Germans Were Skeptical About Vaccinations Before

Why should they trust them any more now? Should a vaccination against COVID-19 ever be available, I mean.

Vaccine

According to a French online survey of parents in five European countries, Germany has a relatively high proportion of people who refuse vaccinations, when compared with the other nations; nearly 3% absolutely refuse to have their children vaccinated. The German Federal Center for Health Education (BZgA) says that around 20% of the population is skeptical when it comes to vaccines…

Unlike in some EU countries, in Germany it has always been up to the individual whether they want to get a recommended vaccine.

“The idea that compulsory vaccinations will be carried out in the future is quite widespread among conspiracy theorists.”

Semblance Of Normal Life Beginning In Germany

I mean, it’s beginning to look like the semblance of normal life that was normal life here in Germany before cornavirus hit. That kind of normal.

Covid19

It may only be a semblance but that’s about all you can hope for here, people.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel set out plans Wednesday for the gradual reopening of the country after weeks-long restrictions imposed to stem the spread of the coronavirus.

Limits on social contact will remain in place until June 5, she said, but Germans can now meet with members of one other household as well as their own. People must still remain 1.5 meters apart and cover their mouths and noses in public.

Shops can reopen but with additional hygiene measures, Merkel said, speaking at a news conference following a video meeting with the prime ministers of Germany’s 16 states.

„Wir können uns ein Stück Mut leisten, aber wir müssen vorsichtig bleiben.“

Germans Now Testing On Human Subjects

Despite hearing every five minutes in the German media that a coronavirus vaccine won’t be availble anytime even remotely soon so forget about it already, a German pharmaceutical company has begun testing a potential vaccine on human beings THEMSELVES.

Frankenstein

If things go really bad they might receive regulatory approval really soon and begin trials in the United States too.

“We are leaving no stone unturned as we explore every option to help provide society with a treatment or cure.”

But Have They Checked Her For Mad Cow Disease?

Angela Merkel negative for coronavirus after first test, with more to come.

Mad Cow

Merkel went into quarantine at home on Sunday evening after being informed that a doctor who had administered a vaccination to her had tested positive for the new coronavirus. She received the precautionary vaccination against pneumococcal infection on Friday.

Three’s A Crowd

And we don’t like crowds. You’re under arrest.

Restrictions

Has Germany imposed a total curfew? No. But more than two people can’t be outside together — unless they’re part of the same household. Going for a walk with a friend is fine, even if you don’t live with them, but groups of three or more are forbidden unless you’re family or roommates. A minimum distance of “at least 1.5 meters (5 feet), or better yet 2 meters” should be maintained whenever possible, Chancellor Angela Merkel said as she announced the new measures on Sunday.

“Keine Empfehlungen, sondern Regeln.”

Not If You Work For A Living

Is Germany’s health care system a model for the U.S.?

Health

Nope. Unless you want to pay a considerable amount of what you earn for your regular health insurance (15 percent – and climbing) – that’s the el cheapo insurance, by the way, the “private” insurance costs much more. Your husband/wife get to pay that fifteen percent, too. Then you get to pay extra for countless other things like dental work (1000 euros for a crown ain’t no big deal, for example) And if you’re a freelance, self-employed type you normally can’t even afford the regular insurance. You have no choice, however. You cannot opt out when it comes to insurance here.

However, if you’re on the dole and even openly admit that you have no intention of going back to work, everything is covered for you.

This is what “free health care” comes down to, folks.

“The ones who are able to pay more, pay more. And the ones who aren’t able to pay that much, don’t pay that much.”

We’re Not Worthy!

Actually, we’re too worthy – and that’s the problem.

Rich

If they think their ranking on rich lists is too low, American tycoons fume. German ones kick up a fuss when theirs looks suspiciously high, explains Heinz Dürr. When a magazine called him a billionaire a few years ago, Mr Dürr rang the editor to remonstrate. The reporters had double-counted his ownership of Homag, a maker of wood-processing machines that Dürr, his family’s mechanical-engineering firm, bought in 2014. Plutocrats have reached the top of politics in America and Italy, while in Asia the super-rich often display their wealth in ostentatious style. Germany’s magnates love to shun the limelight.

Which reminds me of German oddities 302 and 25.

German 302. Germans have a big Neid (envy) problem. They are perfectly aware of this and often complain that they live in a Neidgesellschaft (envy society) but keep turning green with envy all the same. One comedian claims that Germany is the only country in the world where the need for envy is stronger than the sex drive.

German Oddity 25. When Americans refer to something as being “typically American” they generally mean this in a positive way. When Germans refer to something as being “typically German” they generally mean this in a negative way.

Siggi Has A Blackout

Clearly still under shock after his party’s latest crisis, the SPD’s ex-boss Gabriel just accidentally praised Donald Trump.

Siggy

Needless to say he was immediately rushed to the nearest hospital and is currently under observation – and very strong medication.

German center-left SPD’s ex-leader Gabriel gives Trump praise – The US president is right to criticize China and to negotiate with North Korea, according to left-of-center former Foreign Minister Sigmar Gabriel. Gabriel also warned against seeing Trump voters as “dummies.”

“His criticism of China is justified, and so is his courage to negotiate with North Korea. And he is also right when he calls on Germany and Europe to get their terror-supporting citizens out of Syria and Iraq and put them on trial, instead of letting the Kurds deal with it.”

German Of The Day: Bildungsurlaub

That means educational or vocational training leave. You know, like that yoga course you took for your job?

Yoga

What? Your boss freaked out at the suggestion? Well, everybody does it here in Berlin. Yoga to go with the times, people.

A yoga course can be considered vocational training, a Berlin court has ruled, paving the way to doing the “Downward-facing Dog” or “Greet the Sun” on company time in Germany’s capital.

The state labour court for Berlin-Brandenburg has ruled a worker has the right to paid leave so they can attend a five-day adult education course entitled “Yoga I – successful and relaxed at work with yoga and meditation”.

The judge ruled that under Berlin’s Educational Leave Act, even a yoga course fulfills the far-reaching criteria of “professional development” which would promote an individual’s “adaptability and self-assertion”.

“Yoga I – erfolgreich und entspannt im Beruf mit Yoga und Meditation.”

This Doll Must Die

Don’t EVER let anybody tell you that Germans are lasch (feeble) when it comes to threats posed to them by foreign intelligence snoops.

Cayla

Forget about not caring about Putin & Co., forget about spinning your wheels ridiculously with your NSA spying affair. We’ve got a real live (sort of) freakin’ wi-fi-connected Internet doll on the loose and we’re all going to die if we don’t kill her first. OK. So we don’t know who she’s working for yet. But still.

A German government watchdog has ordered parents to destroy an internet-connected doll for fear it could be used as a surveillance device. According to a report from BBC News, the German Federal Network Agency said the doll (which contains a microphone and speaker) was equivalent to a “concealed transmitting device” and therefore prohibited under German telecom law…

“My Friend Cayla” uses a microphone to listen to questions, sending this audio over Wi-Fi to a third-party company (Nuance) that converts it to text. This is then used to search the internet, allowing the doll to answer basic questions, like “What’s a baby kangaroo called?”

Why would anybody want to know what a baby kangaroo is called, huh?

And this is just the beginning, too. These wi-fi-thingies will soon be everywhere. “It doesn’t matter what that object is — it could be an ashtray or a fire alarm.” Damn right. So after you’ve finished strangling this doll toss everything else out of the window while you’re at it. Just in case. They’re out to get us, people. They’re everywhere, I tell you. Whoever they are. Bad dolly!

At what point did we enter this Philip K. Dick novel, anyway?