More German Oddity 15

Berlin: WWII Bomb Find Leads to Evacuation of Thousands, Including the Mayor – In Berlin’s ‘Mitte’ district, a large WWII bomb was found on a construction site on Tuesday. Police started evacuating thousands of people in the evening. They included Berliners and visitors.

Berlin

Berlin’s Governing Mayor Michael Müller, the Senate and their staff were evacuated from Red City Hall on Tuesday, due to a World War II bomb find. The latter weighs 250 kilos (550 pounds). A bomb disposal unit was supposed to diffuse the bomb this evening, but the evacuation took time.

German Oddity 15. Germany is a place where huge underground bombs are routinely unearthed all around the country and this barely even makes second page news. In fact, most Germans directly affected are more annoyed about it than anything else. They grudgingly leave their homes until the bomb crews have disarmed or detonated the damned things. Over 5,000 bombs are found in Germany every year.

What Do You Want, A Cookie?

25-year-old German cookie heiress apologizes for downplaying her family’s history of using Nazi forced labor on the grounds that ‘we treated them well.’

Cookie

Verena Bahlsen, whose great-grandfather Hermann Bahlsen founded the eponymous company that produces the Leibniz brand of cookie, told Germany’s Bild newspaper last week that the company did nothing wrong when it employed dozens of forced laborers during World War II.

“This was before my time and we paid the forced laborers exactly as much as German workers and we treated them well,” Bahlsen said, as cited by Reuters. The German newspaper published the remarks on Tuesday.

Keksunternehmerin Verena Bahlsen bittet um Entschuldigung – und will dazulernen.

German Of The Day: Weltkriegsbombe

That means a bomb from a world war (there have been more than one, you see). You know, like the one they just found in London forcing the closure of its City Airport today?

Bombe

Please note here: It is a bomb from a  world war. It is not an American or a British bomb. Nor is it a French or a Soviet bomb. It goes without saying that it certainly could not be a German bomb because it is a bomb from a world war, OK? Why somebody would bury it there like that is hard to say and no one knows who did it, either. So move along, please. Nothing to see here. Weltkriegsbombe, got it?

Bauarbeiter haben im Osten Londons eine Bombe aus dem Zweiten Weltkrieg entdeckt.

Germans Think Renewed Storming Of Reichstag A Bad Idea

Disturbed about Moscow’s plans to have hordes of young Russians storm the German Reichstag, concerned politicians in Berlin wish to stress that this could led to a dangerous militarization of Russia’s youth.

Friends

“Friends just do not storm friends,” one top official said, also noting that a new attack upon the German capital would only contribute to a further deterioration of Russia’s relationship with Germany, a relationship that is growing increasingly estranged at the moment. Russian politicians could not be reached for comment as the Russian capital has been moved to a secret location due to fears of an imminent German youth attack.

“Oh, this Reichstag is in Russia somewhere?” another top official asked later, finally figuring out that this is all just a big game. “That’s pretty deplorable, too.”

The replica of Berlin’s historical Reichstag, which has housed the seat of Germany’s parliament since 1999, will be built in “Patriot Park” and be used by the Russian youth movement, called “Junarmija”  or “young army.”

German Of The Day: Frontstadt

That means a city on the front or on the front-line. You know, like the Berlin of today?

Berlin

Or at least that’s what certain people here in town seem to think about it. Some are even calling it a failed state.

Take a deep breath here now. They don’t really mean that, of course, but in terms of an upcoming city election the situation here is pretty dramatic for a large number of Berliners who might want to vote. Due to the continued chaos at the various Bürgerämter (citizen’s offices) throughout the various districts of the city (unbelievable waiting times for appointments being the main problem here) it is estimated that some 280,000 new and newly-moved Berliners will not be able to register to vote in time. They are now being encouraged to contest the results of any election they were not able to take part in.

One election researcher says that the last time Germany experienced this kind of chaos was shortly after World War II.

Ein Wahlforscher sagt, dass es ein derartiges Chaos in Deutschland zuletzt kurz nach dem Zweiten Weltkrieg gegeben habe. Berlin ist wieder Frontstadt, erfreulicherweise ohne Bombardements.

Nazi Nuclear Bombs Found Underground Near Underground Nazi UFO Site

Near these, a Nazi gold train was also discovered. And the Amber Room. And the Loch Ness Monster.

Nazi

It too had been buried deep underground right next to the underground Nazi Time Tunnel device that helped Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan win World War II and occupy the dystopian alternative history-like America we all live in today, albeit in an underground fashion.

“Eventually, it will decompose, and we will have a second Chernobyl on our hands.”

Dumb Question

“What Would Have Happened if Germany Had Invaded the U.S. During World War II?”

Germans

That’s easy. They would have ended up like this little Canadian robot dude who, like, just tried invading our country or something.

Philadelphia is the city of brotherly love, OK? Nobody ever said anything about robots.

Let’s be honest, whether fair or not, Philadelphia has a certain reputation. It’s a city where football fans booed and threw snowballs at Santa Claus. Baseball fans once threw D cell batteries (the big ones) at visiting outfielder J.D. Drew. And now, it’s where an adorable robot who was only counting on the kindness of strangers to hitchhike across the country was vandalized, effectively ending his summer trip.

Barbarian Hordes From The Steppes Threatening Berlin Again

Only this time they’re coming on motorcycles. And they don’t even belong to the Hells Angels. Like, how indecorous is that?

Bikers

Politicians and activists in the European Union’s ex-communist east are outraged over a plan by the Night Wolves to commemorate the Soviet victory in World War II by tracing the Red Army’s path to Berlin.

At least 20 riders will cruise from Moscow through Belarus, according to the Night Wolves’ website. From Poland, they’ll pass through the capitals of Slovakia to Austria before continuing to Prague and ending in Berlin on May 9, the 70th anniversary of Nazi Germany’s capitulation to the Soviet Union.

Hey Johnny, what are you rebelling against?

Bad German Historian Woman Points Out Trümmerfrau Myth

… Every time another memorial goes up in the “rubble woman’s” honor, German politicians look to what former German Chancellor Helmut Kohl said in Munich in 2005. The rubble-clearing women in the aftermath of WWII are “a symbol of the German people’s wish to rebuild and of their powers of survival,” he said, adding that the Munich monument “commemorates the large number of women who volunteered to clear the ruins.”

Wrong, says historian Leonie Treber. Neither was there a great number of women, nor did most of them volunteer to clear the rubble, the researcher says. “The Trümmerfrau is a German legend.”

Rubble Women

Yet it wasn’t just the women who were reserved when it came to clearing the war debris; men weren’t crazy about the task, either. In the eyes of the Germans, it was anything but honorable for people to show their “willingness to rebuild.” In fact, most Germans regarded clearing rubble as punishment – and for a reason.

During the war, the Nazis made soldiers, the Hitler Youth, forced laborers, prisoners of war and concentration camp prisoners clear the bombed cities after Allied air raids. In 1945, after the end of the war, prisoners of war and former members of the NSDAP Nazi party took their place. When that turned out to be insufficient, the population was asked to help – on a voluntary basis in the West, but usually against their will in the Soviet occupation zone.