Our Man In Havana

Is now in Berlin. And in China, Russia, Austria, etc.

US officials stationed in Germany developed symptoms of the Havana Syndrome, a mysterious ailment linked to suspected radiation attacks that have stricken hundreds of American spies and diplomats around the world…

The symptoms were first reported in 2016 by US diplomats in Cuba, where the suspected “sonic attacks” changed the brain structure of 40 former staffers at the US Embassy in Havana.

The attacks have also occurred in China, Russia and Austria, and have long been suspected to be connected to Russia. Many victims were intelligence officers or emissaries working on Russian-related issues.

A CIA task force headed by an official who was involved in the search for Osama Bin Laden is currently probing the cause of the hard-to-diagnose symptoms, which have reportedly afflicted as many as 200 Americans…

“It could be that the attacks were outsourced to organized crime, but it is very difficult to understand why the Russians or anyone else would do this. It seems like a campaign to hurt people for no apparent reason.”

Hysteria Half-Life Not Yet Reached In Germany

Nor will it be any time soon. It must be artificially maintained in order to justify the German Energiewende, you see.

Chernobyl

Thirty years after the Chernobyl disaster, it has become clear that radioactivity might be less harmful than originally thought. Some researchers even believe it may be beneficial in small doses.

That is a surprising finding. Three decades ago, half of Western Europe was contaminated with weakly radioactive precipitation. The public at large was taught to view the ubiquitous radioactivity as particularly insidious.

But now, apparently not everything that gives off radiation is bad after all. The body seems to be able to cope with low doses of radon. “We are continuing to search for damage to the genome,” says Fournier, “but so far we aren’t seeing anything.”

Who would voluntarily breathe in radioactive gas? These days, there are people who do. They swear by the notorious noble gas radon, created by the decay of uranium: They inhale it deeply.

Cukes, Kooks and Nukes

I tell you, DANGER is everywhere you look these days. If it’s not deadly organic cucumbers (sorry, Spain, we didn’t mean to ruin your cucumber industry with a false alarm like that, no hard feelings, OK?), it’s freakin’ Ikea alarm clock attacks by “The Easily-Broken Kids Room Furniture Liberation Army” in the Benelux (thanks, Joe).

And then of course there’s the ongoing, ever-growing radiation alarms after the Japan Nuclear Crisis in, uh, London and New York.

Stop the world I want to get off or something.

“Whatever the radiation in Tokyo at the moment, you can be fairly sure it is lower than natural background levels in many parts of the world.”