Tag Archives: Language

German Of The Day: Die Befriedigung Voyeuristischer Bedürfnisse

February 13, 2015 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hi-tech, High Art, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

That means the satisfaction of voyeuristic needs. And that is not, this guy here below repeats, NOT what his possible participation in the upcoming reality-show-media-spectacle “Mars One” on RTL is going to be about.

Mars One

Well not for him, perhaps. He says he just wants to make the world a better place. On Mars (he’s young – and has an SPD party membership book). And of the 200,000 people who have applied to take part in this cosmic kamikaze picnic he has made it all the way up to the last 660 future contestants batch. You know, he’s still being casted like they do on Germany’s Next Topmodel by Heidi Klum? His mom must be really proud.

You see, the planned “Mars One” mission will need lots and lots of dough to properly sponsor, I mean send their crews to their deaths and that’s why the TV rights have already been sold to the Dutch production firm Endemol, the same folks who bring us, I mean you, shows like Big Brother. So I guess we know where this is going – other than to Mars, I mean – but it has nothing whatsoever to do with the satisfaction of voyeuristic needs, to come full circle again already. No, it clearly doesn’t. It’s just about a simple suicide mission to Mars. Nothing more, nothing less.

Hey, I’m all for the exploration of Mars. But a one-way ticket there for human beings in reality show format is, well, as one guy in the article rightly points out, “ethically questionable” to say the least.

Es geht nicht um die Befriedigung voyeuristischer Bedürfnisse.

German Of The Day: Scherzkeks

February 6, 2015 By in Habeas Corpus, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

A “joke cookie” here is what we call a wisecracker. You know, a jokester? Take this jokester here at Tegel Airport today (this guy really kills me).

Tegel

He’s getting ready to board his flight with his girlfriend for their vacation in Florida, right? So they’re having a look at his carry-on bag and he says – now get this – “There’s a bomb inside.” Funny. As. Scheiße! Don’t you think? And original, too. But the real punch line part only comes around a little later: He wasn’t allowed to take that flight, screws up his vacation, impresses his girlfriend big-time forever and then gets charged with another cool German word: Ordnungswidrigkeit (an administrative offense or infraction)! Hardy, har, har. Brilliant joke cookie stuff who needs the crackers?

Some people are just more funny than other people are, I’ve found. Evolution wants it that way or something.

Like this guy’s uncle here earlier in the week (I’m assuming of course it just has to be this guy’s uncle). He walked in through security control at Tegel with a revolver and 43 rounds of ammunition in his carry-on bag because – now get this – he didn’t know it was in there! Ha, ha. Apparently the bag had been given to him when his father died and he had never bothered to look inside before and just grabbed the thing at random when he needed a bag for his flight. Hilarious stuff.

But how on earth do they manage to think any of this up?

“Dieser sensible Sicherheitsbereich ist einfach kein Ort für schlechte Scherze.”

German Of The Day: Lieber ein Ende mit Schrecken als ein Schrecken ohne Ende

January 30, 2015 By in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Heconomy, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

That means “better a terrifying end than unending terror.” In other words, it’s time for Greece to get those drachma machines running again.

Greece

But the Greeks already know this themselves. That’s what they just voted for. Sure, we’ll get to watch how Greece and the EU (Germany) play around with each other for a few weeks as if both sides are tying to find a new solution for a solution that has already long been in place but in the end Greece will leave the EU. This new Greek government is the undertaker man (don’t shake that guy’s hand!). They will point their fingers at Germany on the way out telling Greek voters “we tried everything we could, but…” and then, well, it’s back to the real world again. And this will be a good thing for Greece – in the long run.

Hey, this reminds me of another German saying: Geh mit Gott, aber geh! Go with God, but go!

Entgegen allen Warnungen aus Deutschland und Europa lehnt die griechische Regierung Gespräche mit den internationalen Geldgebern ab. Sie seien in Athen nicht willkommen.

15 Cool German Illnesses You Can Only Get Here

January 29, 2015 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hustle (Hoax), Hypochondria Tags: , , , , , , , 5 Comments

Mostly because 1) you probably can’t pronounce them and 2) they don’t really exist.

Zivilizationskrankheit

Germans aren’t hypochondriacs, by the way. They’re Hypochonder.

14. ZIVILISATIONSKRANKHEIT

Zivilisationskrankheit, or “civilization sickness” is a problem caused by living in the modern world. Stress, obesity, eating disorders, carpal tunnel syndrome and diseases like type 2 diabetes are all examples.

German Of The Day: 5 Billionen

January 19, 2015 By in Hard Facts, Heconomy, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

That means 5 trillion (don’t ask, but it really does). And that’s how many euros German savers have set aside for a rainy day.

Trillion

That’s going to be one rainy day.

Zwar investierten die privaten Haushalte ihr Geld trotz niedriger Zinsen vor allem in kurzfristige und vermeintlich sichere Bankeinlagen. Trotzdem wuchs ihr Geldvermögen von Juli bis September 2014 um 28 Milliarden Euro oder 0,6 Prozent auf 5,01 Billionen Euro, wie die Deutsche Bundesbank mitteilte.

German Of The Day: Die Initiative Ergreifen

January 16, 2015 By in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Hideology, Higher Education, Home Cooking Tags: , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

That means taking the initiative. You know, as in arresting two Salafists in Berlin Wedding on suspicion of recruiting fighters for Isis in Syria?

Salafists

And it’s about freaking time, people. And congratulations to Belgium on their fine catch, too.

Following the recent attacks in Paris and the thwarting on Thursday of a terrorist plot in Belgium, 250 officers simultaneously raided 11 addresses across the German capital.

And Speaking Of Free Speech…

January 13, 2015 By in Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , Leave a comment

The latest German Un-Word of the Year is Lügenpresse or “the lying press.” The year is still pretty young though, if you ask me. But still.

Lügenpresse

Of ill repute as it is a term that was gladly used way back when during World War I and then later by the Nazis themselves, it’s been in the news a lot these days because that EVIL Pegida is using the term, as well. If you accuse the press of lying you’re a Nazi here, I guess. So watch it.

I mean, it’s not like the media here in Germany would ever manipulate or mislead us or spin or hype or ignore things or anything like that there, right?

Der Ausdruck “Lügenpresse” ist als Parole der Pegida-Bewegung erst seit wenigen Wochen in aller Munde. Die Bezeichnung blickt allerdings auf eine lange wie auch traurige Geschichte zurück – als Devise von Demokratiegegnern jeglicher Couleur.

Germans Not Overdoing It Again

January 12, 2015 By in Habitudes, Helplessness, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Honest. With their anti-Islamization bzw. (and) anti-Pegida hysteria, I mean.

Legida

Not with Bagida.
Not with Bärgida.
Not with Hagida.
Not with Legida.
Not with Muegida.
Not with Mvgida.
Not with Öz-Gida.
Not with Schwegida.
Not even with Merkel-Ida herself, for crying out loud.

Maybe it’s time to like gida life already, people.

German Of The Day: Denkverbot

January 6, 2015 By in Habitudes, Helections, Helplessness, Hideology, History, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

That means a ban on thinking. And that’s what this latest anti-Pegida or anti-anti-Islamization hysteria is all about.

PEGIDA

This is so German it hurts. This anti-anti-Islamization movement isn’t primarily a protest against the Pegida anti-Islamization movement in my view (although of course it is that, too), it is going through that classic German ritual of protesting against the German Nazi past by trying to compensate for the anti-Nazi movement that never took place when it could have made a difference. It’s never “anti-” enough when and where it needs to be here in Germany, in other words.

Are these 18,000+ Pegida protesters in Dresden all Nazis and racists? Of course not, although some of them undoubtedly will be. So why call them that? Especially when a recent study indicates that over 18 percent of the German population is hostile to Islam in the first place (is that all?). Do the political parties and media on the left – and elsewhere – profit from calling them Nazis? You tell me.

If they are all such idiots then why the hysteria? Do they possibly have something to say then after all? I’m slowly starting to wonder now.

One thing really does worry me about all these Pegida people, however. It is one of their slogans I heard about the other day: “Potatoes instead of Döner Kebab!” Now that’s scary. Maybe these folks do need to be stopped after all…

Um als Gesellschaft eine sinnvollere Reaktion zu finden, braucht es etwas Gelassenheit.