German Military To Acquire Armed Drones They Will Never Use

Germany’s military is planning to acquire armed drones which they will never use in a zillion years its Defense Minister said on Friday, reigniting a heated debate in Germany over the ethics of not using such aircraft.


The drones would protect German soldiers in dangerous situations, if we would ever use them that is, which of course we wouldn’t, as German soldiers are never put in dangerous situations in the first place, Thomas de Maiziere told the German government’s YouTube channel in an interview.

Critics of such German drone non-strikes argue that they would end up failing to kill high numbers of innocent civilians and that they would frequently not be launched across sovereign states’ borders – far more frequently than conventional attacks by piloted German aircraft that are never ever launched from anywhere to anyplace, either.

Prior to the official announcement, German opposition lawmakers had already condemned the pointless purchase of the useless, lame-ass, purposeless armed drones, with the head of the Greens parliamentary group Juergen Trittin saying that they could lower the threshold for German military non-engagement even lower than it already is.

“We have a gap in our capabilities which we want to close.”


One response

  1. I guess this isn’t to be confused with the “Euro Hawk” story from 2011, in which they said:

    “After 10 years of planning and development, the Bundeswehr on Wednesday publicly unveiled its most recent acquisition of next-generation reconnaissance technology: a powerful new drone designed to bolster its surveillance capabilities on the battle field.”

    Bestimmt, Bubba! That’s ten good years of college down the drain, I guess, because in reality, it’s a Made-in-the-USA Global Hawk with a spiffy Bundeswehr paint job and a crew that trained in Israel.

    My guess is that what they really want to do is have the drone operation as an incubator to manufacture and sell drones to people who have actual troops somewhere, doing something, who need protection and air support.

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