German Of The Day: Bildungsurlaub

That means educational or vocational training leave. You know, like that yoga course you took for your job?

Yoga

What? Your boss freaked out at the suggestion? Well, everybody does it here in Berlin. Yoga to go with the times, people.

A yoga course can be considered vocational training, a Berlin court has ruled, paving the way to doing the “Downward-facing Dog” or “Greet the Sun” on company time in Germany’s capital.

The state labour court for Berlin-Brandenburg has ruled a worker has the right to paid leave so they can attend a five-day adult education course entitled “Yoga I – successful and relaxed at work with yoga and meditation”.

The judge ruled that under Berlin’s Educational Leave Act, even a yoga course fulfills the far-reaching criteria of “professional development” which would promote an individual’s “adaptability and self-assertion”.

“Yoga I – erfolgreich und entspannt im Beruf mit Yoga und Meditation.”

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10 Years Of College Down The Drain

I mean 10 years of hilarious German-Afghan Police Academy high jinks!

High jinks

German officials have been training police in Afghanistan for a decade, but a visit to their training center in Mazar-e-Sharif creates major doubts about the effectiveness of the mission. Afghan police remain poorly prepared to tackle the mighty challenges they will face as Western forces withdraw. 

“What we want to achieve with the recruits is a change in mentality,” says a German instructor. “More team spirit, a better sense of community, more loyalty. More soccer, less buzkashi*.”

*Buzkashi is the Afghan national sport and is a game in which horsemen battle over a goat carcass.

Sex, Smokes, Alcohol…

More sex, and then maybe some soccer at one point.

Yup, it’s time for Euro 2012. And the German team is ready to get it on, so-to-speak. German Manager Joachim Löw is taking a more relaxed approach to his squad this time around as his players will be allowed to “drink, smoke, tweet and mix with their girlfriends” during the Euro 2012 competition.

But he is still a German, after all, so Ordnung muss sein (it must be orderly). Conjugal visits in the team hotel will be limited to specific times.

Germany may not win Euro 2012, but they’ll have the most fun there.

Too hot in Afghanistan right now

Ich kann so nicht arbeiten! I just can’t work under these conditions!

This just keeps getting better, people. Now even Northern Afghanistan is too dangerous for the Germans. Too dangerous to train Afghan police, that is. I mean it’s not like anybody’s taking part in any of the fighting going on down south at the moment or anything.

SPD Politicians are serously proposing that the few police trainers Germany is currently utilizing to train Afghan police (wow, they’re actually going to increase that number from 120 to 150) do the training in a more peaceful working environment. Up here in Germany, that is.

Taliban attacks in Germany are acceptably low at the moment and will allow German police trainers to concentrate more fully on their work and maybe even actually start getting a few Afghans through their rigorously thorough and near-never-ending training program. Already.

Angesichts der Sicherheitslage am Hindukusch wird diskutiert, wie die Arbeit der deutschen Polizisten mit der größtmöglichen Sicherheit ablaufen kann.