It’s always the same.
Havin’ a nervous breakdown, a-drive me insane.
“I’m taking a German course this summer, then I’m emigrating.”
Category Archives: Heconomy
Mutti Looks Mad
Some say it has something to do with Greece or something.
A small majority of Germans now want Greece out of the single currency, while an overwhelming majority believe that Europe shouldn’t offer Athens any new concessions to keep it in the bloc, according to a new poll from the German broadcaster ZDF.
Euroländer bereiten sich auf Griechenland-Pleite vor
Speaking Of Friends…
This guy gives me gas for some reason.
And he gives Germany some 35 percent of their natural gas, too (not that mine isn’t). AND he’s got this big cat-shit eating grin on his face right now because he just warned them (and the rest of Europe) about the big Versorgungslücke (gas supply gap) that will soon be hitting them but not to worry one little bit because I got all the gas you want for you right here, pal.
Thank goodness countries like Germany thought ahead and only import a mere 35 percent of the natural gas they need from Russia. Otherwise a dangerous dependency might have developed that could have eventually even threatened the Energiewende itself!
Gazprom warnt “Träumer” im Westen vor Gas-Engpass
Greece Worried Eurozone Could Collapse
And Greece is willing to help.
Greek prime minister Alexis Tsipras has just pointed out to Merkel, Hollande & Co. that his country, accounting for a whopping 2% of the eurozone’s economy, is now finally ready to lend officials in Brussels all the money they will need in the turbulent times to come. Provided, of course, that they hand it all over to Greece first (along with a couple zillion euros on top for administrative fees).
Let’s get this over with, people.
„Es wäre der Anfang vom Ende der Eurozone.“ Tsipras warnte, dass die Kosten für die europäischen Steuerzahler enorm seien.
This Is Like Work Or Something
Exhausted from all of the political activism activity anti-G7 political activists have been expected to do already, bone-weary protestors are now leaving the G7 conference in droves before someone asks them to get even more politically active than they already have been.
“Like, I had to sit-in for over two full hours yesterday and hold up this stupid sign the whole time, too,” said one disillusioned demonstrator, his red cardboard nose still being sweat upon profusely. “OK, sure, after having slept-in twelve hours after that party the night before first, but still. If I had known this was going to be work I would never have left Berlin to come down here in the first place. These are like Manchester capitalist sweatshop demonstrating conditions! I’m outta here.”
“You know, all of this, it’s exhausting.”
I Got Your FIFA For You Right Here
The German government sent a shipment of rocket-propelled grenades to Saudi Arabia in order to secure support for their bid to host the 2006 World Cup, according to the latest sensational claims in the FIFA scandal.
German newspaper Die Zeit say the country’s Football Association arranged for then Chancellor Gerhard Schroder’s administration to supply the arms in order to swing the Saudi vote from Morocco to Germany ahead of the vote in 2000.
Die Regierung von Gerhard Schröder beschloss eine Woche vor der WM-Vergabe die Lieferung von Panzerfäusten an Saudi-Arabien. Deutschland habe “kurzfristig das Waffenembargo aufgehoben”, sagte Guido Tognoni, damals Fifa-Mitarbeiter, später.
Stop TTIP! Save The Climate! Fight Poverty!
And while you’re at it down there, folks… Faster horses! Younger women! Older whiskey! And more money!
It’s time to gear up for G7 demonstration time. Jeepers creepers. This is going to be like Blockupy, Burning Man and Woodstock all rolled up into one! And to really give that special psychedelic touch, let’s do it in German.
The main demonstration was due to kick off at 1200 GMT in the state capital Munich, around 100 kilometres (60 miles) north of the Alpine venue where Chancellor Angela Merkel is to welcome leaders from the club of rich nations from Sunday.
Stop G7 Elmau!
Redistribution Is Da Solution (Again)
The next step backwards: Berlin has a new law prohibiting landlords from demanding rents that are more than 10 percent higher than the area average, in an attempt to keep housing affordable in a city that’s attracting 50,000 new residents a year. The rule relies on a disputed index — known as the Mietspiegel — that critics say is a statistical crapshoot.
“The rent brake is essentially a transfer of wealth from landlords to tenants. Berlin will become less of a destination for international investors because capital doesn’t like to be constrained.”
We’re Number One!
When it comes to not having children.
A new study has determined that Germany not only has the lowest birth rate in Europe, it has the lowest birth rate on Planet Earth itself. In the past five years Germany has managed to produce a less than whopping 8.3 children per 1000 inhabitants. That edges the country past the previous Japanese champions who apparently couldn’t keep their hands off each other during the same period and now squeeze out some 8.4 children per 1000 inhabitants.
But what’s this with these .3 and .4 kids, gals?
Meanwhile, in an unrelated story… Another study indicates that Germany will face a massive labor deficit by the year 2030. In a mere 15 years, that is, between 6.1 and 7.8 million workers will be missing in the country.
And it could get worse. Large sections of the German population just disappear out of nowhere here from time to time, too.
Danach wurden in den vergangenen fünf Jahren im Durchschnitt 8,3 Kinder je 1000 Einwohner geboren. Das liegt unter dem Niveau des bisherigen Schlusslichts Japan von 8,4 Kindern je 1000 Einwohner.
German Film May Have Foreshadowed Hitler…
As claimed in the book “From Caligari to Hitler: A Psychological History of the German Film.” But no force in the universe could possibly have foreshadowed, much less foreseen this latest greatest new and refreshing delicious taste treat snack: Hitler Ice Cream.
From India. I guess you had to have been there. To get it, I mean.
Hitler Ice Cream. Mad, I mean made like no other. This gives “you scream, I scream, we all scream for ice cream” a whole new meaning.
The ice cream packaging has a photo of Hitler along with a Swastika-shaped top hat, which is somewhat at odds with his furious expression and full military paraphernalia.
Observing Hermann 