Meet The New Crisis

Same as the old crisis. So like what, me worry?


“I think there is no need to talk about a euro crisis,” German Finance Minister Wolfgang Schaeuble said after Italian voters defeated the referendum on constitutional amendments. “I think we should see the situation in Italy with a certain calmness. That is how democratic and constitutional processes work in the member states. The Italians have decided, that is to be respected. They will make the best of it.”

I admire his serenity (Greece, Brexit, Italy…). And I’d also like to know what kind of tranquilizers this guy is on.

Die Lage in Italien heute besser als vor zwei Jahren.

Seven Years Of Famine Or Something

No short-term pain, no long-term gain.

“There might well be seven lean years ahead for the world economy,” German Finance Minister Wolfgang Schaeuble said in a speech at a meeting of Nobel laureates at the University of St. Gallen in Switzerland.

What he really meant was seven years of fiscal consolidation (austerity measures) in Europe (and elsewhere?). This is the key to long-term growth, he says. My, how, uh, German or something.

Jiminy Crickets. As if the ten plagues of late hadn’t been bad enough already, now the Germans themselves (they own Europe, you see, and are recreating it in their own image) are going to inflict the Pharaohs of the EU with seven years of boils, hail, locusts and darkness. In the form of austerity measures, I mean. Or maybe they won’t. Hard to say for sure. Could be that monkeys will fly out of their butts instead.

Muddy Waters knew the deal:

On the seventh hour, of the seventh day,
on the seventh month, the seventh economic witch doctor say:
“He’s born for good luck, and I know you see;
Got seven hundred euros, and don’t you mess with me.