German Of The Day: Totgesagte Leben Länger

That means “those declared dead live longer” or there’s life in the old dog yet.

Merkel

Sure, Angela Merkel’s approval rating has long become a disapproval rating and nearly half of Germans polled would like to see her step down now but what does that have to do with anything? There is no direct balloting for the office of Chancellor or they would have voted her out of office years ago. The parliamentary majority decides. And harmless little old Angela Merkel has spent years bumping off anyone in her party who could even remotely pose a threat to her position as boss lady. Nope, things will just keep plugging along, one painful step in the wrong direction after the other. Same procedure as last year, Miss Sophie? Same procedure as every year, James.

By the way, did you know that most great catastrophes don’t just happen suddenly, out of nowhere and overnight? They usually result after a long accumulation of smaller mishaps, mistakes and poor decisions has taken place.

Berlin. Angesichts der aktuellen Regierungskrise um die Asylpolitik ist fast jeder zweite Deutsche für eine Ablösung von Bundeskanzlerin Angela Merkel. In einer Umfrage des Meinungsforschungsinstituts YouGov sprachen sich 43 Prozent dafür aus, dass Merkel zurücktritt und ihr Amt an einen Nachfolger oder eine Nachfolgerin übergibt.

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Crisis? What Crisis?

It’s not like the migrant crisis I singlehandedly caused is a crisis or anything. They just call it that.

Ricin

Or that this so-called migrant crisis I unleashed also caused the surge in populism that is currently surging in Germany. Or that any of these so-called migrants are endangering the German public. They’re not. It’s those yuicky terrorists that came into the country illegally with them. When they came into the country illegally, I mean. What, me worry?

Not Angela Merkel. She’s the Blob. Changes form at will. And nobody can lift her up out of that chair. Right?

Not even 100 days after she negotiated her way to a fourth term as German leader, Angela Merkel is mired in a political crisis that underscores Europe’s divisions over immigration amid a surge in populism.

Das in Köln sichergestellte Rizin hätte für Hunderte toxische Dosen gereicht. Verfassungsschutzpräsident Maaßen nimmt an, dass mit dem Gift ein Anschlag geplant war.

Beware Of Low-Flying Objects

Like Germany’s SPD.

Nahles

Their new boss lady, Andrea Nahles, has brought them down to an altitude of 17 percent – that’s the percentage of the German electorate that is still prepared to vote for them.

But watch it, folks. They’re tricky. I think it’s intentional. How could you sink this low if it wasn’t on purpose? And once they get under the radar like that they can turn up anywhere and start strafing you when you least expect. You know, with new money resdistribution plans or other social justice air warrior maneuvers? Or maybe just crash and burn altogether. Hard to say for sure. Either way it’s only only going to get uglier.

Nach dem RTL/n-tv-Trendbarometer verliert die SPD im Vergleich zur Vorwoche und erreicht nur noch 17 Prozent. Alle anderen Parteien blieben bei ihren Werten. Die Union liegt demnach bei 34 Prozent, die Grünen bei 13, die AfD bei zwölf, die Linken bei zehn und die FDP bei neun Prozent.

Perfect For The Job

As head of a “worker’s” party like Germany’s SPD, I mean: Somebody who has never worked a day in her life.

Nahles

Folks like that know best how to distribute/redistribute other people’s money. I guess this election means that the SPD commrades want to stretch out their party’s long and excruciating terminal illness for as long as they possibly can. Good choice, workers. She is clearly the best man for the job.

Andrea Nahles has become the first woman to lead Germany’s Social Democrats — though by a disappointing margin of votes…

After garnering a meager 66.35 percent of delegate support at a special conference in the western German city of Wiesbaden on Sunday, Andrea Nahles takes over a Social Democratic Party (SPD) in an unprecedented crisis.

Scarcely a year ago, SPD delegates had unanimously elected Martin Schulz, the longtime president of the European Parliament, as party leader and chancellor candidate. The result was a historic national electoral debacle against Angela Merkel’s Christian Democrats (CDU), leaving the SPD deeply divided over policy and personnel.

After initial refusals, party leaders decided to extend the grand coalition with Merkel’s CDU and Bavaria’s Christian Social Union, which allies with the chancellor’s conservatives. Nahles’ job is to remake and re-energize the SPD while ensuring that its cabinet ministers can do their jobs with minimum of interference by fellow Social Democrats.

“Solidarity is one of the main things missing in this globalized, neoliberal turbocharged world.”

If The Deutsche Post Does It It’s Different

As usual, German Scheiße doesn’t stink.

Deutsche Post

When it comes to data mining = Cambridge Analytica = Facebook = US-Amerika, we’re talking pure evil. The Deutsche Post, on the other hand, is the Deutsche Post so it ain’t no big deal – when they do the same thing. The outrage hält sich in Grenzen (is kept within limits).

Deutsche Post sold client microtargeting data to the Christian Democrats and Free Democrats before the 2017 elections. Is this a scandal along the lines of Cambridge Analytica in the US? That depends on whom you ask.

“German ‘data-driven’ canvassing cannot be compared with the highly sophisticated US campaigns, which use reliable data, experimental findings and data modeling to identify individual voter targets.”

German Of The Day: Aneinander vorbeireden

That means to talk at cross purposes. In this case when German politicians use the same word in different ways – gehören (meaning both to belong to and ought to belong to).

Islam

In an interview with the German newspaper BILD Seehofer said: “Islam is not a part of Germany. Germany has been influenced by Christianity. This includes free Sundays, church holidays and rituals such as Easter, Pentecost and Christmas. However, the Muslims living in Germany obviously do belong to Germany.”

This statement conflicted with the position of German Chancellor Angela Merkel. Merkel said, even though Germany has been influenced mainly by Christianity and Judaism, there are more than four million Muslims in the country, they “belong to Germany and so does their religion.”

Hey, depending upon how you look at it, Germany does not belong to Germany. Neither does Christianity belong to Germany. Let’s not even start with Judaism. So I think Horst Seehofer is right on the money when he says that Islam does not belong to Germany, either. What’s the big deal? We’re all not in this together, folks.

Da muss man schon präzise sagen, was mit dem Ausdruck “gehört” eigentlich gemeint sein soll. Das kann man ja als schlichte Bestandsaufnahme oder Feststellung meinen: Man gehört zu einer bestimmten Familie oder einem Verein an. Man kann es aber auch so verstehen wie bei der Formulierung: Kinder gehören zeitig ins Bett. Dann bekommt die Aussage eine Sollens-Komponente und erhält eine ganz andere Bedeutung. Und drittens könnte die Frage angesprochen sein, ob der Islam die Bundesrepublik Deutschland in ähnlicher Weise geprägt hat wie das Christentum. Je nachdem, mit welchem Akzent man das Wort “gehört” verwendet, bekommt dieser Satz einen anderen Sinn. Diese Unterschiede werden in der politischen Diskussion leider nicht beachtet, und deswegen redet man munter aneinander vorbei. Das ist vorhersehbar und langweilig.

Did You Notice That Germany Didn’t Have A Government For The Past 169 Days?

Me, neither. Nobody else over here did, either.

Groko

That just goes to show you how, uh, desperately needed this latest GroKo government is.

Chancellor Angela Merkel and her partners met to formally sign their agreement on a new “grand coalition” government on Monday and admitted it was a political necessity, not a “love match”.

„Wir haben uns sehr viel vorgenommen und es ist Zeit auch mit der Arbeit zu beginnen.”

PS: I think I’ve finally figured out why Angela Merkel has been behaving so strangely these past few years. She smokes fish. And with Vlad Putin, of all people.

Enthusiasm?

Where’s the enthusiasm? That’s what Spiegel Online asks regarding Germany’s next coming grand coalition government.

Enthusiasm

I know that’s not a serious question but how could there possibly be any enthusiasm for the forming of a government that the electorate expressly voted out of office just a few months previously? Everybody but Merkel & Co. are depressed about this depressing matter and are going to stay that way until the new GroKo government – that isn’t even in power yet – finally exits the political stage  for good.

Imagine that. You aren’t even in office yet and everybody already hates you. That’s never happened before, right?

With the Social Democrats having approved a new coalition with Chancellor Angela Merkel, Germany finally has a government. Despite the breakthrough, however, enthusiasm is in short supply in Berlin.

German Of The Day: Fußvolk

That means foot soldiers, as in rank and file. And special thanks need to go out to the SPD’s Fußvolk today.SPD

Thanks for nothing. You failed. First make a lot of noise as if you will vote down Merkel’s latest grand coalition government plans so you can take your rightful place in the opposition instead (where you belong – your forty years in the desert) and then cave in to your worthless party leadership and give your blessing after all.

Not that anyone has ever taken your bitching and moaning about “showing those folks up there” all that seriously in the first place, nobody without a party membership card will ever believe a word of it again. You had your chance to do something and you blew it. You have the leadership you deserve. Pitiful.

SPD-Mitglieder stimmen zu 66 Prozent für GroKo-Neuauflage.

SPD Outrage…

Is the most outrageous kind of outrage there is around here. Take this one: Outrage about the unacceptably high number of temp employment contracts in Germany today. We’ll see to it that these poor people get real jobs!

SPD

Fine. Run with it. So that’s why the SPD is making such a big noise about alleviating this scourge as soon as the next GroKo (with SPD participation) is finally in power.

The only dumb thing here is that they wouldn’t have to wait that long if they didn’t want to. It turns out that the folks over at the SPD-run Ministry for Family Affairs, Senior Citizens, Women and Youth, for instance, have hired way too many of these poor defenseless temp employees themselves. They’re not willing to give these people permanent contracts, however. This is because… Because why anyway? And there we have it again, folks: The SPD redistributor world vs. the real finite resources world.

Die SPD hat im Koalitionsvertrag einen Kompromiss zu sachgrundlosen Befristungen ausgehandelt. Tatsächlich ist die Praxis aber auch in Bundesministerien gängig.