“Adapting” Standards

It’s not just in the United States that standards in education must remain, uh, flexible.

Idiocracy

Germany has to keep adapting its standards too. Take Germany’s federal cops. Please.

Germany to lower language requirements for federal police recruits – Facing a shortage of recruits, authorities have reportedly had to “adapt” their standards for the current generation.

In a bid to fill thousands of new positions this year, Germany’s federal police (Bundespolizei) has lowered requirements for recruits, according to a media report published Monday.

The newspapers of the Funke Media Group reported on the changes, noting that physical fitness requirements as well as the language level in exams have been changed.

“We must adapt to the societal changes of young people with relation to the mental and physical requirements for the police profession.”

German Word Of The Day: Unwort

That means un-word or taboo word. Which brings us to the German un-word of the year 2019: Klimahysterie.

Hysteria

That means “climate hysteria” (ín German it’s one word).

A “language critical” jury has selected climate hysteria as the taboo word of the year 2019. The rationale behind the decision is that it “slanders the climate protection movement and its efforts.”

Yes, as a matter of fact it does. But this wasn’t a “political critical” decision, it was a “language critical” one, right? The Brain Police are everywhere, people. Everywhere, I tell you…

Eine sprachkritische Jury hat “Klimahysterie” zum Unwort des Jahres 2019 gekürt, Ausdruck würden “Klimaschutzbemühungen und die Klimaschutzbewegung diffamiert und Debatten diskreditiert”, hieß es zur Begründung.

East Germans Should Stop Moaning Like East Germans

And learn to moan more like us West Germans do.

East

German political grandee Wolfgang Schäuble on Saturday said the country should recognize the huge social upheaval the eastern states have experienced since reunification. But he also warned eastern Germans that they should show more self-confidence and less cynicism.

The West German lack of self-confidence and its deep-seated victim culture are much more refined, he did not add, and its particular brand of cynicism is leagues more schooled and sophisticated than the cynicism in the East. You could learn a whole lot from us so get on with it already, he did not say either.

“Some maintain their own victim status, instead of confidently pointing out their valuable experience in adapting to massive social upheaval, compared to the West.”

What’s The Password?

To get your password? And where’s your passport? How do we know you’re you?

Password

German University Forced to Hand Out 38,000 Passwords in Person – Password resets are usually pretty straightforward. But a university in Germany is requiring every student to line up and personally pick up their passwords for the school’s email system following a malware attack.

The University of Giessen is making the odd request because the school is a member of a German research network with strict rules. As a result, the university must follow legal requirements that ensure the new passwords are handed to the real owner, and not someone else, it explained in a notice.

“There is no alternative to this procedure.”

Jesus Just Left Chicago

Madrid, actually. But once she got to Germany nobody offered her a place to sit.

Greta

Nobody needed to. She also had a first class ticket. But that’s beside the point or something. I just don’t get it. Doesn’t Greta HERSELF have her own special train or, you know, mobile field headquarters or something along those lines?

Climate activist Greta Thunberg and Germany’s national railway company created a tweetstorm Sunday after she posted a photo of herself sitting on the floor of a train surrounded by lots of bags.

The image has drawn plenty of comment online about the performance of German railways.

Wir wünschen #Greta eine gute Heimfahrt. Und arbeiten weiter hart an mehr Zügen, Verbindungen und Sitzplätzen.

The Scandal Nobody Wants To Talk About

Because it reveals the Media Brain Police for who they are.

Relotius

Granted, this guy was a real artist but can you imagine the armies of lesser charlatans out there who furnish us with our news each and every day? No media bias or fake news here, right?

The furore surrounding Der Spiegel journalist Claas Relotius is back, with a book by the colleague who exposed him –

Fiction and non-fiction can feed off each other in unusual ways. In the winter of 2018, Germany was shaken by the biggest media scandal since the forged Hitler diaries, after it emerged that the country’s bastion of investigative journalism – DER SPIEGEL – had published stories by a reporter who had “fictionalised” his prize-winning articles with armies of invented characters. Now the “Relotius scandal” has gone into its second round, with the publication of a non-fiction book by the journalist who exposed his fraudulent colleague: a detective story about the search for truth in the era of fake news that makes a more gripping read than most novelists could have managed…

Before he was exposed, he had won the top prize for German reporters, the Reporterpreis, four times in six years. One judge praised his stories as jumping off the page “almost like literature”. He was in line for a promotion at Der Spiegel.

Doctors, Lawyers, Engineers…

And organized crime professionals.

Mobsters

Germans were told time and time again starting back in 2015 that a significant number of the Syrian refugees illegally entering the country at that time were of the highest professional standing and would soon be a great enrichment for the country. I will not say that this did not happen but they could have at least mentioned the professional mobster folks too.

Newcomers from Syria, Iraq and other countries are changing the structure of organized crime in Germany, federal police representatives told the public broadcaster ARD in a new documentary set to be aired on Monday evening.

While investigating Arab-linked crime families, Germany’s BKA (Federal Criminal Police Agency) noted a rising number of suspects with foreign passports.

“In about one third of proceedings, suspects also included immigrants — and that means that we need to keep a very close eye on this phenomenon,” BKA leader Holger Münch said.

“The rule of law is under pressure.”

Nobody Had Any Intention Of Building A Wall

Right. And nobody had any intention of tearing it down twenty-eight years later either.

Walter Ulbricht

But, you know, stuff happens.

In his lack of preparation, he mistakenly insinuated that the checkpoints in the Berlin Wall — which up until then were guarded by soldiers with orders to shoot anyone trying to cross — were now open. They weren’t, but that announcement was all East Berliners needed to storm the wall and demand they be allowed to cross into West Berlin. After that, the wall became obsolete, and soon fell.

Virtual Socialist Reality

Last call for boarding to Cold War Berlin. Don’t forget your VR goggles.

Berlin

Who says time travel isn’t possible?

30 years later, Berlin Wall comes back to life with virtual reality – German startup offering visitors and history buffs an ‘authentic’ and immersive Cold War-era tour of the divided capital.

A packed bus approaches Checkpoint Charlie, the Cold War’s most famous border crossing, as grim-faced East German guards whisper among themselves about whether to hold you for questioning.

After a few heart-stopping minutes, you and your fellow passengers are free to pass into the smog, soot and shadowy intrigue of 1980s East Berlin.

Das Ost-Berlin vor dem Mauerfall ersteht für Touristen wieder auf. Mit VR-Brille kann man eine Stadtrundfahrt vom Checkpoint Charlie zum Palast der Republik unternehmen, vorbei an Gendarmenmarkt und „Ahornblatt”.

This Just In: Poor People Have It Tougher Than Those Who Aren’t Poor

Poverty, unemployment and poor education in Germany lead to tougher lives and shorter life spans.

Arbeit

Wow. Who would have thought that? I’m sure thankful that researchers up at the Max Planck Institute in Rostock were able to finally make this major scientific breakthrough. The tons of German taxpayer money that went into this study were certainly well spent. Now maybe something will finally be done to stop poverty here. Apparently no one has been doing anything about it up until now. Thumbs up to you, researchers!

In a related story (see the link at the bottom of the same article), it has also been determined that the older the human body gets the more it weakens and – now get this – that this decline is inevitable.

Armut, Arbeitslosigkeit und schlechte Bildung gehen in Deutschland mit einer deutlich verkürzten Lebenserwartung einher.