“It’s Not About Pressure”

“It’s about fairness.” And while we’re at it: War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.

Germany’s new COVID rules, explained – New rules are coming into force as Germany continues its battle against the coronavirus. Infection rates remain stable and many are ready to reopen — but 3 million remain unvaccinated, and health experts are still wary.

As of Monday, the cost of rapid antigen tests is no longer covered by the state… Starting November 1, unvaccinated people will not receive compensation for lost pay if coronavirus measures force them to quarantine…

“It is not about pressure, it is about fairness.”

Suffering From Incorrect Opinion?

Then we’ll be keeping a very close eye on you.

Similar to the way dissidents in the Banana Republic are labeled racists, fascists, white supremicists, etc. whenever they disagree with what they are force fed on mainstream media, Germans who think differently about their government’s repeatedly failed coronavirus restriction policies (officially sanctioned by German State Media, of course) are labled Nazis. The only difference is that they are then also placed under observation by the country’s Federal Office for the Protection of the Constitution. This is their FBI, sort of, although Thought Police seems more appropriate to me.

Germany puts anti-lockdown Querdenker group under observation – German intelligence chiefs have placed parts of the anti-coronavirus lockdown protest movement under observation.

PS: I assume that a certain group of German actors are now being closely monitored as well.

German Of The Day: Verweilverbot

That means, a ban on lingering. Pausing. Sitting on a park bench. Standing still and looking at trees. Stuff like that.

Verweilverbot

That is now forbidden in German cities like Düsseldorf because Big Brother is from the government and is here to help. To help you not spread the Coronavirus. I’m not making this up, people. If the people from the Ordnungsamt (Office of Order) see you sitting on a bench there admiring the Rhine or something you can and will be fined. Can’t wait for the new immunity passes to come out!

Verweilverbot: Nicht alle halten sich dran.

German Dogs Will Soon Be Forced To Take Better Care Of Their Owners

Dog owners are not just cuddly toys, mutts. They also have their own needs.

Dog

New Law Proposed in Germany Demands Dog Owners Take Pets on an Hour-Long Walk Twice a Day.

I’ve been told that another new proposed law would force German dogs to teach their owners to roll over and play dead every time the government asks them to but the political opposition insists that this would be unnecessary government intervention as this has already long been the case.

“They’ll be telling cat owners how often they need to change their litter trays next.”

We Must Know Where You Are At All Times

Unless you’re a criminal, of course. Then we don’t care.

Germany

German of the day: Anmeldungspflicht. That means the obligation of keeping the police up-to-date about your address.

Germans may finally be able to change their home address online — here’s why that matters – Anyone who has moved in Germany knows that changing your address entails a tangle of paperwork and city hall appointments. A new draft law hopes to smooth out the process, giving people the option to do it online.

“The digitalization of administrative work is running at full speed.”

German Of The Day: Umerziehen

That means re-educate.

Umerziehen

And that’s what the “framing” expert at Germany state TV “Channel One” (ARD) has advised its employees to do. Viewers are in dire need of re-education.

Her secret “framing manual” indicates that the ARD is at war with its critics and private television channels alike, disruptive elements who refer to the ARD as “state TV,” criticize “compulsory fees” (they’re not compulsory, they’re a show of solidarity!) and “question the ARD’s relevance.” Gee, I guess she means me, too.

These disruptive elements don’t understand that the ARD is “guided by moral principles” and its own “moral necessity for social interaction” and not, like them, motivated by profit. The ARD doesn’t have to be motivated by profit, people. All Germans get taxed for this state supported media bias whether they’re viewers or not.

Isn’t that a nice smirk? Big Sister is watching. She wants you all to keep on watching, that is.

Die Arbeit der ARD, so heißt es, sei „von moralischen Prinzipien getragen“, überzeugt von der eigenen „moralischen Notwendigkeit für das gesellschaftliche Miteinander“ – während die „medienkapitalistischen Heuschrecken“ des Privat-TV nur dem Profit dienen würden.

German Hate Speech Law Keeps Reaching New Levels

Of absurdity, I mean. Now satirical publications are up for grabs.

Fake

When a German neo-Nazi politician tweeted that German police were trying to “to appease the barbaric, Muslim, rapist hordes of men,” her account was briefly suspended — but when the satirical magazine Titanic put up its own tweet mocking the Nazi, their account was suspended, too…

Prior to the law’s passage, free speech advocates warned that this would happen, and Angela Merkel personally promised it wouldn’t. It only took three days for the first case to come to light.

Government regulation in action. You know the deal, folks. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

“The last few days have emphatically shown that private companies cannot correctly determine whether a questionable online statement is illegal, satirical or tasteless yet still democratically legitimate.”

What Goes Around…

Couldn’t have happened to a nicer Big Brother.

Maas

Germany’s justice minister has fallen victim to the rules he himself championed against online social media, as one of his tweets was deleted following several complaints, Bild daily reported Monday.

The tweet dated back to 2010, when Heiko Maas was not yet a minister.

In the post, he had called Thilo Sarrazin, a politician who wrote a controversial book on Muslim immigrants, “an idiot”.

In der Debatte um das Netzwerkdurchsetzungsgesetz (NetzDG) wird Heiko Maas von einem Tweet eingeholt, den er vor sieben Jahren verfasst hat. Durch das neue Gesetz, das der SPD-Politiker und Bundesjustizminister entworfen hat, sollen strafbare Äußerungen im Internet schneller gelöscht werden.

No Joke

Little old ladies just don’t seem to understand the world we are now living in. Not that I do, either. But still.

Hate Crime

In Germany, you can be arrested and fined €1,350 for finding jokes like these funny (and then sharing it on your Facebook page): “Do you have anything against refugees? Yes. Machine guns and hand grenades.”

And using some lame excuse like “I like to pass on funny things” won’t help you out here one little bit, ma’am. You are guilty of hate crime. Hate crime, you ask? What is hate crime? Well, hate crime, when it comes to jokes, is kind of like thoughtcrime only… No, wait. It is thoughtcrime. That’s precisely what it is. Now just sit back and relax, ma’am. We will purge that abominable joke from your mind with the help of this little red button right here.

„Ich leite gern spaßige Sachen weiter.”

German Trust In Media Rises Sharply After Being Told That German Trust in Media Rises Sharply

German told their trust in newspapers soars to record level.

Trust

After being told that a total of 55.7 percent of respondents to a study said they trust the print press, a total of 55.7 percent of respondents to the study said they trust the print press, a drastic rise on the 45.7 percent of respondents who gave that response in 2015, they were told, and the highest level of trust since the survey was first conducted in 2000, somebody told them, too. Or so I’ve been told.

Noch nie seit über 15 Jahren war das Vertrauen in die Presse so hoch wie heute. Den deutschen Medien ist es gelungen, das in sie gesetzte Vertrauen zu stärken und weiter auszubauen.