German Of The Day: Gaslobbyist

That means gas lobbyist.

Germany to close Schroeder’s office in repudiation of ex-chancellor – Gerhard Schroeder’s publicly funded office is to be closed and its remaining staff reallocated amid mounting dismay at the former German chancellor’s refusal to distance himself from Russian President Vladimir Putin.

Gerhard Schröder to lose Bundestag office this week. The SPD, the Greens and the FDP want to strip the former chancellor (SPD) of some privileges immediately: In a draft for the budget committee, he will be deprived of offices and staff.

He’s A Green Economy Minister

So, of course “Germany Can Survive Without Russian Gas.”

The Greens think Germans should do without any form of gas, other than the kind you get from being a vegatarian. They don’t think Germans need any of that yucky energy and industry stuff at all, in fact. Just sunshine, wind, tweeting birds and apple trees. And a treehouse for everyone in the forest. And butterlies. And a cozy campfire every once in a while. But not too many of those because of the CO2.

Economy Minister: Germany Can Survive Without Russian Gas – Germany will be able to withstand a halt of Russian natural gas supplies as long as it manages to fill up its gas storage, Economy Minister Robert Habeck told German media this week.

In an interview with WirtschaftsWoche cited by Bloomberg, Habeck explained that the country would be able to weather the effects of a potential suspension of gas supplies from Russia under three conditions: that it fills up its gas storage facilities before the next heating season begins, that it finishes adding its planned LNG import capacity, and that Germans reduce their energy consumption.

Smell That Coffee

Suddenly, for some odd reason, “LNG” is no longer a dirty word/acronym in German anymore. It used to mean “dirty, awful US-Amerikan fracking gas.”

It looks like they changed that definition recently so it probably won’t be long before the Germans will be explaining to the rest of the world how to do LNG the right way.

The Cabinet approves bill to speed up construction of LNG terminals – The Cabinet on Tuesday approved a bill to speed up the construction of floating and fixed LNG terminals and the pipelines needed to connect them to the gas grid. The Bundestag and Bundesrat still have to approve it.

Is 55% Dependency?

55% percent of your energy needs coming from Russia?

Might be. But don’t worry for Germany. The government has “a plan” if Putin turns off the supply. And the government, as you know, is from the government and they’re here to help. Just like they helped you get into this mess in the first place.

German officials are quietly preparing for any sudden halt in Russian gas supplies with an emergency package that could include taking control of critical firms.

The preparations being led by the Ministry for Economic Affairs show the heightened state of alert about supplies of the gas that powers Europe’s biggest economy and is critical for the production of steel, plastics and cars.

Russian gas accounted for 55% of Germany’s imports last year and Berlin has come under pressure to unwind a business relationship that critics says is helping to fund Russia’s war in Ukraine.

German Of The Day: Beleidigte Leberwurst

Literally: Insulted liverwurst. It means to be offended, to sulk, to be in a huff.

Like German Chancellor Olaf Scholz. He’s an insulted liverwurst and won’t visit Ukraine because Kyiv refused to invite his Parteifreund (fellow SPD party member) and Germany’s head of state, President Frank-Walter Steinmeier.

German opposition leader visits Kyiv, Scholz refuses to go – Germany’s conservative opposition leader has traveled to Kyiv for meetings with Ukrainian officials including President Volodymyr Zelenskyy.

German Of The Day: Bremser

That means brakeman or somebody who drags his feet and won’t get with the plan.

Germany, a world-class Bremser, has now dropped its opposition to an EU ban on Russian oil because, well, 1) they want to improve their image of being a Bremser and 2) they know that this ban won’t happen anyway because Hungary and Slovakia, being even more dependent upon Russian oil than Germany is (which is saying a lot), are being even bigger Bremser than the German Bremser is and for the ban to take place, all 27 EU countries must agree to it.

Two senior ministers in Chancellor Olaf Scholz’s government on Monday said Germany would be ready to back an immediate European Union ban on Russian oil imports, and that Europe’s biggest economy could weather shortages and price hikes.

As Tough As Jell-O

Jermany is.

When it comes to standing up to Vlad Putin himself. Hey, dependency has its price.

German energy firm Uniper ready to meet Russian pay demand – One of Germany’s biggest energy firms has said it is preparing to buy Russian gas using a payment system that critics say will undermine EU sanctions.

Uniper says it will pay in euros which will be converted into roubles, meeting a Kremlin demand for all transactions to be made in the Russian currency.

Other European energy firms are reportedly preparing to do the same amid concerns about supply cuts.

It’s Magic!

Not black magic. Green magic.

Why didn’t anybody think of doing this before? Then all this embarrassing talk about Germany being dependent on Russia for it’s energy needs (50%) wouldn’t have been necessary.

Germany aims to find alternative to Russian oil within days – Germany hopes to find a way within days to replace Russian oil with supplies from other sources, Economy Minister Robert Habeck (Greens) said on Tuesday, adding that Germany could then cope with an EU embargo on Russian oil imports.

German Of The Day: Unverbesserlich

That means incorrigible, unreformable, incurable, dyed-in-the-wool.

Take Gazprom Gerd, for instance. Please. The Germans have pretended to be upset by his post-chancellorship antics but have secretely admired him all along, handling him with kid gloves (anyone who stands up to evil US-Amerika is a hero here). Now, with this little Ukraine thing going on, the bill finally has to be paid and everyone’s upset and wondering how they got here. Will there be consequeces for him? Of course not. Gazprom Gerd is Gazprom Gerd, after all.

The former chancellor who became Putin’s man in Germany – On the evening of Dec. 9, 2005, 17 days after Gerhard Schröder left office as chancellor of Germany, he got a call on his cellphone. It was his friend President Vladimir Putin of Russia.

Putin was pressing Schröder to accept an offer to lead the shareholder committee of Nord Stream, a Russian-controlled company in charge of building the first undersea gas pipeline directly connecting Russia and Germany.

“Are you afraid to work for us?” Putin had joked. Schröder might well have been, given the appearance of possible impropriety; the pipeline he was now being asked to head had been agreed to in the final weeks of his chancellorship, with his strong support.

He took the job anyway.

Seventeen years later, the former chancellor, who recounted the events himself in a pair of rare interviews, remains as defiant as ever.

“Ill-Prepared?”

That’s the nice word for it.

Take Berlin, for instance. Practically all of it’s energy is produced using Russian gas. It took the German government(s) many, many years of hard work and the steadfast disregard of warnings from its partners in the West to become this dependent on Russian gas, coal and oil (50%). Now deal with it. Too bad I’m going to have to live/freeze through it, though. Stock up on warm clothing for next winter while the supplies still last, people!

What if the Gas Is Cut Off? – German Industry Prepares for Worst-Case Scenario – German industry and the government in Berlin are ill-prepared for a possible halt in supplies of natural gas from Russia. A new emergency plan is being developed to prevent an economic meltdown if deliveries cease.