Fifteen Years!

Fifteen years? That’s what a “life sentence” in Germany means.

Crime

In other words, in Germany you get away with murder when convicted of murder.

A failed Iraqi asylum seeker has been handed life in prison for the rape and murder of a 14-year-old German girl.

Ali Bashar, 22, had admitted in court in Wiesbaden that he strangled Susanna Feldman on 23 May 2018, but claimed he did not know how it happened…

Susanna’s mother, Diana, said that “part of my future and my heart disappeared” when her daughter died. “I have already received life imprisonment, although I am not guilty. I will never get a chance for a pardon.”

Advertisements

Another Fifteen Years?

Whoah. This is getting heavy.

Life

German nurse who killed up to 100 patients faces another life sentence.

Thanks for the fake news there, CNN. There is no life sentence in Germany. They may call it that but that just means fifteen years. Just saying.

German prosecutors in the northwest city of Oldenburg are seeking a life sentence for Niels Hoegel, a former male nurse who is considered Germany’s deadliest postwar serial killer after allegedly killing as many as 100 patients…

Hoegel is accused of giving his victims various non-prescribed drugs, in an attempt to show off his resuscitation skills to colleagues and fight off boredom.

Germany Can’t Abolish The Death Penalty

It never had one to begin with (not since the war).

Death penalty

Germany abolishes death penalty in public vote. But please read a little further: The ballot was purely symbolic, because Germany’s federal constitution and European treaties mean the death penalty is already banned in the country as these override state law.

Germany is a country where lebenslänglich (a life sentence) is fifteen years and somebody wants to suggest that they have a death penalty here? It’s interesting fake news, I guess, but it’s fake news all the same.

“There was a fear if a terrible crime was committed… then the vote could do the wrong way.”

PS: And yes, despite that morbid theme, Happy Thanksgiving!

My Guess Is Argentina

US authorities have issued international arrest warrants for five former VW managers and developers for their role in the Dieselgate scandal.

VW

Nobody in Germany can seem to find them so, you know, just put two and two together. No, that doesn’t make five. But it comes close.

Under the constitution, German citizens can only be extradited to other European Union countries or to an international court. But leaving Germany could pose the risk of being extradited to the United States from a third country.

Erwartbare Konsequenz.”

More Tough Sentencing In Germany

The state court in Berlin convicted a group of young refugees from Syria and Libya on Tuesday who attempted to set fire to a sleeping homeless man at a subway station on Christmas last year. The oldest of the group, a 21-year-old Syrian man, was sentenced to two years and nine months in prison.

Crime

I guess the judges were being lenient like in that recent case in Cottbus. In Muslim countries it’s apparently OK to light people on fire so that needed to be taken into consideration, I assume.

But seriously, if were up to me and I were a judge here in Berlin I’d lock them up in the David Hasselhoff Museum and throw away the key.

No Joke

Little old ladies just don’t seem to understand the world we are now living in. Not that I do, either. But still.

Hate Crime

In Germany, you can be arrested and fined €1,350 for finding jokes like these funny (and then sharing it on your Facebook page): “Do you have anything against refugees? Yes. Machine guns and hand grenades.”

And using some lame excuse like “I like to pass on funny things” won’t help you out here one little bit, ma’am. You are guilty of hate crime. Hate crime, you ask? What is hate crime? Well, hate crime, when it comes to jokes, is kind of like thoughtcrime only… No, wait. It is thoughtcrime. That’s precisely what it is. Now just sit back and relax, ma’am. We will purge that abominable joke from your mind with the help of this little red button right here.

„Ich leite gern spaßige Sachen weiter.”

This Is Cruel And Unusual Punishment

If you don’t have an IN-N-OUT Burger or a Wendy’s in the area, I mean.

Prison

Police in the western German town of Bergisch Gladbach have been ordering takeaway McDonalds for inmates after a food supply contract fell through at the start of March, local media reported on Monday.

The inmates of the short term facility are given the choice of a hamburger, a cheeseburger or a veggieburger for lunch and a McToast with cheese, ham and bacon for breakfast, Cologne tabloid “Express” reported. Bigger burgers were reportedly too expensive.

Ein Polizeisprecher nennt die Regelung eine “pragmatische Lösung“. Man habe sich die Frage stellen müssen, wer in der Lage sei, “sieben Tage die Woche, morgens, mittags und abends Verpflegung zu stellen”.

Yoga Spend The Rest Of Your Life In Prison

Or at least a year or two of your life, if it’s a German prison. Maybe longer, even. But only if they keep you in for good behavior.

Yoga

Talk about your shocking, sickening and thoroughly unacceptable prison conditions.

The inmate conditions found at Heidering Prison about 20 miles south of Berlin, Germany would shock most Americans. The prison is surrounded by fences, not walls. The hallways are filled with light and inspiring views of the countryside beyond the perimeter. Thought-provoking artwork by inmates is on display. Prisoners walk the grounds in street clothes, practice yoga, take classes, and cook meals for themselves.

“I’ve been on a Google campus for other stories, and frankly, it reminded me very much of it.”

Spare The Cane And Spoil The Child

I mean the German tourist. Huh? What do you mean punishment, officer? All we did was break into a train depot and spray graffiti on some trains. In freakin’ Singapore!

Graffiti

A Singapore court has sentenced two German men to three strokes of the cane for spray-painting a metro train in the city-state notorious for its hardline rules on vandalism.

Nach deutschen Maßstäben ist das Urteil sicherlich hart, insbesondere die Prügelstrafe, die in unserem Kulturkreis ja schon lange nicht mehr angewendet wird.“

German Of The Day: Lebenslänglich

That means life-long, like in a life-long prison sentence?

Prison

That’s what this guy here got for killing that young woman there (and someone else not pictured), pretty much televised live. Actually, he got two life-long prison sentences. And that’s why he’s getting out of prison now because life-long in Germany, as in life-long prison sentence life-long, means 15 years and since he was sentenced in 1991 that means that, well, I dunno, he’s been in there a whole lot of years and it’s only fair that he be allowed to come out now, right?

Das Landgericht in Essen hatte die beiden Männer 1991 zu lebenslanger Haft verurteilt.