Germans Still Pretending That This Didn’t Happen

Honestly, how long have we been hearing that it isn’t a question of “if” a pandemic is coming, it is only a question of “when?”


Well, then here’s yet another example of government planning in action because Germany was caught with its Lederhose down big time when the coronavirus pandemic hit.

Take face masks. When not shipping off the few that they did have to China before realizing they needed them for themselves, or falsely accusing the United States of stealing face masks destined for them once the panic set in, Angela Merkel’s government spends a considerable amount of energy letting its state media outlets explain to the worried citizenry that face masks really aren’t that important anyway – while frantically trying to organize and produce them in the background.

So we all know what’s coming next. It’s right around the corner, folks. The German government will soon announce – once enough face masks are finally available – that although face masks are not absolutely, positively necessary to protect you during the pandemic you will nevertheless now be required to wear them any and every time you leave your apartment. But don’t thank us for being overly cautious like this, they will say, we only want to take every precaution necessary to keep you safe. They will soon want a pat on the back for not having done their job in the first place, in other words. A failure and a scam from start to finish. We’re here from the government and we’re here to help.

It’s now clear that the German government was ill-prepared for this pandemic, even though a 2012 risk analysis by the federal government sketched out a crisis scenario that is eerily similar to the current situation.

Smart Move

I guess. German city introduces face masks for shoppers as corona cases rise.


It’s just that the German government doesn’t have any face masks for the population. Nor does German industry. They shipped them all off to China as the pandemic began. No joke. Now Germans are forced to either make their face masks themselves or pay ridiculous prices for the few that are available until industrial production gets back up to speed again. Thank goodness for government planning.

The city of Jena in eastern Germany has decided to make people wear face masks when shopping or traveling by public transport, stepping up efforts to slow the spread of the coronavirus and becoming the first city in the country to introduce the measure.

Next Delay For Berlin Airport Opening Postponed Until 2018

German newspapers are reporting that the latest delay announcement expected for the opening of Berlin’s troubled old new airport will now push the currently planned postponement back until the spring of 2018.


Disappointed Berliners had been hoping that the next delay announcement could have come as late as the spring of 2017 but this will now have to be moved forward as a new round of cost overruns and construction errors have caused yet another delay for that next planned delay.

Rumor has it that the Berlin Brandenburg Klaus Wowereit International Airport had originally been set to open in 2011 but no one can be located who can verify this with any certainty anymore.

The official announcement for the delay of the delay has been postponed until next year.

“Mir ist keine Entscheidung zwischen Weihnachten und Neujahr bekannt.”

German Word Of The Day: Zwangsumlage

Zwangs- = compulsory. Umlage = levy, share in the costs. Put those two together and what do you get? Forced to share. But we’re talking about money here folks so let’s  just call it another tax and get it over with already.


This latest planned tax consists of forcing German households to purchase so-called “smart meters” or modern electricity meters that are supposed to regulate energy consumption by drawing electricity from that so wonderfully green German energy grid whenever this energy is cheaper. You know, like when hell freezes over?

This will only set back German consumers another 70 or 80 euros after already having been hit with a seven percent energy bill increase planned for next year, too (the seven can and will change, of course, and we all now in which direction it will be going).

Turn it around as much as you want. Anyway you turn this German energy turnaround around, you’ll always get the same result. Once you’ve turned it around, I mean. She is like way too expensive, señor.

But what can you expect from a government that is about to go retro and way back in the Wayback Machine to the good old days of SPD Never-Never Land again?

“Verbraucher sollten mit attraktiven Angeboten überzeugt, statt mit immer mehr ordnungsrechtlichen Einbaupflichten gezwungen werden.”

PS: The next German word of the day will be Abzocke. Here’s a tip: It means rip-off.