And You Thought Your Government Wastes Money

September 30, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: German, Germans, Germany, Government Waste, Spending, Studies, Waste 3 Comments

And it does. But the German state can burn the stuff up pretty good, too – at any level.

The German Federation of Tax Payers just came out with its latest “Black Book” of government waste, a breathtaking collection of 133 of the most impressive cases of abuse it found. Some are quite imaginative, I must say.

The city of Bergen on the island of Rügen, for instance, ordered 200,000 earthworms from a special firm in Holland for a sports field there – for over 7,000 euros. These special „Dutch Nightcrawlers“ were supposed to loosen up the hard playing field. They failed at that but made the field so “soiled” with worm Dreck (filth) that it couldn’t be used anymore.

Or how about the five manhole covers in Osnabrück with the colorful LED lamps on the side? They only cost 10,000 euros a shot. They sure are purty, though.

Then there’s the State Ministry for Culture boss who felt the need to have a “cemetery app” developed that would show its users where over 1,000 famous graves are located. It was called “Where They Rest” and all it did was redirect these users to the website with the same name. It only set tax payers back some 548,000 euros, however.

Nicht kleckern sondern klotzen, I say. Don’t take anything halfway.

German Media Giving Germans A Distorted Image Of The Migrant Crisis?

September 24, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Distortion, German, Germans, Germany, Journalism, Media, Migrants, Misrepresentation, Political correctness, Refugees, UK Leave a comment

No way. Or way?

The German language website Frankfurter Allgemene has reported on how the British media “reports on the crisis differently than the German” media.

The newspaper explains: “When it came to clashes between Hungarian border guards and refugees, the BBC showed young men who threw stones.”

The rioting, fit young men were of course described as “hungry”, “desperate” and “defensive,” but at least the images were shown. The suggestion that such a key part of the developing story was omitted on German TV is a startling one.

“On [German channel] ARD Tagesschau,” Frankfurter Allgemenie reports, “the most dramatic pictures could not be seen – instead, women and children, fleeing the tear gas by security forces [was shown]… German television suggesting disproportionate action by Hungary, however the BBC reported of the “defense of the borders…””

Flüchtlinge sind eine Chance, heißt immerfort. Und das entspricht der Wahrheit. Gleichzeitig jedoch stellen uns die 800 000 Flüchtlinge vor Integrationsprobleme, die offen anzusprechen ein Tabu ist. Menschen, die dies trotzdem tun, werden unbedarft rechts verortet, teils sogar medial beleidigt. Dabei muss das Stellen von Fragen erlaubt sein: Wenn so getan wird, als gäbe es bei hunderttausenden Flüchtlingen keine oder kaum Probleme, können diese auch nicht bekämpft werden.

Germans Outraged Over Russian Air Force Support For Assad

September 23, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Assad, Büchel, Demonstrations, German, Germans, Germany, Nuclear Bombs, Putin 2 Comments

And they’re demonstrating accordingly. No, wait. I got something mixed up here. Now I remember: They’re outraged about American plans to upgrade its nuclear presence in Germany and are demonstrating accordingly about that (the United States intends to place 20 B61-12 nuclear bombs at the Büchel Air Base later this year).

And set your watches on this one because it won’t be long before they will also be loudly supporting Putin’s “counter measures to restore the balance of power in Europe.” It’s like tradition or something.

Die Bundesregierung fordert seit langem einen Abzug der Amerikaner.

Wertheim

September 21, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Hate, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Arson, Germany, Refugees, Wertheim, Xenophobia Leave a comment

Beautiful German arson attack of the week.

Because somebody has to notice they’re happening.

„Von der Spurenlage her sieht es nach Brandbeschleuniger aus.“

German Of The Day: Dreck Am Stecken

September 20, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Hard Facts, Health, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy Tags: Automobiles, Crime, Defeat Devices, Emissions Testing, Environment, EPA, German, Germans, Germany, Greens, Industry, Language, Volkswagen 3 Comments

That means there is dirt stuck (to you) somewhere or you have dirt under your carpet – as in having done something wrong or illegal.

You know, like Volkswagen has/does in US-Amerika? The company inserted a device into almost 500,000 cars meant to trick emissions testing, the EPA says. Volkswagen is not denying this.

So the next time Germans begin those tiring lectures about doing more for the Umwelt (another German word meaning environment), remember to make sure and check if their emissions are make-believe or not.

There are almost 500,000 vehicles on American roads with the devices installed, according to the EPA. Volkswagen must now pay to repair the emissions systems in affected cars. The government may also fine the company as much as $18 billion.

Migrants To Crash The Oktoberfest ITSELF?

September 18, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Helplessness, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Beer, Dirndl, German, Germans, Germany, Islam, Lederhosen, Migrants, Munich, Oktoberfest, Refugees, Syria 3 Comments

Of all fests? Is nothing heilig anymore? Some folks are already referring to number 182 as the Krisen-Wiesn (crisis Oktoberfest). In your neighborhood tomorrow. If you live in Munich, I mean.

On Munich’s main shopping street on Tuesday, women in abayas—the long robes worn by some Muslim women—were studying lederhosen and dirndls—the revealing shorts and dresses traditional in Bavaria—in the shop windows.

“Asylum seekers in particular from Muslim countries aren’t used to encountering heavily drunk people in public. It could get out of hand.”

What To Do When You Get Your Next German Panic Attack

September 17, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Health, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Humor, Hustle (Hoax), Hypochondria, Hysteria Tags: Angst, Anxiety, Disease Mongering, Dyspnea, German, Germans, Germany, High Anxiety, Hypochondria, Panic Attacks, Tachycardia, Tinnitracks, Tinnitus 1 Comment

First of all: Don’t panic.

Then stick your fingers in your ears because you’re probably about to develop an acute case of tinnitus. Because of all off that repressed panic or something.

But don’t panic about that, either. I SAID BUT DON’T PANIC ABOUT THAT, EITHER!

Panikattacken: Einfache Ratschläge gegen Atemnot, Schwitzen und Herzrasen

But I Didn’t Inhale

September 13, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Health, Helections, Hideology, High Art, Humor Tags: Anton Hofreiter, Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Greens, Legalization, Legislation, Marijuana, Pot 1 Comment

Now this one here knocked my socks CLEAN off. Finally, some real news.

German GREEN whip Anton Hofreiter from the GREEN party has revealed in a shocking interview about his new GREEN Book entitled “Toking and Criminality” that yes, he, too, he HIM-GREEN-SELF actually smoked GREEN pot in his youth. He didn’t do it all that often, though. And it goes without saying that he didn’t inhale. And that was way back when in his youth, like he says. When he was young and stuff.

His drugs today are wine and beer. Damn. He reminds me of me.

“Ja, ich habe in meiner Jugend gekifft.”

The Donald’s 15 Minutes Threatening US-Amerika’s Once Proud Democracy

September 11, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: American Dream, Anti-Americanism, Der Spiegel, Donald Trump, Doom, Elections, German, Germans, Germany, Gloom, Journalism, The Rich 10 Comments

Here’s this here way sophisticated high-brow Spiegel article in a nutshell like.

The American Dream is broken (again).

The super-rich are the only people who have profited from the considerable economic growth in the US in recent decades (the plain old filthy rich were left out in the cold this time, I guess).

The shifts in income that have taken place in recent years are destroying the moral fabric of society (maybe, but it’s a fabric still made in the USA, pal, so deal with it).

Not a single one of the current candidates for president is willing to call for an increase in taxes (this is a very, very Bad Thing for some reason).

The super-wealthy are against anything that might help the bottom 90 percent to rise (that is one heavy bottom, isn’t it?).

America is just an oligarchy with unlimited political bribery being the essence of getting the nominations for president or to elect the president (quoted form someone who should know: Jimmy Carter).

But is it really any more democratic that a billionaire can buy his own election instead of allowing himself to be bought by others?

Rottenburg AND Ebeleben

September 7, 2015 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Hate, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Arson, Ebeleben, Germany, Racism, Refugees, Rottenburg, Xenophobia Leave a comment

Beautiful German arson attacks of the week.