And any flavor you want, simultaneously.
Germany is toast! Germany doing better! Whatever.
German industrial production fell unexpectedly in March, decreasing by 0.7% from the previous month, the federal statistics office said on Friday.
Analysts polled by Reuters had predicted a 0.5% rise.
Which makes them happy.
Which makes them miserable again.
German Business Sentiment Dives to Lowest Since 2020 as War Hits Outlook – Sentiment is at its lowest level since the Covid-19 pandemic, when lockdowns and restrictions hammered businesses.
That means growth.
A rare occurance in Germany these days.
Energy price shock slows growth – The war in Iran is dashing hopes for a sustained economic recovery. This is throwing the Merz administration’s entire economic policy strategy into disarray.
Because their industries are dying, or already dead.
And this is primarily due to its climate emissions targets.
Germany misses climate targets as emissions barely fall in 2025 – Greenhouse gases dropped just 0.1% last year as environment minister criticises lack of improvement.
Greenhouse gas emissions in Germany have again missed targets set by the Climate Protection Act and barely fell at all in 2025.
Emissions decreased by just 0.1% last year compared to the previous year, according to data from the German Environment Agency.
And that’s saying a lot.
Energy bottleneck in Middle East is damaging German economy – Expensive energy, rising prices and disrupted supply chains are all bad news for economic growth. The German government is alarmed by events in the Middle East.
When the US and Israel attacked Iran, the response was not long in coming. Iran is no longer allowing ships to pass through its coastal waters. The Strait of Hormuz, the bottleneck in the Persian Gulf through which 20% of the global oil trade passes every day, is now effectively blocked.
After the attack, the price of oil immediately rose sharply. Prices for gasoline and diesel also skyrocketed at German gas stations. Depending on the region, premium gasoline even went as high €2.50 ($2.89) per liter. The average price for diesel is currently just over €2, which is €0.30 higher than before the attack on Iran.
More like a dead cat bounce.
German Economy Grows by 0.3% in Q4, Stats Office Says – The German economy grew by 0.3% in the fourth quarter of 2025 compared with the previous quarter, the statistics office said on Wednesday, confirming its preliminary reading.
Meanwhile… German auto exports to China plunged by a third in 2025, economic institute says.
“It’s about the sausage” or “it’s down to the sausage” means it’s now or never.
Germany’s economy is so bad even sausage factories are closing – High costs and stagnant spending are putting businesses through the meat grinder.
That means bankruptcy.
German business bankruptcies hit decade high amid downturn – Business bankruptcies have climbed to an 11-year high, with small firms hardest hit by Germany’s anemic growth. Economists warn of job losses but see tentative signs that the insolvency wave may be leveling off.
Don’t worry, in other words. Once everybody has gone bankrupt the bankruptcies will stop.
And become less dependent on the United States.
Germany’s Merz: Europe must become less dependent on United States – German Chancellor Friedrich Merz on Tuesday rejected a blistering attack on European democracies by the Trump administration, which issued a strategy paper last week declaring that the continent faced “civilizational erasure.”
The U.S. National Security Strategy, made public last week, caused shock across Europe, with a broadside that accused European governments of “subversion of democratic processes” and said U.S. policy should include “cultivating resistance” within the European Union.
That means free fall.
The Federation of German Industries (BDI) believes that Germany’s economy is in “free fall.” German industry is currently facing a dramatic low point, BDI President Peter Leibinger told the news agency dpa. “The economy is in its worst crisis since the Federal Republic was founded, but the federal government is not responding decisively enough.”
A new industry report expects industrial production to decline by two percent this year. This would be the fourth consecutive year of decline. “This is not a temporary dip, but a structural decline,” Leibinger said. German industry is continuously losing ground.
Observing Hermann 