Nobody wants to see us naked anymore!

Kids these days. No respect.

German naturists fear for future of lifestyle amid falling interest – Celebrations cancelled due to low uptake as people go off public nudity in country known for liberal attitudes.

An organisation promoting nudity and a self-confident approach towards the body in Germany has sounded the alarm over the future of naturism in the country.

The German Association for Free Body Culture (DFK), an umbrella organisation for myriad naturist interest groups, has told its members that celebrations in August marking the anniversary of its creation will no longer go ahead owing to a lack of interest.

Membership of the DFK has slumped from 65,000 people 25 years ago to fewer than 34,000 now, with many remaining members said to be losing interest.

Write this down and look back in a year from now…

And nothing, absolutely nothing will have changed.

The people who say it know it. The people who hear it know it. The people who commit these crimes know it.

Germany’s Scholz vows to step up deportations after killing of police officer – The stabbing of an officer by a suspect from Afghanistan has put the chancellor under pressure to take a tougher stance on migration ahead of the EU election.

The gruesome killing of a police officer by a 25-year-old Afghan suspect has put German Chancellor Olaf Scholz under renewed pressure to take a tougher stance on migration days ahead of a European election in which the far right is expected to make sizeable gains.

Germany is also thinking about offering free beer for everybody…

But that ain’t gonna happen either.

Germany is thinking about bringing back conscription – But the chancellor is reluctant.

“Kriegstüchtig” does not trip easily off the English tongue. Nor does it fall easily on German ears. Translated roughly as “war-ready”, it is a word deployed by Boris Pistorius, the defence minister, to describe his favoured destination for the long under-resourced Bundeswehr, or armed forces. Money is now pouring in, and Mr Pistorius is overhauling the Bundeswehr’s structures. But like many of its nato allies, Germany is struggling to find enough willing recruits. The minister is among many who want Germany to consider restoring conscription, suspended since 2011, to get the numbers up.

We’ll be ready for war by 2129

I mean 2029, of course.

But only if nothing unforeseen happens. Like war, or something.

German defense minister calls for war readiness by 2029 – Germany’s Boris Pistorius has said the country needs to prepare for a worst-case scenario regarding the specter of war in Europe. He also said a return to some form of military conscription would likely be necessary.

Germans demands…

Will not be met.

Nothing will change here. Because… “Every country has the government it deserves.” See US-Amerika (AKA The Banana Republic) if you don’t believe me.

Germans demand that their government restricts migration to prevent further attacks after an Afghan knifeman killed a police officer and stabbed five others at a political rally – Sulaiman Ataee, 25, launched a frenzied attack in Mannheim city centre on Friday, stabbing well-known Islam critic Michael Stuerzenberger, police officer Rueven L, 29, and several bystanders in a horrific incident which was live streamed on YouTube.

Residents in the city in the state of Baden-Wuerttemberg are outraged over the attack, with many demanding stricter rules on immigration.

April Fools’ Day jokes in June?

And not particularly funny, either.

Berlin’s BER wins award for best airport in Europe – Berlin’s infamous BER airport has won the title of the best airport in Europe, according to a ranking by the UK-based travel portal Eurochange…

The airport scored particularly high in three considered categories; punctuality of departing and arriving flights, attractions for children and the cost of beer.

German of the day: Islamkritische Bewegung

That means a movement critical of Islam.

But I don’t think they mean the movement of that guy’s knife.

Video shows anti-Islam activist among those stabbed in Germany knife attack – Videos shared on social media showed a man attacking several people with a knife in the southwest German city of Mannheim on Friday. The city’s police force confirmed the incident and said three people, including one officer, were injured but there was no further danger to the public as the suspect was apprehended.

The police did not immediately provide any information about the severity of the injuries or the identities of those involved, but one of those stabbed was a prominent German far-right political activist and critic of Islam, Michael Stürzenberger.

Nor do the police know yet what the motive of the attack was. Honest. No joke.

Here’s your opportunity!

To find a job in a country that has…

some of the lowest salaries in Europe,
the highest taxes in Europe (if not in the world),
the highest social “contributions” (taxes) in Europe,
some of the lowest retirement pensions in Europe (unless you’re a civil servant),
the highest energy prices in Europe,
the highest water and sewage costs in Europe,
some of the highest real estate taxes and related bureaucratic costs in Europe,
some of the highest rents and real estate prices in Europe and
a catastrophic lack of available apartments.
I’ll stop there. For now.

So don’t miss out on this opportunity, millennials!

Desperate for millennial talent, Germany launches ‘Opportunity Card’ giving migrants a year to look for a job – Between an aging population and an economy in seemingly perennial stagnation, Germany faces some major challenges. Could a visa aimed at attracting more young, hungry workers be the answer?

Germany is set to launch an “Opportunity Card” just in time for the summer, aimed at young foreign workers hoping either to eventually secure a long-term job or simply work in the country for a while.

“Chronic overwork?”

In the German army?

Damn. Dodging responsibility is more stressful than I imagined.

German army officer jailed for spying for Russia – A German military officer has been sentenced to three-and-a-half years in prison for spying for Russia.

The man, identified only as Thomas H, had been a captain in the army’s procurement office when he contacted Russian embassy in Berlin and passed on secret military information…

The man claimed that chronic overwork had impaired his ability to think critically about his actions.

Chill already

Please.

You climate criminals.

Alarm as German climate activists charged with ‘forming a criminal organisation’ – Action against Letzte Generation could have ‘immense chilling effect’ on climate protest, campaigners say…

According to prosecutors in the state of Brandenburg, the charges relate to more than a dozen “attacks” against oil refineries, the Berlin-Brandenburg airport and the Museum Barberini, in Potsdam, between April 2022 and May 2023.

The incidents include protests in which supporters of the group attempted to switch off oil pumping stations leading to the refinery, blocked airport runways and threw mashed potatoes at an oil painting by Monet.

Prosecutors said the charges applied to a subgroup of Letzte Generation, a Germany-wide campaign that has led to thousands of arrests in the past two years.