Airbus (Some Call It Airbias) Needs More Germans

March 2, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: Airbus, Berlin, Business, EADS, France, German, Germans, Germany, Government, Humor, Paris, Satire Leave a comment

At least that’s what the Germans will tell you if you ask them, which of course nobody is.

OK, we’re actually talking about EADS here. “The German government is deeply concerned by the concentration and centralisation of research and development competencies in the headquarters in Toulouse, which have to a large degree led to the current imbalance,” a pissed off big-time German politician has lamented.

So much for Franco-German understanding (yet again). And if it were up to the Germans, they would even see to it that EADS ensure “equal numbers of French and German nationals occupy positions in the top five leadership levels,” although how you would equally distribute five people is unclear to me (government can do this kind of stuff, you know).

But none of this will lead to anything, folks. I can tell you that right now. The Airbus Chief Executive and designated EADS boss isn’t about to let any pigheaded German government official tell him what to do. His name is Thomas Enders and he’s a pigheaded German himself.

EADS was formed in 2000 from French, German and Spanish assets as a counterweight to U.S. aerospace and defense giants.

Speaking Of Ingratitude

March 1, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Abstention, Berlin, Business, Freedom, Gadhafi, German, Germans, Germany, Libya, Politics, Revolution, The Arab Spring, UN Leave a comment

Don’t the Libyans appreciate everything the Germans have done for them? Gee, I guess they don’t.

Before the Libyan revolution, Germany was the country’s second-largest trading partner. But then Germany abstained in a 2011 UN vote to militarily intervene in its civil war. Now that the war is over, German businesses and think tanks are finding that most Libyans want little to do with them.

“Water doesn’t flow uphill on its own / And wars, too, don’t stop themselves.”

Thanks But No Thanks

February 29, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Athens, Berlin, EU, Euro, German, Germans, Germany, Greece, Tax Collectors, Taxation, Taxes, The Euro Crisis, The Euro Zone, The Financial Crisis Leave a comment

Undank ist der Welten Lohn (nothing is so hard as man’s ingratitude).

What were you expecting, Germany? The Greeks have politely but firmly said no to a recent offer made by 160 German tax collectors who were ready, willing and able to fly down to Greece and help their Greek tax collector buddies gather Greek taxes in a more efficient and Teutonic-like manner.

The Greeks may be broke, but they’re not crazy. Not even Germans can stand German tax collectors

Als Begründung müssen die “hart arbeitenden griechischen Beamten” herhalten.

“Tax Advice Mission” Impossible

February 26, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Home Cooking Tags: Athens, Berlin, EU, Euro, Euro Zone, Financial Criis, German, Germans, Germany, Greece, Humor, Satire, Taxation, Taxes 1 Comment

How about a little more sensitivity here, Greece? Germans are only trying to help.

And it doesn’t look like they’re going to stop trying to help you anytime soon, either. That’s why if they can’t get that “budget commissioner” they proposed to help monitor the Greek government’s (lack of) management of its finances, some 160 German tax collectors have now selflessly volunteered for assignments in Greece to help gather Greek taxes more efficiently. And as you can imagine, when it comes to taxation and tax collection, German efficiency can really hurt.

A recent flurry of acrimonious exchanges between Athens and Berlin reflect deepening doubts among mainly northern members of the 17-nation euro zone about Greece’s ability and willingness to overhaul its economy to satisfy lenders’ demands.

Cut The Loses And Run

February 22, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Higher Education Tags: Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Renewable energy, Solar energy, Solar Power, Subsidies, Technology 1 Comment

The German government is about to cut solar subsidies by 30%.

Despite the massive investment, solar power accounts for only about 0.3% of Germany’s total energy. This is one of the key reasons why Germans now pay the second-highest price for electricity in the developed world (exceeded only by Denmark, which aims to be the “world wind-energy champion”).

According to Der Spiegel, even members of Chancellor Angela Merkel’s staff are now describing the policy as a massive money pit. Philipp Rösler, Germany’s Minister of Economics and Technology, has called the spiralling solar subsidies a “threat to the economy.”

“We don’t like your profligate spending,”

February 20, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Hi-tech, Hypocrisy Tags: Arms, Arms exports, Berlin, Financial crisis, German, Germans, Germany, Greece, Military, Weapons Leave a comment

Germans are always lecturing the Greeks. “Except when it comes to buying our ridiculously expensive weapons systems,” they maybe ought to add.

Over much of the past decade, Greece – which has a population of 11 million – has been one of the top five arms importers in the world.

Most of the vastly expensive weapons, including submarines, tanks and combat aircraft, were made in Germany, France and the United States.

The arms purchases were beyond Greece’s capacity to absorb, even before the financial crisis struck in 2009. Several hundred Leopard battle tanks were bought from Germany, but there was no money to pay for ammunition for their guns. Even in 2010, when the extent of the financial disaster was apparent, Greece bought 223 howitzers and a submarine from Germany at a cost of €403 million.

Unterdeckungen

February 16, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Hysteria Tags: Atomic energy, Atomic power, Berlin, Fukushima, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Nuclear power, Renewable energy, Satire, The Green Shirts, The Greens 4 Comments

That’s German for deficient coverage. And German readers might be reading that word a lot in the weeks to come, at least when it comes to the electricity supply in Germany.

„We have been observing for weeks now that something with the system just doesn’t seem to be right,” one market expert said.

And in a letter from Germany’s Federal Network Agency to the power traders it deals with, it makes clear its concern about the rather volitile situation going on at the moment and has even warned of the collapse of the German power network. It almost happened on Febuary 6, already, they wrote, as “substantial undercoverage continuing over several hours” nearly brought the system to its knees.

Hmmm. Last year at this time, during one of the coldest winters ever, there wasn’t any problem with the German electricity supply at all. What on earth could have possibly happened since then and now to have caused this disturbing situation?

Nach dem Reuters vorliegenden Schreiben stand das Stromnetz in den vergangenen Tagen mehrfach vor dem Kollaps.

Not With This Chancellor

February 14, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Home Cooking Tags: Berlin, Children, Demographics, Demography, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Politics, Satire, Taxation, Taxes 1 Comment

Five minutes of excitement is better than no excitement at all.

A group of young conservative politicians, concerned about Germany’s catastrophic demographic development (or the lack of it), received less than a warm welcome by their very own Chancellor Angela Merkel herself today: They’re pushing for a tax on the childless, you see.

Although most politicians are normally crazy about raising taxes or introducing new ones, Frau Merkel made it quite clear that the buck (the euro?) stops here. Like practically everybody else in Germany, she doesn’t have any kids, either.

„Ich glaube, die Diskussion der Einteilung in Menschen mit Kindern und ohne Kinder ist hier nicht zielführend.“

Berlinale Predictably Boring

February 11, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, High Art, Home Cooking, Hotness, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Berlin Film Festival#, Berlinale, Film, German, Germans, Germany, Hollywood, Humor, Movies, Satire 1 Comment

As usual. But at least we get to look at Angelina Jolie for awhile this year.

She and her husband what’s-his-name have been here for days now and refuse to go home, giving the notoriously anti-Hollywood Berlin Film Festival that all important Hollywood touch.

But as for the movies, the only Lichtblick (bright spot) I have heard about so far is a film called Barbara, “a harrowing reminder of what life was like two decades earlier behind the Iron Curtain and Berlin Wall that stood just a few meters to the east of theatres where the Berlinale is based.” You know, it’s a film about how suffocatingly horrible communist East Germany was. But who wants to see that? Here in Berlin of all places, I mean.

That and that flick about the Nazis on the dark side of the moon, of course.

“It’s not a film about East Germany, it’s a film about how people survive in a country that was on its way out.” – Hmm. Sounds like a film about Syria.

Electricity Scarce In Germany These Days For Some Reason

February 9, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helections, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Hysteria Tags: Atomic energy, Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Nuclear energy, Power Plants, Renewable energy, Satire, The Green Shirts 1 Comment

Germany’s power operators have requested that reserve generators at a power plant in southern Germany and two plants in Austria be activated because, well, the lights are fixin’ to go out here (it’s c-c-cold).

But don’t think for a moment that this has anything at all to do with eight of Germany’s 17 nuclear reactors having been switched off because of an earthquake in Japan last year because it doesn’t. You got that?

“We do not have a problem of supply, of quantity, it’s principally a question of stabilizing the network.”

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

Category Archives: Heconomy