Smell That Coffee

Suddenly, for some odd reason, “LNG” is no longer a dirty word/acronym in German anymore. It used to mean “dirty, awful US-Amerikan fracking gas.”

It looks like they changed that definition recently so it probably won’t be long before the Germans will be explaining to the rest of the world how to do LNG the right way.

The Cabinet approves bill to speed up construction of LNG terminals – The Cabinet on Tuesday approved a bill to speed up the construction of floating and fixed LNG terminals and the pipelines needed to connect them to the gas grid. The Bundestag and Bundesrat still have to approve it.

Bad American Fracking LNG Suddenly Not That Bad After All

In Germany. Not nearly as bad as it was a few days ago, in fact. Just like that. It’s magic or something. It’s fracking inexplicable!

Germany Goes Ahead With First LNG Terminal to Cut Dependence on Russian Gas – Germany unveiled more details Saturday on its plan to build its first liquefied natural-gas terminals as it seeks to wean itself off its dependence on Russian gas.

The terminals are the latest step in Berlin’s diversification efforts that have been urgently ramped up in recent days following Russia’s attack on Ukraine. Germany gets around 55% of its gas from Moscow and has long been resistant to diversifying away from cheap and plentiful Russian energy supplies.

Germany last week halted the $11 billion Nord Stream 2 project, which would have doubled the capacity of an existing pipeline traveling along a similar route. The government also announced plans for gas and coal storage and commissioned its gas market trading hub to buy LNG for 1.5 billion euros, or the equivalent of $1.64 billion, from outside Russia.

Germans Don’t Frack Around

Germany is just about to make German fracking safer. In a country that doesn’t do any fracking in the first place, versteht sich (it’s understood). And they are going to make it safer by banning it altogether. Makes sense to me. When I concentrate really hard and try to think like a German, I mean (can’t do it for very long, though).


The new draft law, which now goes to parliament for approval, will impose an outright ban on fracking for shale gas in the next few years and only allow scientific test drilling under strict conditions to assess the risks and environmental impact.

The law could allow commercial shale gas fracking in exceptional cases from 2019 but only after successful test drilling and the approval of a special committee.

Germany’s gas industry has warned restricting fracking could increase the country’s dependence on imported energy at a time when geopolitical concerns, particularly over Ukraine, are growing.

The BDI industry lobby group described the new conditions as “completely over the top”.

Last year, gas imports from Russia accounted for 37 percent of Germany’s supply. Only 12 percent of Germany’s needs were covered by its own reserves, down from almost a fifth a decade earlier.

Fade To Frack

The EU’s reputation as a model of environmental responsibility may soon be history. The European Commission wants to forgo ambitious climate protection goals and pave the way for fracking — jeopardizing Germany’s touted energy revolution in the process.


The Commission’s move further isolates Germany. Merkel’s government, a “grand coalition” of her conservatives and the center-left Social Democratic Party (SPD), seeks to increase the share of renewables in the country’s energy mix to 60 percent by 2036.

Drink Your Fracking Beer Already

Uh oh. Germans are suddenly worried about their Reinheitsgebot or “German Beer Purity Law” again. And Fracking, I mean.


This has to do with the fact that fracking does not stick soley to the only ingredients that may be used in the production of beer: Water, barley and hops. As a matter of fact, I don’t even think that fracking uses barley and hops at all.

I’m interested in tradition, too, of course. But let’s face it, if you’re going to start quoting a 500-year-old “purity law,” quote it right: The law also set the price of beer at 1-2 Pfennig per Maß.

The Brauer-Bund beer association is worried that fracking for shale gas, which involves pumping water and chemicals at high pressure into the ground, could pollute water used for brewing and break a 500-year-old industry rule on water purity.

“Das Reinheitsgebot darf nicht beeinträchtigt werden. Es müssen alle Maßnahmen ergriffen werden, damit das Brauwasser geschützt wird.”

Alternative Energy Available In US-Amerika

Soaring German energy costs in the wake of the country’s transition to renewable energy have seen more and more firms thinking abut relocating their operations. The US looks like a sound alternative, associations claim.


And this even though everybody (everybody Green or SPD) knows that fracking is EVIL.

“If we don’t get on top of the country’s energy transition to renewables and are not able to rein in energy costs in the process, German industry’s competitiveness stands to suffer.”

This Was Not Planned So It Cannot Be Happening

Or will not be happening, I should say.


As you know, Germany is green. And Germans are greener than green. Why, Germans are so green that Jamaicans want to roll them up and smoke them.

And Germans also like sticking to “the plan,” too (think Stalingrad). So they do not, I repeat do not appreciate it when, as in this case, their ambitious environmental plans get disturbed by unforseen technological developments that were not considered in the original plan and therefore start turning the whole Schlamassel (mess) into a really, really big and annoying, well, Schlamassel (think Stalingrad again).

It goes like this: “Ambitious environmental goals are far less meaningful if the economy withers in achieving them.” So when something really tempting comes along like shale gas drilling (hydraulic fracturing or “fracking”), a technology that could give Germany access to enough reserves to feed natural gas demand for 20 years, then that gets not-so-thoroughly-green people (yes, there still are a few specimens left) to thinking, plan or not.

So there we have it. And that’s the end of it (ask any German Green Shirt). Fracking can’t happen here. It is ideologically inadmissable. Fracking is something that those crazy Americans and their evil multi-national oil companies do, not us (multi-national oil companies are always American, by the way – don’t ask). Nope, fracking can never happen here. Never in a million years. Not this year anyway.

“We are sitting on Swiss cheese. The risks are just too high.”