Even Horses Are Snowflakes These Days

After complaining to authorities about the oppressive environment and how demanding participating in the Olympics has become, I assume, a German horse has had his coach suspended for horse-o-phobic behavior.

A German coach at the Tokyo Olympics was suspended Saturday after being filmed hitting an uncooperative horse during the women’s modern pentathlon competition.

TV footage showed Kim Raisner leaning over a fence to strike the horse Saint Boy, which refused to jump the fences in the show jumping round on Friday. That cost German athlete Annika Schleu a chance of winning the gold medal.

Hobby Dope?

But he’s a full-time fool at his day job, I bet.


German doctor accused of masterminding network admits to ‘hobby’ doping – A German doctor accused of masterminding an international blood-doping network dismantled last year admitted on Tuesday to helping athletes undergo transfusions to boost performance.

In a statement read by his lawyers, sports physician Mark Schmidt said he had started to aid individuals in 2012 but refrained from disclosing specific names.

He claimed he made no financial profit from the process but asked for 5,000 euros ($5,852) a year for his services and also asked for result-based bonuses.

“In the end I never made money from it, I always saw it as a hobby.”

Real American Boys

Thank you, Dirk, Uwe and Detlef!


Watching Dirk run/stumble around the American Airlines Center on Friday night against Memphis in a glorified preseason game was bittersweet, and an ideal reminder there is no Dirk without the two Germans who came long before him.

Mavericks fans, when you thank Dirk, be sure to nod and clap for Uwe Blab and Detlef Schrempf. That duo didn’t make Dirk, but they made what he did possible.

“When I was a kid growing up in Germany, I was a complete outcast,” said Blab, who is 57 and lives in Dripping Springs and works in Austin. “I was 7-foot-2, 180 pounds. I was a freak. No girls. Nothing. Many negative comments, and just this general attitude when you walked into a place. I came to America, and it was, ‘Ohhhhhhh — look at that guy.’ I had a new life here. I was totally accepted.”

German Team Training With Dummies

They are also training with some giant inflatable roly-poly-like figures, too.


Injuries have depleted Germany’s defence in such a way that their opening match against Portugal may see four central defenders in the starting lineup, with two of them out of position and two who have rarely played together.

“We do have a little problem there.”

Sex, Smokes, Alcohol…

More sex, and then maybe some soccer at one point.

Yup, it’s time for Euro 2012. And the German team is ready to get it on, so-to-speak. German Manager Joachim Löw is taking a more relaxed approach to his squad this time around as his players will be allowed to “drink, smoke, tweet and mix with their girlfriends” during the Euro 2012 competition.

But he is still a German, after all, so Ordnung muss sein (it must be orderly). Conjugal visits in the team hotel will be limited to specific times.

Germany may not win Euro 2012, but they’ll have the most fun there.