German of the day: “Planetary Health Menüs”

That means, well, I’m not really sure what that means.

I think it means Planet Earth has to go on a diet. Is that how they’re saving it now?

‘People mustn’t feel meat is being taken away’: German hospitals serve planetary health diet.

That’s right. People mustn’t think meat is being taken away just because we’ve taken away the meat. Our meals still meat the minimum daily requirements of… what? Of what we require our patients not to eat.

German of the day: Die Schnauze voll haben

Having the snout full means to be fed up with it, to be sick to death of it.

And the German Greens are filling up everybody’s snouts these days.

Germans Fed Up With Greens as Founding Member Resigns – The aggressive policies of the German Greens have alienated not only many voters in Germany but also their own supporters, including one of the founders of the party who has accused them of pursuing a warmongering foreign policy…

Annalena Baerbock, the young, inexperienced minister of foreign affairs, has promised to introduce a ‘feminist foreign policy,’ but she seems helpless in the face of the momentous challenges posed by the Russian-Ukraine war. The Greens have converted from a ‘pacifist’ party into the most belligerent party of all.

Breaking News: Isaiah, Ezekiel and Jeremiah are now right-wing white supremacists

And I’m not even going to get into the patriarchy part. Old Testament prophets go home!

You can’t make this stuff up, people.

‘We are dealing with fundamentalist rightwingers’: Berlin statues are latest battleground in Germany’s culture wars – Monuments erected on the Stadtschloss are an ‘infiltration’ of the city and its skyline by nationalists, say critics.

“It appears that we are dealing with a targeted infiltration of the Berlin palace by fundamentalist rightwingers who want to turn it into symbol of a Christian and thereby ‘white’ ethnic Germany.”

German of the day: Blitzschnell

That means lightning fast.

Seven seconds? Get outta here.

Germany raise Euro 2024 hopes as Wirtz and Havertz shock France in Lyon – Toni Kroos returned and Florian Wirtz scored the fastest-ever Germany goal as the Euro 2024 hosts defeated France 2-0 in Lyon.

Kroos, coaxed out of international retirement for the upcoming European Championship, wasted no time with a precise pass for Wirtz, who let fly from outside the penalty area to score after seven seconds.

German of the day: Patient*in

Just kidding. That was the German of yesterday. No more “gender star” for you!

It’s Patientin. As in female patient. Maybe it’s even the patient, female or otherwise, who thought up the gender star and all this other nonsense too.

Germany’s Bavaria cracks down on gender-sensitive language – More and more German texts use asterisks, colons and other symbols to make language more inclusive. The conservative government in the southern German state of Bavaria, however, says this trend is driven by ideology.

German of the day: Brandanschlag

That means aerson attack.

The Tree People did it (they’re kind of like the Sand People in Star Wars, only with trees)!

Tesla without electricity is like a… Well, this is what it’s like:

Tesla factory near Berlin evacuated! No power for hours after arson attack. Production at a standstill ++ Bomb searchers move in…

Peaceful protest turns into naked violence! Eco-criminals paralyzed Tesla’s car factory in Grünheide (12,500 employees) with an arson attack on Tuesday morning. The entire factory, the town of Erkner and parts of Berlin are without electricity. Bomb searchers are now moving in. The car factory has been evacuated!

Noblesse oblige

Or Adel verpflichtet in German. You know, the idea that people with a high social class should do things for other people? Like take off their clothes.

German princess strips down for Playboy – Xenia Florence Gabriela Sophie Iris, the Princess of Saxony, is the first aristocrat to pose for Playboy. She is the cover girl for Playboy Germany’s March 2024 issue.

“It’s the first and last time I get naked.”

When in doubt…

Just say no. When not in doubt, sowieso (anyhow).

“Expansion” is a scary word. It sounds too much like growth, increase, prosperity, success. We vote no! Because you can never know, unless it’s no.

Tesla in Germany: Locals vote against factory expansion plan – Residents of Grünheide near Berlin have voted against expansion plans for the large Tesla facility there. But the vote is not binding and local authorities can still decide. Turnout was high, though, indicating interest.

German of the day: Shmues un Vayn

Just kidding. That’s Yiddish.

And that means schmusen und Wein in German. Almost. Schmusen in German means to cuddle. Shmues, however, although taken from schmusen, means schmooze, as in gossip or conversation.

So, German of the day Shmues un Vayn, which is actually Yiddish, means getting together for wine and conversation. I think. Now was that so hard?

You can now hear people speaking Yiddish in bars all over Berlin – A Yiddish conversation group meets biweekly at locations around the city. Other people think they’re speaking Swiss German.

German of the day: Na also, es geht doch

That means, more or less: “Well, what do you know? It’s possible after all.”

Germany hits 2% NATO spending target for first time since end of Cold War – Germany has met a NATO alliance target to spend 2% of its gross domestic product on defence for the first time since the early 1990s, a defence ministry spokesperson said on Wednesday, as spending ramped up after Russia’s invasion of Ukraine in 2022.

The German government is allocating the equivalent of 71.8 billion euros ($76.8 billion) for defence spending in the current year through regular and special budget outlays. However, the sum of its total defence spending is classified.