Smart Move

I guess. German city introduces face masks for shoppers as corona cases rise.

Jena

It’s just that the German government doesn’t have any face masks for the population. Nor does German industry. They shipped them all off to China as the pandemic began. No joke. Now Germans are forced to either make their face masks themselves or pay ridiculous prices for the few that are available until industrial production gets back up to speed again. Thank goodness for government planning.

The city of Jena in eastern Germany has decided to make people wear face masks when shopping or traveling by public transport, stepping up efforts to slow the spread of the coronavirus and becoming the first city in the country to introduce the measure.

Split Personality

German style (in the time of coronavirus). On the one hand, Germans have been asked to stay home and avoid contact with one another at least until 20 April.

Split

On the other hand, the police were called out hundreds of times during the weekend as residents flouted restrictions aimed at stemming the spread of coronavirus.

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t?

‘Absolute madness’: Outrage as crowds flout Germany’s coronavirus rules.

800 Cruise Ship Passengers To Be Flown To Germany

From Australia. But it won’t be on Merkel One.

Germany will soon receive its first aircraft to ferry around the German head of state and other high-level officials, reports Live and Let’s Fly. The aircraft, an Airbus A350-900, has just completed its fourth test flight out of Airbus facilities in Toulouse, France.

One Hand Sanitizer On The Rocks, Please

A German distillery is giving away pure alcohol it normally uses to make liquor to hospitals and clinics desperate for disinfectants now in short supply due to the coronavirus outbreak.

Sanitizer

Germans have been stockpiling disinfectants as well as soap, toilet paper and pasta since early March in anticipation of stricter movement restrictions to slow the spread of the virus, ignoring politicians’ reassurances that supplies are secure…

“This should last until the middle of the week and after that we will run out of stock.”

But Have They Checked Her For Mad Cow Disease?

Angela Merkel negative for coronavirus after first test, with more to come.

Mad Cow

Merkel went into quarantine at home on Sunday evening after being informed that a doctor who had administered a vaccination to her had tested positive for the new coronavirus. She received the precautionary vaccination against pneumococcal infection on Friday.

Three’s A Crowd

And we don’t like crowds. You’re under arrest.

Restrictions

Has Germany imposed a total curfew? No. But more than two people can’t be outside together — unless they’re part of the same household. Going for a walk with a friend is fine, even if you don’t live with them, but groups of three or more are forbidden unless you’re family or roommates. A minimum distance of “at least 1.5 meters (5 feet), or better yet 2 meters” should be maintained whenever possible, Chancellor Angela Merkel said as she announced the new measures on Sunday.

“Keine Empfehlungen, sondern Regeln.”

Other Than Bars…

Clubs, discotheques, theaters, opera houses, museums, casinos, trade fairs, zoos, arcades, betting offices, brothels, churches and fifty or sixty other places for social and anti-social interaction, lots of other stuff in Germany is still open. Sort of. For now.

Corona

Corona ain’t no big deal here either.

Die Bundesregierung vereinbarte am Montag mit den Ministerpräsidenten der Länder, dass zahlreiche Geschäfte und Einrichtungen geschlossen werden sollen.

But Don’t Panic

When it comes to the coronavirus, Angela Merkel tells her fellow Germans.

Merkel

The population has no immunity, she points out. There is no therapy. 60 to 70% of you will be infected with it. BUT DON’T PANIC!!!

So, there. I said it. Now it’s back to the bunker for me. You promised.

The German daily Bild recently slammed her for what it called “the corona chaos,” claiming “No appearances, no speech, no leadership in the crisis.”

Czech Prime Minister Andrej Babis, Reuters reported, was later asked about Merkel’s comments. “I don’t want to comment on the situation in Germany, although I believe that such statements rather cause panic,” he said. “In any case, we have adopted strong measures for such worst-case scenarios to be out of the question.”

Welcome To Corona Queen!

Would you like Jumbo Flu Fries with your Outbreak Burger?

Corona

German hospital launches drive-thru coronavirus testing – Doctors at the local hospital in the small German town of Gross-Gerau launched the drive-thru last week as a quick, creative way to screen people for the deadly bug and minimize exposure for medical staff and patients.

“Extraordinary times call for extraordinary solutions.”

German Of The Day: Hamsterschlacht

You already know about Hamsterkauf (panic buying). Now the Germans have upped the ante and are doing “the battle of the hamsters.”

Hamsterschlacht

Aldi customers are getting up early in the morning to get in line so they can fight each other  to purchase disinfectant. Only three products per customer may be purchased, however (doesn’t sound like much of a hamster battle to me). Everybody’s doing it these days. It’s that coronavirus kinda feeling!

Sie stehen dicht an dicht. Dutzende Kunden warten morgens an einer Aldi-Filiale auf die Eröffnung des Ladens. Der Grund: Desinfektionsmittel!