Like duh. What’s the big deal? Aren’t they all?
The pop singer loved looking at her headless body.
Rihanna jokes her boobs are ‘biggest they’ll ever be’ on trip to Berlin to see giant statue of herself in a bikini.
Category Archives: High Art
Would Kilgore Trout Tell A Lie?
It’s special ebook offer time again already, folks. Deal with it.
Dumb Deutsch: Absurd German Language Errors (auch für deutsche Leser geeignet)
Also at iTunes, Smashwords, Barnes & Noble, etc. For a limited time only or something.
“Very funny book, relating dumb things people say while trying out their high school German. Laughing so hard at my normally quiet workplace I had tears in my eyes, my boss walked by and asked if I was OK. Oh yeah! She has a great sense of humor with an eye toward languages. Buy this book and laugh yourself silly!”
German Of The Day: Butt and Fuchs
Butt is a short form for halibut (although in this case it’s just somebody’s name). Fuchs means fox. Not like anybody cares here.
Linus Butt and Florian Fuchs were part of a German team that destroyed their Canadian opponents 6-2 in a group stage fixture on Saturday in Rio de Janeiro.
Footage shows the two men standing standing with their backs to the camera during the game with the surnames on their shirts side-by-side.
But Twitter immediately reacted with one user, Kris Kristensen, posting the image along with the caption: ‘This one’s for the 12 year old in all of us.’
Girls Just Want To Have Fun
“I always knew that German tourists were a laugh a minute but this number here nearly KILLED me!”
Five young German women were arrested after a flash mob stunt at a Spanish resort sparked a terror alert, police said Wednesday (Aug 3).
The five caused a stampede in Platja d’Aro in the northeastern region of Catalonia late Tuesday when one of them pretended to be a celebrity and the rest chased after her, whooping and screaming as they tried to snap her paparazzi-style…
Eleven people needed treatment for bruising and panic attacks.
The stunt occurred on the heels of an assault in the French Riviera resort of Nice on July 14 in which a man killed 84 people by ramming them with a truck.
Angeblich sollte dabei die Verfolgungsjagd eines Prominenten durch Paparazzi simuliert werden.
Money For Nothing
But no chicks for free.
Speaking of debt… Here’s the state of the state today, folks. If you’re not one of us, if you’re the German government, for example, you can actually make money with your debt.
The German state profited from incurring more debt in the first half of this year, a newspaper report showed on Monday.
State bonds issued with negative interest rates flushed around 1.5 billion euros ($1.68 billion) into federal coffers, as total interest spending dropped from 9.7 to seven billion, the “Bild” daily reported.
German government bonds with a maturity of up to 10 years currently carry a negative interest rate, which means investors, who would traditionally expect a return on their investment, actually pay to own them.
Was This The Same Lady Who Threw Away Somebody Else’s “Installation” At Another Museum A Few Years Back?
An elderly German woman was questioned by police after filling in blank spaces on a crossword puzzle that was being displayed as a work of art at a local museum.
The BBC reports that the 91-year-old woman used a ballpoint pen to write on the work of art titled “Reading-work-piece” by avant garde artist Arthur Koepcke during a senior citizens tour to Nuremberg’s Neues Museum.
If she thought it was rubbish, it means it was. Art should be understood by everyone — including cleaners.
Pokémon Go Away
Pah-lease. And don’t let the door hit you on the way out.
Pokémon Go has officially arrived in Germany, and that means you’re going to be on the hunt for at least the next few days/months. But if you’re anything like us, you probably don’t want to give up partying to become a full-time trainer. Fortunately, if you live in Berlin, you can do both, as the city’s clubs have their own wild Pokémon types, gyms and PokéStops. Of course, some are better than others, and that’s why we went out into the field to check out which clubs in Berlin are best suited for the aspiring Pokémaster.
Germans Pulling For France In Tonight’s Semi-Final
That’s tonight’s France versus Germany match, folks.
“Of course there is more at stake than football. France is feeling its economic weakness and it must look on enviously as the whole of Europe becomes more German.”
“A victory over Germany would be far more than a game won. It would be an act of liberation… A strengthened France helps Europe and the Germans.”
“One heart says France has suffered enough, so many dead from terrorism, the economy is in decline, 10 percent unemployment. France needs some solace.”
I haven’t read otherwise so I’m going to go way out on the limb here and bet you that the French are pulling for France tonight, too.
Die Deutschen selbstbewusst, mit einer seit Langem bewährten Führung, erfolgsverwöhnt nach einschneidenden Reformen, die jetzt schon über ein Jahrzehnt zurückliegen. Also: Klinsmann gleich Schröder und Löw gleich Merkel. Die Franzosen hingegen verunsichert und krisenbelastet, mit einer seit vielen Jahren erfolglosen Führung ohne klare Linie. Ihr heutiger Trainer Didier Deschamps, wie Präsident François Hollande seit 2012 im Amt, wechselt so beständig die Systeme auf dem Platz wie sein Präsident die politische Taktik im Élysée-Palast.
Whaddya Mean 501 German Oddities For Only 99 Cents?
Why that’s almost 5.060606060606061 oddities per penny!
What a steal.
Just ask Marina. If you happen to know her, I mean:
“Hermann, thank you for your blog and books, I am hooked. I recently picked up 501 German Oddities and couldn’t stop laughing. I am German, but live in Boston with my husband, who is from the area and grew up here. We cracked up so many times and just had a blast reading your book. It was actually eye opening at times to the both of us and explained some “odd” behaviors of mine to him. Super grateful for the book and can’t wait to see more blog entries. All the best, Marina.”
Limited time offer or something.
PS: Also available at Smashwords, iTunes, etc.
Volkswagen To Build E-Cars
But they haven’t figured out how to equip them with diesel emissions test cheating software yet.
The sleazy, crooked, dirtball of a company also hopes to introduce more self-driving vehicles in the near future. If those work out, self-purchasing models will be the next logical step. And after that, who knows? The Welt or something.
Volkswagen unveiled a plan for the next decade containing culture change, as it strives to compete in an industry moving towards e-cars, self-driving systems and on-demand mobility – all while it deals with Dieselgate.
Mit Elektroautos in die Zukunft!
Observing Hermann 