If Germans got much greener…

March 28, 2011 By Hermann Observer in Helections, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Greens, Humor, Japan, Nuclear power, Satire 1 Comment

They would start blending in with the leaves and the flowers here.

Green? They call their bicycles recycles here.

Table legs sprout roots here, it’s that green.

We’re talking green. One guy I know named his kid Kyoto.

Some folks are so green that they carry a tree around with them at all times for optimum air quality.

And German businesses aren’t much better these days. Some have turned so green that employees hug their corporate offices.

Green? They are so green that the very thought of unsorted garbage landing in a landfill makes them turn red.

Logic in the Time of Hysteria

March 27, 2011 By Hermann Observer in Helections, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Satire 6 Comments

What is the connection between a 9.0 earthquake that hits Japan and damages a nuclear power plant there and the nuclear power plants operating in Germany?

There isn’t one. But there doesn’t have to be one once the hysteria hits the fan.

Angie Merkel could have tried sticking to her guns and not playing to the crowd like she did but the result would have probably been the same.

Pech gehabt (tough luck).

German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s Christian Democrats are set to lose the key state of Baden-Wuerttemberg after six decades, exit polls suggest.

Our D-I-V-O-R-C-E

March 24, 2011 By Hermann Observer in Helections, Home Cooking, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, EU, France, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Japan, Satire 2 Comments

Becomes final today. Me and little Sar-ko-sy will be goin’ away…

So much for France and Germany as the inseparable couple at the heart of Europe.

The issue here is not direct German military participation. Everyone would have understood if that was not possible. But how could Germany not support a UN resolution backed by its principal European partners, the United States and the Arab League?

Like so many contemporary European politicians, they (in the German government) follow rather than lead public opinion.

“We calculated the risk. If we see that three days after this intervention began, the Arab League already criticises [it], I think we had good reasons.” While French and British pilots risk their lives in action, the German foreign minister is virtually encouraging the Arab League to make further criticism.

Latest Angst Update:
++ Ticker Ticker++Several German container shipping companies have stopped going to eastern Japanese ports including Tokyo for the time being amid fears of radiation++ Ticker Ticker ++Fukushima radiation detected in Germany!!!

And thanks for this cool Angst Republic link, A.K.

A Permanent Security Council Seat For Germany?

March 22, 2011 By Hermann Observer in Helections, Helplessness, History Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Libya, Satire, Security Council, UN 1 Comment

Let’s vote.

“Germany has lost its credibility in the United Nations and in the Middle East.”

“Germany has turned the idea of a unified European Union foreign policy into a farce.”

“Germany’s hopes for a permanent Security Council seat can be buried. Even the idea of an EU seat is damaged.”

“I don’t know what the German foreign minister was thinking, but (the abstention) doesn’t have much in common with a values-driven foreign policy nor with German and European Union interests.”

“German hopes for a permanent seat on the Security Council have been permanently dashed and one is now fearful of Europe’s future.”

“Why is it so difficult for us in Germany to realize that we have to help the rebels in Libya, primarily because a bloodbath is looming in Benghazi?”

“Everyone has seen pictures of the Warsaw ghetto. Everyone knows what happens when an army takes over a city. That’s why all parties in France, including on the left, were in favor of a military intervention in Libya. In Germany, that didn’t happen.”

“The opposition to our closest partner France is a break with all constants of German foreign policy since 1949.”

“I have nothing but shame for the failure of our government.”

“The reform of the United Nations Security Council remains a major goal for the German government. The German government’s willingness to shoulder more responsibility within the framework of such reform is unchanged.”

Minority Report

July 14, 2010 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helections, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Politics, Satire, SPD 4 Comments

Toleration?

Here’s how you form coalition governments if you’re the SPD in North Rhine-Westphalia (they’ve done this before): First of all, don’t win the election. Then, form a minority government with the Greens which is “tolerated” by the Left Party.

And here’s how the toleration part works: The Left Party quietly qets a whole lot more of what it wants than what it deserves by discretely making agreements with the coaltion partners behind the scenes while boldly threatening to stop its toleration and thus them (the coalition partners) dead in their tracks. Then, in one or two or however many years it takes, the voters get grossed out about the policies they didn’t really support or vote for in the first place, hold the coaltion partners accountable for the mess, vote them out, and the Left Party comes strolling out of the mess and into the opposition smelling like a rose. You know, as in “We weren’t in the government!”