy there, Iraq became a shining democracy for the entire Arab world.
ZEIT: Do you really believe THAT? Couldn’t you be mistaken?
Fuku-san: Yes, I could be mistaken. How about you?
ZEIT: Perhaps history will take A DIFFERENT TURN.
Fuku-san: If you’re referring to my book, I don’t think so. I believe I was right.
ZEIT: Can a REPENTANT NEOCON like yourself BELIEVE in BARACK OBAMA, too?
Fuku-san: Obama will go in the right direction, but he’ll only be following the road that Bush has already taken.
„Ich glaube nicht, dass die Franzosen einen Algerier oder die Deutschen einen Türken zum Kanzler wählen würden. Auch wenn Amerika von Zeit zu Zeit fatale Fehler begeht, hat es die Kraft, sich immer wieder neu zu erfinden. Das lässt hoffen.”
Are we getting any closer yet? Are we getting any warmer? Do you feel like reading about “one of the coldest” German winters of the past hundred years today?
Or do you feel more like warming up to an article about how the Baltic and North Sea are warming up, again?
Strange that you can get such, uh, variety these days, don’t you think? When it comes to newspaper articles about the weather, I mean. Or when it comes to newspaper articles about the climate, if you prefer (yes, I know that they’re different).
Where you won’t get any variation is in the absolute certainty that CO2 is the culprit behind climate change these days (unfortunately, it couldn’t have been the culprit behind the countless climate changes of the past). Talk about a given. It’s not even brought up anymore in these articles. It’s so understood that it’s, well, well understood. It can only be CO2, after all. It’s the law or something.
Of course CO2 is never brought up when it comes to the cold temperatures we’re going through right at the moment, that’s different, that’s just the weather. I understand this. I think. But I’m no scientist, OK? Much less one of those 10,000 objective scientist types working for the UN, and even much lesser so one of those few and far between scientist-in-denial types who either simply don’t get it because they’re not as smart as we are or are on somebody evil’s payroll. The worthless pukes.
But I’m no fool, you know. I’m just a concerned citizen of the world. And I’m freezing my freakin’ *#!?%%! off already trying to figure this stuff out, OK? What do you think? Am I getting any warmer yet?
“Die Studie steht in vollem Einklang mit den Ergebnissen des Weltklimarats IPCC.“
Get out the vote and rock it and like who the hell cares that you’re not registered yet? This is the Internet or something.
You’ve got ’til Monday, punk.
Ekel-TV (revulsion television) in Germany has certainly seen better days. No, come to think of it, it hasn’t.
Truly international as usual, „Ich bin ein Star – Holt mich hier raus!“ or, if you prefer, “I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here!”, only in German production, this year’s season is really going to revolt or spew or rock or whatever it is you choose to call it big time.
RTL’s star line up will include a well seasoned actress with prison experience, a freshly-operated transsexual and someone who actually goes by the name of “the white negro from Hasenbergl.” I’m speechless almost. With stars like these you don’t need enemies.
Needless to say, I’ll just have to watch, at least once. And so will you, because needless to say, it’s pointless to try to resist.
“Don’t go for help… no one will hear you.”
If you’re Knut the freakin’ polar bear maybe.
Man is it sure cold in Berlin these days. How cold, you ask?
It’s so cold you need jumper cables to get the German drivers going (German cars still start up just fine).
Cold? It’s so cold Berlin’s mayor actually slept with a woman last night.
Why it’s so cold that German politicians are keeping their hands in their own pockets for once. Or they’re considering it at least.
Cold? When I tried taking down the garbage this morning it refused to go.
Observing Hermann 