And This Year’s Winner Of The German Spitzel, Spy And Whistleblower Award Goes To…

When you get the top award in the category of Best Informant from a country like Germany, you know you have most definitley reached the top of your game.

Snowden

And so it comes as no surprise to most Hollywood award-watchers out there that Edward Snowden has just received the German “Whistleblower Prize” in recognition of his “bold efforts” to expose the monitoring of communications data by his trusted, I mean trusting employer.

As we all know, Germany enjoys an incredibly long and rich tradition of abusing individual freedoms, usually in the form of “Spitzel” or spying activity practised between private individuals, regardless of the current political or totalitarian system they may find themselves in, so this prestigeous award immediately skyrockets Snowden to the exalted ranks of the top double-crossing turncoats of recent German, if not world history.

Snowden himself was speechless. But this was mostly because he was not available for comment, nor will he be able to pick up said award for some strange reason, but still.

“Wir sind Edward Snowden außerordentlich dankbar.”

Snowden Hiding In Germany

Or maybe he isn’t. But he couldn’t have picked a better place to go underground if he is. Germany simply doesn’t exist like other places do — not online, I mean.

Google

One of my Berlin neighbors forced Google to pixelate the façade of my apartment building on its popular Street View service a few years ago in the name of Teutonic privacy. Whether I liked it or not, my home was pixel bombed into oblivion.

In fact, so many people have opted to blot out their houses that web guru Jeff Jarvis said at the time Germany had “digitally desecrated” its online landscape.

“Activists like Edward Snowden, Julian Assange and Bradley Manning need international support and our solidarity.”

Snowden: Enthüllungen von Anfang an geplant