“It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.”
Germans Are Going Off Beer. That’s Forcing Brewers to Adapt or Go Bust.
More young people are steering clear of alcohol. The deepening cultural shift has spawned an epidemic of brewery closures.
Alcohol consumption in Germany has been sliding for decades. But the sudden, accelerating drop has caught brewers and bar owners by surprise. Out of approximately 1,500 breweries in Germany, more than 50 have closed in the past year.
Ig Nobel prize for study showing that drunk Germans speak Dutch better than sober ones – Dutch Courage can help you speak a foreign language, according to a study by Dutch, English, and German researchers that was awarded an Ig Nobel prize on Thursday. They showed that alcohol consumption sometimes improves a person’s ability to speak a foreign language. “We made an important discovery. Drunk Germans usually pronounce Dutch better than sober Germans.”
Germans battle in traditional “pull my finger” competition – Last Sunday in Bernbeuren, Germany, the lively tradition of “fingerhakeln” took center stage in a beer tent. In this unique sport, 150 men, decked out in traditional Bavarian attire, faced off by hooking their middle fingers through a leather loop and trying to yank each other across the table.
It’s like a high stakes version of “pull my finger,” popular in southern Germany and Austria. And it requires incredible strength—sometimes even leading to dislocated fingers!
It’s achievements like these that will silence the critics.
Germans beat record beer drinking session – More than 40 Germans from a gun club have smashed a drinking record in the island of Mallorca this week.
The group downed 1,330 2ooml glases of beer in a bar in Playa de Palma, meaning more than 10 pints were sunk per person on the group, or 5.8 litres of beer.
This epic session of drinking took 8 hours with the challenge beginning at around 11am and finishing at 7pm last Saturday.
German of the day: Tradition. That means tradition.
“The Führer gave a holiday to any woman who bore at least one child, the men he sent to the front! What an asshole, we see yet again.
The man had to conquer Father’s Day laboriously himself. His choice fell on Ascension Day, a movable fest, lying around quite meaningless in the calendar anyway. And lo and behold, the choice was good! Outside it’s already quite warm and the annoying relatives haven’t taken over your place like they do during Christmas.
Now all that was left to do was fill the event with content. The choice fell on a classic of male leisure activity: DRINK UNTIL YOUR PUKE TASTES SOUR! In addition, howl around like an idiot, piss everywhere and tell dirty jokes. Virtually paradise on Earth, in other words.
Aware of being the stronger of the sexes, the man can also afford to run around dressed like a complete dumbass. He doesn’t get gussied up on his holiday like his haughty wife does on hers, oh no, he puts a buffoon’s hat on his red beet head, wears rolled up corduroy pants and screws a bicycle bell on his walking stick. Dressed like that, anyone can easily see that he’s been transformed into a complete idiot while he and his fellow idiot companions stagger through the forest like containers for Pawian shit.
But because a man is a man, he needs a task. In this case: Pulling a little wooden wagen. On it stands the fuel for the drunkard horde: 50 liters of Pils, 10 bottles of Appelkorn and 30 rubbers, still originally packed from the previous year.
By noon, the weakest are already beginning to flounder, the green slime oozing out of a body orifice that once was called the mouth. All the wagen wheel nuts are loose and the only thing that keeps them going is their sense of duty. That is, to drain the last 20 beers down their swollen gorges.
The greatest joy still awaits the man at the end of Father’s Day: Call home to have his battle axe pick him up from the jungle, drool all over her new dress while she carries him in to dump him on the sofa, and throw the puke bucket at the stupid cat.
Because this is the ONLY day of the year where father belongs to himself. And the rest have to shut their traps!”
German inflation levels exceed 3% for first time since 2008 – It’s the first time since the 2008 global financial crash that inflation in Germany has reached such levels.
German beer sales in this year’s first half were 2.7% lower than a year earlier, dragged lower by closures of bars and restaurants that stretched through winter and into spring, official data showed Friday.
It’s your typical German scorched-earth strategy. Or scorched-throat stategy, in this case.
And drinking alcohol would only lead the Taliban to commit violence or something.
Germany to ship army beer home from Afghanistan – Germany has announced it will fly more than 22,500 litres of beer home from Afghanistan, as Nato forces prepare to withdraw.
Bavarians were able to enjoy a tall beer in the spring sun Monday in several areas, as some outdoor beer gardens reopened in the southern German state.
Bavaria had an overall seven-day average rate of increase of 119.5 new cases of COVID-19 per 100,000 people, but areas below 100 cases per 100,000 were allowed to reopen their iconic beer gardens.
And no Wiesn-Madl? Now we know this is getting serious, folks.
Germany cancels Oktoberfest beer festival due to coronavirus – Germany’s Oktoberfest, the world’s largest folk festival, where revellers from all over the world gather to swig large quantities of beer, has been cancelled due to the coronavirus crisis, the southern state of Bavaria said on Tuesday.
Observing Hermann 