German Nuclear Power Plant Explodes

Just kidding. Hardy, har, har. Everybody knows Germans don’t have nuclear power plants anymore. Well, not many. One less now for sure.

Former German nuke plant towers demolished in morning blasts – The two cooling towers of a former nuclear power plant in southwestern Germany have been demolished in a pair of early-morning explosions whose timing was kept under wraps to prevent crowds from gathering during the coronavirus pandemic

This Guy Has The Darwin Award In The Bag

Man dies in Germany after blowing up condom machine: A man died on Christmas Day in Germany after he was hit in the head by a flying piece of metal from a condom machine that he and two accomplices blew up in an apparent robbery attempt, police said on Monday.

Darwin

They didn’t give the names of the two accomplices but I’ll bet you a pack of Trojans they were Moe and Larry.

The Darwin Awards recognize individuals who have supposedly contributed to human evolution by selecting themselves out of the gene pool via death or sterilization by their own actions.

Mit einem selbst gebauten Sprengsatz wollte das Trio wohl an die Einnahmen aus dem Gummi-Automaten kommen.

And You Thought US-Amerika Had Problems With Potholes

A Second World War bomb discovered under one of Germany’s busiest autobahns has blown a 65ft hole in the road after it exploded.

Pothole

Bomb disposal experts were forced to carry out a controlled explosion after being unable to defuse the 1,000lb British shell which was unearthed during construction work.

Der britische Blindgänger war neben der stark befahrenen Autobahn 3 in der Nähe des Frankfurter Flughafens bei Bauarbeiten gefunden worden. Um die Fundstelle wurde eine 1000-Meter-Sicherheitszone eingerichtet. Die Autobahn wurde voll gesperrt, es kam zu kilometerlangen Staus.

Good Point

“While there are genuine pacifists in Germany,” as German President Joachim Gauck recently noted at the Munich Security Conference, “there are also people who use Germany’s guilt for its past as a shield for laziness or a desire to disengage from the world.”

Gauck

Very true. But believe you me, if he or anybody else out there seriously thinks for one cotton-pickin’ minute that Germans are suddenly going to seriously consider “a more muscular foreign policy” (use their army for what armies are actually intended to be used for) just because of any good points he or anybody else out there might make, he and that anybody else out there should be tested for doping. Ain’t NEVER gonna happen here.

Es darf nichts kosten (it can’t cost anything).

“Germany is really too big to just comment from the sidelines.” Duh. So? How does that saying go again? Germany is too big for Europe and too small for the world.

PS: Germans are still really good at blowing up stuff, though.

Boom