It’s passé, José

Remember when hysterical warnings about the approaching climate catastrophe used to be en vogue here in Germany? You remember, long, long ago. Like during that near-snowed-out UN climate summit held in Copenhagen last year? That’s all passé now, for some inexplicable reason. And I, for one, really miss all the brouhaha.

The media here barely even bothered to cover the latest doomed UN climate summit, this time held in Cancun, Mexico, I think. The little coverage you could find was so drab, so pragmatic, so, I don’t know, so businesslike, it put you right to sleep. Well it did me.

Like where did all the fire go? Not a single riot anywhere. Where’s all the hybris and the hype? Whatever happened to those drowning polar bears and ticking clocks and time bombs and other highly dramatic life and death symbolic scenarios (scenario symbolics?)? Sure, I know, time has actually run out for us already. Copenhagen was the last chance (or was it Kyoto?), and yet the snow, I mean show must still go on, mustn’t it? But what do we get now? Now all anybody wants to talk about are emission certificates. Emission certificates and business opportunities. Pitiful. I remember when our planet’s future used to be at stake. Now the only thing at stake is “multilateralism.” Boooring.

Mad? You bet I’m mad, mister. It’s disgusting, I tell ya. I’m disillusioned (have you been dis-illusioned yet?). It’s freakin’ UN climate summits like these that give global warming a bad name.

“Climate change itself is changing — from an existential danger to civilization into an opportunity for profit.”

Poor victim

You know, that heroic and hunted infowarrior, that valiant and victimized whitleblowing fighter for transparancy, that modern-day Robin Hood, uh, rapist dude?

Like wow, “they” got him already. And this before any of us had even found out that he was “the US’s public enemy no. 1,” at least as far as the Spiegel is concerned, I mean. Well sorry, I hadn’t known it yet.

But that’s just me again, I guess. I really didn’t think WikiLeak’s anti-American crusade was anything particularly out of the ordinary. I don’t even notice stuff like this anymore, you see.

Sure they violated the secrecy of diplomatic relations and put people in danger in the process and all that, but hey, it was all in the name of… In whose name was it again? Oh yeah, in that guy’s name up there.

“He is accused by the Swedish authorities of one count of unlawful coercion, two counts of sexual molestation and one count of rape, all alleged to have been committed in August 2010.”

And speaking of Iraq…

Uh oh. This could be one of the worst WikiLeaks yet.

It might even force Germans to reevaluate their claims that the only reason the United States went to Iraq was for the oil.

Nah.

“Contrary to what many people believe, the Iraq war provided few advantages for the US oil industry. The diplomatic cables show that, in most cases, it was competitors to the Americans who often did better in the country.”

Westerwelle in Iraq: “We want to send a signal”

And the signal is: We think it’ll be safe enough for us now to start making money down there again.

German Foreign Minister Guido Westerwelle made a surprise visit to Baghdad on Saturday, calling for more economic engagement in that country (he means of the German kind), which really isn’t much of a surpise, if you ask me.

In particular, a bilateral deal on the protection of investments is expected to be signed with Industry Minister Fawzi Hariri, with the new accord helping improve “economic and legal conditions for German companies” working in Iraq.

Geld ist doch für alle da

There’s money here for everybody. Remember the financial crisis? Long, long ago (in Germany)?

It seems that the Federal Reserve’s emergency loan programs really helped out a lot after all–German banks, that is. Hey, what’s a few trillion among friends?

Deutsche Banken haben das Förderprogramm der US-Notenbank inmitten der Finanzkrise kräftig genutzt.

Americans caught reflecting Germany’s critical media views

In an embarrassing embarrassment following Wikileaks’ leak of leaked US despatches, US diplomats in Germany have been caught making the very same derisive remarks about leading German politicians that Germany’s critical media makes.

Among other shocking revelations, it was revealed that US officials see Angela Merkel as being someone who “avoids risk,” Guido Westerwelle as being “arrogant” and Wolfgang Schäuble as being “an angry old man.”

“This is all just too embarassing to even describe,” said one anonymous high-level American diplomat wearing a brown paper bag over his head. “The leaking the leak part was bad enough, but to be caught red-handed like this expressing the very same views about German leaders that Germans themselves hold of them is just like, I dunno, I’m just so ashamed. And not worthy. But that’s not an official statement or anything. And turn that camera and mike off already, will ya?”

Maybe history does repeat itself

At least when it comes to Germany’s interest in benefitting from currency troubles, I mean. Hey Greece, Ireland, Portugal, Spain, Italy… Stay hard-up or shut-up.

”The key principle of German economic policy was to persuade the French and Italians to lower the value of the D-mark so as to make Germany more competitive.”

“The Berlin government’s intransigence over the debt issue, while politically understandable from a German point of view, seemingly pays little heed to the realities of the euro economy, which are heavily tilted towards Germany.”

“In pre-EMU days, if the German economy were growing at an estimated 3.7% as it is this year, the German currency and interest rates would both come under upward pressure – damping exporters’ performance and the growth outlook. Now, however, with all EMU economies shackled together, and devaluation an impossibility for the peripheral countries, the hard-up states have nowhere to hide. Germany continues to profit from excellent export performance — and it can self-righteously point the finger of blame for the euro area’s woes at those debt-ridden peripheral states.”

Nothing Nouveau on the German Front

This is a very complex article, I grant you, a lot like that other one I mentioned recently, but with a little bit of effort I think I can somehow manage to summarize it for you thus (and I quote, more or less):

American society is breaking apart.

Everything is spiraling further and further into the abyss.

The American people are going through a Kafkaesque odyssey, the humiliation of which is hard to comprehend.

Help is not in sight, our government and our society have abandoned us.

Wall Street is preoccupied with chasing new profits again.

That old myth about working your way up, of bootstrap success and its ultimate prize, homeownership, has evaporated.

The middle class, America’s backbone, is crumbling.

The American Dream has turned into a nightmare.

Nothing’s going to happen because the political swing to the right is extremely hurtful and absolutely disastrous to the interest of the weakest.

Becoming unemployed is a devious trap. And on and on and tra, la, la until the amen part.

Like, you had no idea, did you? My fellow Americans, I mean. So there you have it. Yet again. And no, the O Word didn’t appear in this article either.

Germany and China vs. the USA

Guess who wins (these days, I mean)? Duh. But it’s only a paritial victory, as Germany tries to spin it (they don’t want to gloat all too much publically).

After China and Germany teamed up and publicly slammed the Federal Reserve’s decision to buy $600 billion in Treasury bonds last week, now they’re shoulder to shoulder at the G20 successfully resisting this EVIL infusion of cash (= dollar devaluation) together too. They are doing this because, well, only China is allowed to devaluate its currency, I guess. And a weak dollar also means a strong euro which would hurt German exports and, well, this isn’t allowed to happen either.

Strange bedfellows aren’t they? Sure. What can/will President Obama do about it? Not much, it seems. But at least everybody over there still really, really likes him. And that’s the main thing.

It’s a mystery, isn’t it? How we got here, I mean? Well, no. I guess it isn’t. But why this happened as it did is all too, uh, deep for me. It’s kind of like this current German hole within a hole conundrum going on.

I mean, don’t like two holes make a non-hole?

“Obama muss klein beigeben”

Ah! Scenic Lake Constance…

The charming landscape, the panoramic views, the armaments industries booming everywhere…

Of course none of these companies (or the communities that live off them) use terms like that if they can avoid it. They prefer calling them “security engineering” or “defense technology” businesses instead, for some strange reason. Maybe because like everwhere else in Germany, they’re all pacifists down here too? Interesting article.

“Genuine pacifists are hard to find around Lake Constance. Most have turned more pragmatic long ago–or maybe their name is Nena. The pop singer performed here last year at MTU’s 100th year anniversary company celebration. And she sang her peace song 99 Luftballons too, of course, and 14,000 guests sang along with her. Before Nena arrived, the celebration’s main attraction had been a Leopard II tank.”

“Laut dem schwedischen Friedensforschungsinstitut Sipri liegt die Bundesrepublik auf Rang drei hinter den USA und Russland–und das, obwohl die deutschen Exportkontrollen zu den strengsten der Welt zählen.”