If German men could only be more like American women…

Political men, I mean. And military women.

Sie hat 4000 Flugstunden absolviert, lenkte die Präsidentenmaschine “Air Force One” und servierte an Thanksgiving Truthahn auf dem Stützpunkt Ramstein: Margaret Woodward kommandiert die US-Kampfjets über Libyen – die erste Frau, die einen Luftkrieg koordiniert.

German Gaijin Just Don’t Get It

How could they?

Here are some lines from a report by a Spiegel journalist who, being a product of his Umwelt (environment), obviously can’t understand what is going on with these peculiar, “fatalistic” Japanese who have the audacity to show courage in the face of disaster.

There is little evidence of panic.

There is not a single person protesting on the streets in the entire city (Tokyo).

Japanese fireman Nakamura Junichiro: “It was not my choice, but I wanted to go there. This is the most difficult hour for Japan. It was my duty.”

“The tsunami represents a good opportunity to cleanse this greed (the egoism the elder speaker believes his fellow Japanese have succombed to), and one we must avail ourselves of.”

The destructive forces of nature, writes Asia expert Ian Buruma, are “to a certain extent part of Japanese culture.” This creates fertile ground for a Japanese fatalism that has developed throughout history and culminates in the expression “shikata ga nai,” meaning “it can’t be helped.” A further product is the widespread belief that nothing beautiful on Earth is permanent and that the Japanese people must close ranks in times of national disaster.

Those who seek to wait it out in Osaka must be gaijin — a non-Japanese or outsider. Someone who doesn’t understand that now, more than ever, every cog in the wheel counts. Someone who shirks his responsibility while a hero like fireman Nakamura Junichiro risks his life to cool down the reactors in Fukushima.

Germans Shut Down Simpsons Too

Just in case. For three months or so, I assume.

After the government shut down seven nuclear reactors for fear of, uh, fear itself, German broadcasters have now decided to ban episodes of The Simpsons that poke fun at nuclear disasters.

It seems that now that the Greens have exploited “the situation” (no, not that guy on Jersey Shore) and leapt to power in two state governments after elections held over the weekend, said broadcasters fear that hysterical Germans watching these episodes could die of hysterical laughter.

Chancellor Angela Merkel announced earlier this month a three-month moratorium on plans to extend the operating times of Germany’s nuclear plants and ordered that the seven oldest reactors be shut down.

More German Solidarity Soldifiying As We Speak

You’ve got to hand it to them. The Germans are consistent, at least.

Germany has withdrawn its four vessels from NATO operations in the Mediterranean because NATO has finally announced that it will support the no-fly zone over Libya by monitoring sea traffic in the region, this to include intercepting any vessels suspected of carrying illegal arms or mercenaries to that country.

Normally Feuer und Flamme (full of enthusiasm) for things like arms embargos (if German arms aren’t involved), the Germans don’t like this particular one because, well, they would actually be involved in it. And worse still, this mission permits the use of force if necessary, something the German navy could never ever bring itself to do, ever. Never. So they’ll pass again, thank you.

Mr Rasmussen at NATO: “All allies are committed to meet their responsibilities under the United Nations resolution to stop the intolerable violence against Libyan civilians.”

A Permanent Security Council Seat For Germany?

Let’s vote.

“Germany has lost its credibility in the United Nations and in the Middle East.”

“Germany has turned the idea of a unified European Union foreign policy into a farce.”

“Germany’s hopes for a permanent Security Council seat can be buried. Even the idea of an EU seat is damaged.”

“I don’t know what the German foreign minister was thinking, but (the abstention) doesn’t have much in common with a values-driven foreign policy nor with German and European Union interests.”

“German hopes for a permanent seat on the Security Council have been permanently dashed and one is now fearful of Europe’s future.”

“Why is it so difficult for us in Germany to realize that we have to help the rebels in Libya, primarily because a bloodbath is looming in Benghazi?”

“Everyone has seen pictures of the Warsaw ghetto. Everyone knows what happens when an army takes over a city. That’s why all parties in France, including on the left, were in favor of a military intervention in Libya. In Germany, that didn’t happen.”

“The opposition to our closest partner France is a break with all constants of German foreign policy since 1949.”

“I have nothing but shame for the failure of our government.”

“The reform of the United Nations Security Council remains a major goal for the German government. The German government’s willingness to shoulder more responsibility within the framework of such reform is unchanged.”

Do The Duck!

You know, the German Duck Responsibility Dance?

It goes like this: Over 60 percent of Germans asked think that the military intervention in Libya is a good thing. Over 65 percent of the same Germans asked think it’s even better that Germans are shirking their responsibility there.

It can be lonely living on the moral highground sometimes I guess, but who says you can’t have your Kuchen and eat it too?

Deutschland hatte sich bei der Abstimmung im UN-Sicherheitsrat enthalten und schließt einen Einsatz von Bundeswehrsoldaten aus.

Thanks once again, Germany!

We couldn’t have done it without you. But we did anyway.

“The Obama administration and America’s allies have won an open-ended endorsement from the United Nations for military action in Libya.”

“The administration deserves credit for getting this resolution passed with such strong support,” said a joint statement from Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., John McCain, R-Ariz., and Joe Lieberman, I-Conn.

Five nations abstained from the vote, one of them being America’s ally you-know-wer (who).

Bei der Abstimmung enthielten sich die Vetomächte Russland, China sowie Indien, Brasilien und auch Deutschland (way down on the bottom of the article).

Recent Tough Talk Less Tougher Now

As expected, Germany has rejected the idea of a no-fly zone over Libya on the grounds that someone (from Germany) might get hurt.

Using standard German anti-non-German-war reasoning, the creation of a no-fly zone would amount to a possible so-called military action which could actually involve so-called attacks against Libyan recent-old-buddy-now-despotic-leader Muammar Gaddafi’s anti-aircraft defenses.

This would be bad enough, for some reason, but worse still would be that these attacks, if unsuccessful, could open the way to an intervention on the ground which Germany would never, ever, ever be a part of anyway, as we all know, so why not just say no to the whole thing right now and get it over with?

French Foreign Minister Alain Juppe said on Wednesday that “only the threat of force can stop Gaddafi”. He said that several Arab states were ready to assist Western military intervention.

Germany Upset That US-Amerika Is Now Too Much Like Germany

Normally outraged at the very thought of American Alleingänge (solo runs), concerned Spiegel journalists and countless German Gutmenschen (starry-eyed idealist types) everywhere are clearly upset that President Obama is now backpedaling as fast as he can at the very thought of leading the way to establish a no-fly zone in Libya.

Gaddafi is not rolling over and dying as quickly as expected and this is turning into yet another embarassment for Germany and the rest of the EU because if this keeps up, sooner or later these countries may be forced to actually “do something” themselves and this, as we all know, is not something that they are prepared to do.

Hey, Germany. He’s your President. Too, I mean.

Obama schreckt vor Libyen-Alleingang zurück.

Surprise Terrorist Attack Shuts Down German Bundestag But Nobody Seems To Care All That Much Really

Islamic terrorists disquised as construction crew workers for the Vattenfall power company plunged Berlin’s Bundestag into near total darkness and cluelessness (even more cluelessness than usual) after launching a successful surpise attack upon a power cable three meters below the earth at 09:00 this morning somewhere the-hell-if-I-know-where in Berlin Mitte.

Computers are down, toilets are out, Germany is tumbling leaderless through space and nobody anywhere around here gives a shit.

As one Bundestag representative reported: “We are unable to work.” “Yeah,” his neighbor replied. “And now the damned power is out too.”

The Vattenfall terrorists, realizing that their mission to put Germany in a panic has utterly failed, now say that they will have the power back up again around four this afternoon. Or manjana maybe. Mal sehen (see what happens).

“Wir sind arbeitsunfähig.”