Author Archives: Hermann Observer

Joe Biden Can Say Squirrel

June 12, 2014 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

And that’s not that easy, you know. He can say “xenophobic,” too. For no particular reason at all.

Joe

Joe Biden says all kinds of stuff, all the time. He can say Obama’s healthcare enactment “is a “big f**king deal,” for instance. He can even say to a wheelchair-bound politician to “stand up for a round of applause.” The problem here, of course, is getting Joe Biden to stop staying stuff.

“Look at Germany. Look at the rest of the world. America is the only non-xenophobic nation in the world that’s a major economy.”

This Is Supposed To Be News?

June 11, 2014 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , 6 Comments

It’s never been any different.

Trust

A poll published by research firm infratest dimap last week indicates German trust in the U.S. has plummeted to lows not seen since the thick of the Iraq war. Another poll, published in May, showed those Germans surveyed were more interested in deepening their country’s ties with China than they were in doing so with the U.S. A third, published in April, showed that nearly half wanted Germany to take a “middle position” in the Ukraine conflict rather than standing firmly on the side of the West.

Maybe The Turks Could Build One Of These New-Fangled Airport Thingies In Berlin, Too

June 8, 2014 By in Heconomy, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

The construction of the world’s largest airport began on June 7 in Istanbul with a massive groundbreaking ceremony. When fully completed in 2018, the 10 billion-euro airport will be able to carry 150 million passengers a year, making it one of the world’s busiest airports.

Airport

Meanwhile, back in Germany…

Berlin’s disastrous airport project (groundbreaking so long ago nobody can remember anymore, at one time planned to open in June 2012 Anno Domini) was hit with another scandal after its technical director was suspended pending an investigation into alleged corruption. A “leading employee” responsible for awarding contracts during the on-going construction of the hopelessly-delayed Berlin Brandenburg airport (BER), is suspected of having demanded €500,000 bribes from a prospective contractor.

Berlin’s airport is already too small.

N S A B N D M O U S E

June 6, 2014 By in Habitudes, Hi-tech, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Who’s the leader of the club
That spies on you and me?
N S A B N D M O U S E!

BND

Germany’s foreign intelligence agency is officially lifting the lid on some of its worst-kept secrets by acknowledging that half a dozen facilities are in fact spy stations.

“Diese Aufgaben gehören zum Kernauftrag des Bundesnachrichtendienstes und beruhen auf gesetzlicher Grundlage. Zu diesen Aufgaben stehen wir, weshalb wir zukünftig auf die Legendierung dieser Außenstellen im Inland verzichten.”

Not Even German Astronauts Can Escape Tatort

June 5, 2014 By in Habitudes, Hi-tech, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

A Soyuz spacecraft launched last night (May 28) from Baikonur cosmodrome in Kazakhstan docked with the International Space Station in the early hours of this morning. Onboard were ESA astronaut Alexander Gerst and his Expedition 40/41 crewmates, who will now live and work in space for the next six months…

Spiegel

And watch Tatort.

Der deutsche Astronaut Alexander Gerst (38) erlebt derzeit das, wozu viele Menschen wahrscheinlich nie die Möglichkeit haben werden: Als Bordingenieur arbeitet er nun für einige Monate auf der internationalen Raumstation ISS. Damit verbunden ist natürlich ein atemberaubender Bilck auf die Erde. Doch auf eines möchte der Raumfahrer während seiner Mission im All nicht verzichten: die “Tagesthemen” und den Tatort.

Bio Business Big Bad Business

June 4, 2014 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Everybody buys Bio (organic) here. You know, like with real, non-organic money? It’s not just for the bio bourgeoisie anymore.

Bio

So don’t watch that there “Bio-Illusion” documentary on Arte if you can help it, folks. Not even if you can go back in time to yesterday to see it when it was on, I mean. Which you can’t, I bet.

Those who believe that organic farming is the work of some sinister food mafia will only be reinforced after watching the documentary “Bio-Illusion.” The others will be angry, with good reason.

Wo Bio draufsteht, muss noch längst nicht Bio drin sein.

PS: Speaking of the organic illusion, here’s another one for you here made in the US of A.

That’s No German Sunbather

June 3, 2014 By in Helplessness, High Art, Higher Education Tags: , , , , , , 1 Comment

This here “Video captures terrifying moment low-flying plane misses German sunbather by just inches” video is like such a fake.

That dude can’t be a German sunbather. He’s still wearing clothes.

A German sunbather is seen just seconds before a plane nearly collided into him while attempting to land on a nearby airstrip at the island of Helgoland, in northern Germany.