Who’s Your Daddy?

The German birth rate is suddenly spiking or something. I knew you could do it, guys.

Pregnant

German officials say growing numbers of pregnant immigrant women are paying German men to pose as fathers so that they can qualify for residency.

German broadcaster RBB found up to 700 cases in Berlin alone. “There are many unreported cases,” said Ole Schröder, a top interior ministry official.

Some pregnant immigrant women are reported to have paid fake fathers and solicitors as much as €5,000 (£4,356; $5,628) to get paternity registered. Once that is done, the baby automatically becomes a German citizen and the mother has the right to stay.

“Wir haben teilweise Personen, die über zehn Vaterschaften annerkannt haben.”

Germany Gets Pregnant?

Well you’ve got to call the show something. Other than bizarre, I mean. And no, it’s not a science fiction program.

Schwanger werden kann jeder!

Germans really love watching these, well, let’s call them reality-TV-advice-giving-practical-handbook-or-guide kind of shows these days. There’s one out there on how to be an adult, one about how to have somebody else raise your kids for you, and even one about how to get out of debt, to describe just a few. You know, stuff like that.

But what if you don’t have any kids to be raised by somebody else and therefore no debts to get out of? This new Germany Gets Pregnant show is here to help, I guess. Apparently a lost art, this program (twelve steps?) will show those interested (not many, really) everything they will need to know to, you know, have babies.

“Nach der Baby-Show kann RTL kaum tiefer sinken.”