What Do You Need A House For?

Especially since I’ve already got mine. Several, most likely. No need to research that claim we all know it’s true.

Green

A ban on building new single-family houses in popular urban areas has been mooted by a leading German Green MP, who has said they are environmentally unfriendly because they use too much space and energy.

“Single-family homes consume a large surface area, a lot of construction material and energy and they lead to urban sprawl and therefore generate more traffic,” he told Der Spiegel magazine in an interview.

“The Greens have once again surpassed themselves with this populist and sanctimonious attitude.”

First Come The Wooden Skyscrapers

Wood

Then come the wooden cars.

Car

German Greenery marches on.

A skyscraper that would be Europe’s tallest wooden building promises a “social and ecological paradigm shift” in a gentrifying neighborhood — and a test for the city’s affordable housing model.

The 322 foot (98 meter) tower, whose construction was confirmed on Jan. 29 by sustainable developer UTB, the state of Berlin and the borough of Friedrichshain-Kreuzberg the will be made largely of wood…

Such a forward-looking approach aligns with the term that often accompanies green building projects in Germany — zukunftsfähig, which means both sustainable and “future-oriented.”

 

Give Me Your 30,000 Jobs Or I Crush You!

Tesla’s German gigafactory held up by sand lizard – Court halts work cutting down trees because of conservation fears for the protected species.

Gorn

This is how Germany works, folks. Or doesn’t work. Take your pick it’s both.

Some commentators have warned that the court decision to stop the forest clearance was a bad omen. Marcel Fratzscher, head of the DIW, a think-tank, said it highlighted the “heavy bureaucratic burden and high regulatory uncertainty, which make it costly and time-consuming for companies to realise investment projects” in Germany.

“German law is too often held hostage by vested interests so that Germany is at risk of becoming less attractive as a location for businesses,” he said.

“Like most Humans,” said Captain Kirk. “I seem to have an instinctive revulsion to reptiles. I must fight to remember that this is an intelligent, highly advanced individual, the captain of a starship like myself.”

 

German Of The Day: Rodungsstopp

That means to stop the clearing. Of trees, in this case.

Tesla

That this particular Rodungsstopp could also stop the construction of Tesla’s planned Gigafactory in Brandenburg – and what could turn out to  be the livelihood of 12,000 people – doesn’t seem to interest the greener than green politicians who have sought it.

Tesla has been ordered to temporarily halt preparations for a car factory in Germany after environmentalists won a court injunction on Sunday…

Protesters say the factory is a threat to local wildlife and water supplies…

According to local media reports, Tesla has promised to relocate colonies of forest ants, reptiles and bats, and is working with conservationists. Last month, authorities defused seven Second World War bombs discovered at the site.

Tesla currently has two Gigafactories in the US and one in Shanghai, China.

Der Rodungsstopp an der geplanten Tesla-Fabrik in Brandenburg alarmiert die Wirtschaft: Mehrere Verbände warnen vor Konsequenzen für den gesamten Standort Deutschland.

A Show Of Forest

Greta joins forces with the Robin Hoodlum activists of Hambach Forest in Germany. You know, in Media Hyperspace? Nothing can stop them now or something.

Greta

Climate activist Greta Thunberg makes surprise visit to German forest – While on her way to a UN climate conference, 16-year-old climate activist Greta Thunberg stopped in western Germany to stand with activists at the Hambach Forest. The woods have been threatened by a nearby lignite mine.

Greta & Co really need to get out (of the forest) more and gather a little real world experience. For health reasons alone. As William James (The varieties of Religious Experience) once put it: Spiritual excitement takes pathological forms whenever other interests are too few and the intellect too narrow.

“This is so important because it is so symbolic.”

The Future Looks C-C-Cold

In Germany. In the winter.

Cold

Thousands of people marched Saturday in Berlin to demand that Germany speed up its exit from coal-fired power plants, a day before the opening of a U.N. climate summit in neighboring Poland.

“Stop Coal!” is the rallying call today. “Stop nuclear power!” was yesterday. The Germans have already shut down their nuclear power industry due to an earthquake in Japan. Don’t ask.

Some of these demonstrators have clearly thought all of this through, however. That’s why they’re wearing those polar bear suits. “Somebody turn on the freakin’ heat already!” Will by the rallying cry of the future.

“The future is coal-free.”

Save The Wolves!

Save the wolves? So they can attack us at… cemeteries?

Wolf

These romantic visions of nature everybody fosters these days are all fine and good, I guess, but sometimes they can get a little creepy.

The German news agency dpa reported Wednesday that a 55-year-old man was working on the cemetery in the village of Steinfeld in Lower Saxony on Monday when he felt something biting his hand from behind. When he turned around, he saw a wolf attacking him and three other wolves watching from a distance. He managed to free himself from the wolf’s bite and shooed all the animals away. Then he went to see a doctor, who bandaged his injured hand.

Man oh man. This time there will definitely be consequences.

Auf einem Friedhof in Niedersachsen hat offenbar ein Wolf am Dienstag einen Menschen angegriffen. Nach Polizeiangaben soll das Tier den 55-jährigen Gemeindemitarbeiter in den linken Unterarm gebissen haben.

This Is Tree-Hugger Treason!

Or treeson, I should say. What? They’re already ready to give up after a mere six years and just… leaf?

Tree

German police confront treehouse activists after six-year standoff – Hundreds of police officers have descended on a patch of forest in western Germany occupied by activists living in treehouses, in an escalation of a long-running environmental battle.

Dozens of protesters have occupied 60 treehouses, some as high as 25 metres off the ground, since 2012 in an attempt to protect the ancient Hambach forest from being felled to make way for the expansion of an open-pit coalmine.

Why, I’m shocked. Wood you believe it? And they were doing such a treemendous job up there, too. What do they do now? Look for a new branch of work?

Polizei holt ersten Hambach-Aktivisten von Plattform.

Coffee From Togo To Be Heavily Taxed

At last count, Germans who purchase coffee from Togo toss some 3 billion of the disposable cups used to temporarily carry it in each and every year.

Togo

Predictably outraged by this, German green shirts have predictably outraged German coffee vendors by suggesting that a 20-cent tax be placed on this luxury drink to encourage coffee Togo connoisseurs to bring along their reusable and occasionally re-washable coffee Togo coffee cups with them, preferably hanging on the environmentally friendly coffee Togo belt loop hangers attached to their biodegradable pants.

Should this prove to be too impractical for some customers, the ecological crusaders suggest, vendors should offer them a discount option (taxpayer subsidized) of drinking the invigorating beverage directly from their trembling cupped hands.

“Nehmen Sie sich ein wenig Zeit und trinken Ihren Kaffee vor Ort – aus einer Tasse.”

German Tree Hugger Forcibly Removed After 130 Hours

From her tree. In a place called the Hambacher Forst. After occupying it in the name of tree love (a bad energy company wants to cut down the tree for bad energy purposes).

Tree hugger

The traumatized tree refused to comment and is being treated for hug burns.

Mittels einer Hebebühne holten die Höhenkletterer der Polizei die Aktivistin gegen 11.30 Uhr von der Plattform, nahmen sie in Gewahrsam.