What’s 40%?

“We’ll just build some more of those solar windmill thingies to compensate and make Germany greener than ever,” an unnamed German Green government minister said. “The rest of the world really marvels at our green energy utopia here, you know,” he added. “They’re like totally green with envy.”

Russia‘s announcement that it would reduce natural gas flows through a key European pipeline by roughly 40% appears to be a political move rather than a result of technical problems, Germany’s vice chancellor said Wednesday.

The reduced flows follow Russia‘s halt of natural gas supplies to Bulgaria, Poland, Finland, Netherlands, Denmark as Europe works to reduce its dependence on Russian energy amid the war in Ukraine. Gas demand has fallen after the end of the winter heating season, but European utilities are racing to refill storage ahead of next winter with prices high and supplies uncertain.

Germany Needs More Windmills

And pronto!

But until then, just in case you were wondering:

Germany to continue buying Russian-provided oil, gas, coal – German Chancellor Olaf Scholz on Tuesday again dismissed calls to boycott Russian energy supplies in the wake of the attack on Ukraine.

Scholz said sanctions already imposed on Russia were hitting its economy “and this will only get more dramatic every day.”

At the same time, Scholz said the sanctions were designed to be “tolerable” for those imposing them, including in the long term.

“That is why Germany’s position on this question (of an energy boycott) remains unchanged,” he said.

Baby, It’s Coal Outside

But what could be more natural than coal, right? Is wind more natural? Why? How?

Germany: Coal tops wind as primary electricity source – In the first half of 2021, coal shot up as the biggest contributor to Germany’s electric grid, while wind power dropped to its lowest level since 2018. Officials say the weather is partly to blame.

The weather made us do it, the Greens will now explain. Like, duh. Are they finally starting to figure it out? The weather always makes us do it. The climate even (weather over time). It’s called not wanting to freeze to death.