Tag Archives: Japan

“There’s an app for that”

March 31, 2011 By in Hi-tech, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

And there’s a market for it too. In Germany there is.

This one is bound to sell like hotcakes. A German developer has wasted no time in bringing out an Apple app that gives you the location of the AKW nearest you. You know, Atomkraftwerk (nuclear power plant)?

It also gives the user the pertinant information about each one located like how soon we’re all gonna die, the next demonstration planned, the shutdown date. Stuff like that.
 
Dank des AKW-Finders muss man sich nun nicht mehr durch komplexe Online-Angebote arbeiten, sondern bekommt sämtliche Infos auf einen Blick präsentiert.

German Gaijin Just Don’t Get It

March 30, 2011 By in Helplessness, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , 1 Comment

How could they?

Here are some lines from a report by a Spiegel journalist who, being a product of his Umwelt (environment), obviously can’t understand what is going on with these peculiar, “fatalistic” Japanese who have the audacity to show courage in the face of disaster.

There is little evidence of panic.

There is not a single person protesting on the streets in the entire city (Tokyo).

Japanese fireman Nakamura Junichiro: “It was not my choice, but I wanted to go there. This is the most difficult hour for Japan. It was my duty.”

“The tsunami represents a good opportunity to cleanse this greed (the egoism the elder speaker believes his fellow Japanese have succombed to), and one we must avail ourselves of.”

The destructive forces of nature, writes Asia expert Ian Buruma, are “to a certain extent part of Japanese culture.” This creates fertile ground for a Japanese fatalism that has developed throughout history and culminates in the expression “shikata ga nai,” meaning “it can’t be helped.” A further product is the widespread belief that nothing beautiful on Earth is permanent and that the Japanese people must close ranks in times of national disaster.

Those who seek to wait it out in Osaka must be gaijin — a non-Japanese or outsider. Someone who doesn’t understand that now, more than ever, every cog in the wheel counts. Someone who shirks his responsibility while a hero like fireman Nakamura Junichiro risks his life to cool down the reactors in Fukushima.

Germans Shut Down Simpsons Too

March 29, 2011 By in Helections, Helplessness, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Just in case. For three months or so, I assume.

After the government shut down seven nuclear reactors for fear of, uh, fear itself, German broadcasters have now decided to ban episodes of The Simpsons that poke fun at nuclear disasters.

It seems that now that the Greens have exploited “the situation” (no, not that guy on Jersey Shore) and leapt to power in two state governments after elections held over the weekend, said broadcasters fear that hysterical Germans watching these episodes could die of hysterical laughter.

Chancellor Angela Merkel announced earlier this month a three-month moratorium on plans to extend the operating times of Germany’s nuclear plants and ordered that the seven oldest reactors be shut down.

If Germans got much greener…

March 28, 2011 By in Helections, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

They would start blending in with the leaves and the flowers here.

Green? They call their bicycles recycles here.

Table legs sprout roots here, it’s that green.

We’re talking green. One guy I know named his kid Kyoto.

Some folks are so green that they carry a tree around with them at all times for optimum air quality.

And German businesses aren’t much better these days. Some have turned so green that employees hug their corporate offices.

Green? They are so green that the very thought of unsorted garbage landing in a landfill makes them turn red.

Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E

March 24, 2011 By in Helections, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

Becomes final today. Me and little Sar-ko-sy will be goin’ away…

So much for France and Germany as the inseparable couple at the heart of Europe.

The issue here is not direct German military participation. Everyone would have understood if that was not possible. But how could Germany not support a UN resolution backed by its principal European partners, the United States and the Arab League?

Like so many contemporary European politicians, they (in the German government) follow rather than lead public opinion.

“We calculated the risk. If we see that three days after this intervention began, the Arab League already criticises [it], I think we had good reasons.” While French and British pilots risk their lives in action, the German foreign minister is virtually encouraging the Arab League to make further criticism.

Latest Angst Update:
++ Ticker Ticker++Several German container shipping companies have stopped going to eastern Japanese ports including Tokyo for the time being amid fears of radiation++ Ticker Ticker ++Fukushima radiation detected in Germany!!!

And thanks for this cool Angst Republic link, A.K.

Fossil Fools

March 21, 2011 By in Habitudes, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: , , , , , , , , 3 Comments

In Japan, we have seen mighty tectonic shifts, with tragic effects. In Germany, teutonic plates have been swirling around uncontrollably, and the country has undergone a nuclear U-turn at the hand of Angela Merkel, the normally iconically-cool Chancellor.

But now for something completely different: German energy puns.

Boy I tell ya, when it comes to shutting down nuclear power plants these Germans really know what’s watt.

I just heard all the German nuclear physicists have gone fission.

I guy I talked to says that now that they’ve shut down all these nuclear plants they’re gonna re-fuse to start them back up again.

Green? Why Germans are so green these days that they’ve resorted to planting light bulbs. They want to see if power plants will grow.

You know why wind power is so popular in this country? It has a lot of fans.

You know what they are going to call a power failure here pretty soon, don’t you? A current event.

I ran into this silly old German Green the other day. Man, talk about a fossil fool.

During the past week, the Germans have not set a good example, casting away logic and apparently deciding future energy policy on the basis of an emotional spasm rather than a clearly-thought out strategy.

Geiger Counters Needed Desperately (In Germany)

March 15, 2011 By in Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , 1 Comment

The German news folks have all hightailed it down south to Osaka and are reporting from there (or maybe they’re in Taiwan by now). The German embassy is soon to follow.

Their rescue teams have headed back to Germany after declaring that there is no one left in Japan to be rescued.

And now Geiger counters are selling out like hotcakes. Here in Germany, mind you.

Other than that though, the hysteria is being kept pretty much under control here. For the moment at least.

„Es gibt eine immense Absatzsteigerung. Wir haben in den vergangenen Tagen Hunderte Geräte verkauft.“

German Nuclear Reactors Can’t Withstand 9.0 Quake Either

March 15, 2011 By in Hysteria Tags: , , , , , 2 Comments

No, Germany doesn’t get hit by earthquakes. But it regularly gets hit by seismic waves of extreme and indulgent panic like the one that has just rolled over the country shortly after the monster quake hit Japan.

That is why Angela Merkel has wasted no time in going back on her government’s decision to extend the life of Germany’s nuclear power stations (they’ll think it through again for three months = forever?). Regional elections are coming up in a few weeks and with everyone panicked out of their minds as they are, sicher ist sicher (better to be safe than sorry).

The German Chancellor, who indicated that some plants could be closed faster than expected, said that “everything will be put under review.”

The Next Human Chain (Reaction)

March 14, 2011 By in Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , Leave a comment

When in doubt, get hysterical. Germans are leaving Japan faster than you can say “the shinto has hit the fan.”

Is the situation in Japan a cause for concern? It most certainly is. But we are what we eat in the end, aren’t we? Maybe it’s just me, but if I watch an hour of BBC World coverage on the nuclear power plant situation in Japan, for instance, and then switch over to the German ARD coverage of it, I feel as if I’m now watching coverage from another planet.

BBC: The Japanese seem to be getting a grip on the situation.
ARD: Oh my God we’re all going to die!

And has anyone stopped to notice how stoic and remarkably calm the Japanese are in dealing with all of this?

No matter. Just keep eating whatever it is you eat and we’ll all see how the reporting looks next week. Not that anyone will notice or care or anything, but still.

Nur für die Mitarbeiter am Flughafen scheint die Welt nicht Kopf zu stehen. Sie betreuen lächelnd ihre Kunden, leihen spontan Stifte aus, halten hinter dem Schalter ein Schwätzchen.