More Like A Stepfather

Who beat you like a red-headed stepchild.

For Germans, Losing the U.S. to Trump Is Like Losing a Father – The 30th-anniversary celebration of the Berlin Wall’s collapse comes with grief over the end of a special relationship.

Trump

I don’t know if I can hold back the tears but give me a second or two. There. I’m much better now. Thanks. But this massive output of cheap emotion has a heavy taste of déjà-vu in it for me, folks. The Germans already had their hearts broken and lost their special relationship back with W., didn’t they? And we don’t even want to talk about how heartbroken they were with Ronald Reagan HIMSELF. They don’t even want to have to think about him today. Some thirty years later. You know, thirty years after he made possible the fall of the Berlin Wall? Wait a minute. I’m chocking up again…

Berlin gets unwanted Ronald Reagan statue – Ronald Reagan is already an honorary citizen of Berlin, so city authorities have always deemed a statue inappropriate. Nonetheless, a bronze replica of the former president is set to be inaugurated at the US Embassy.

Reagan

Why Weren’t These Women In The Safety Area?

Where they belong, I mean. Unverantwörtlich (irresponsible) of them, I find.

Berlin

Several clearly intoxicated women ventured out of Berlin’s new “safety area” during New Year’s Eve celebrations last night and were promptly sexually assaulted by those for whom the safety area had originally been set up to protect. Or at least I assume that’s why the thing had been set up. This led to the arrest of several of these poor blameless victim types by undercover cops. Don’t these women ever think about the consequences of their actions?

In what kind of a dream world are you living in, girls? Safety areas are the latest craze in German cities and everybody knows the rules. If you don’t, go get informed already. Get with the plan and stop being a public nuisance.

Auch zwei Jahre nach den Silvester-Übergriffen in Köln ist die Angst vor sexueller Gewalt bei den Feierlichkeiten groß. Berlin richtet nun eine Schutzzone für Frauen ein. Auch andere Städte haben ihr Sicherheitskonzept angepasst.

Do They Have A Marxist-Leninist Animal Protection Party, Too?

They are an endangered species, after all. Maybe not in Berlin. But everywhere else they are – aren’t they?

Party

German political parties are not as boring as you think they are. They are much more boring than you can possibly imagine. But some of them are also just plain wacky. Wacky and boring. It’s a new level of boring. Wacky-boring, I guess.  I can’t say if it’s higher or lower but it’s a new level.

Take the V-Partei³, for instance. Please. Voters almost across the board can vote for the V-Partei³ (the V-cubed party) – the party for “Veränderung” (“change” in English), Vegetarians and Vegans. Founded in 2016 at the Veggieworld trade fair in Munich, the party has about 1,200 members. By 2030, they’d like to see all butchers go out of business, true to their motto: “We love life.”

Germany’s election campaign is a snooze—just the way Merkel likes it.