Only in Germany

Possible Al Qaeda terrorist attacks? Who cares? Germans have more important things to get hysterical about: A train station project.

That’s right. But this isn’t just any train station project we’re talking about here, folks. This is the now imfamous “Stutttgart 21” train station project, whatever the hell that means.

I don’t understand this, as usual. And the more I read about it the more I see how I won’t be able to. As far as I can tell, it’s a new station that’s part of a long planned high-speed rail project that would connect Stuttgart to nearby Ulm as part of a major European transportation infrastructure project “that would eventually see a high-speed link running between Paris and Bratislava, Slovakia.”

So far so good. But then “das Volk” in Stuttgart went ape about something. I still don’t really know what it was, other than maybe it’s about having to cut down a few trees to build this thing, but now it’s devolved into out and out Revolutionary Romanticism (German style), complete with heroic demonstrations of resistance and real live police brutality (only after the demonstrators provoked them, of course).

Building a freakin’ train station becomes a Politikum (big political issue) here, in other words. But that won’t really surprise anyone who has spent any time in Germany. This kind of stuff happens here all the time. It’s easy to be part of the German Resistance Movement This Week when what you’re resisting is as, well, about as harmless as it gets. It’s so pitiful it’s not even funny. It’s hilarious.

4 responses

  1. Terrorist threat is currently in the “worry queue.” They haven’t gotten there yet because there are so many other things to worry about first, and we do have to do these things chronologically. For example, income inequality, Atomkraft, Laub im Garten, and proximity to France are worries that haven’t been properly obsessed over yet, and these have been lingering for decades. Let them worry these issues officially out, and then maybe in 2050 they’ll get around to worrying about terrorism.

    Or maybe they’ll just complain that each drone strike in Pakistan produces enough greenhouse gasses to kill at least three trees, and demand that we stop.

  2. So true. That Laub-im-Garten-Problematik ain’t ever gonna get properly addressed either (“He’s never gonna catch that roadrunner.”). They had their chance there with that grand coalition, but it’s all over now man.

  3. To help get on with the whole mess, allow me to becalm the masses of protestors and politicos, truely non-politically with the following:

    Opinions are like assholes:
    Everyone’s gotta have one.

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