Well, which one is it you arrested?

King Peter I, the Son of Man or the Messiah?

Germany Arrests King Peter I, the Son of Man, the Messiah – Peter identified sources of frustration and indignity that might bother virtually any German: how one navigates banking, taxation, health care, law.

Last week, Germany arrested Peter Fitzek, 59, an anti-government figure also known as King Peter I, the Son of Man, the Messiah. Historically, attempts to arrest messiahs have met with mixed results, so to stay on the safe side, the Interior Ministry not only rolled up Fitzek and three conspirators but also shut down his whole operation, known as the Kingdom of Germany. Subjects of King Peter deny the legitimacy of the Federal Republic of Germany and, over the past 13 years, have built up a counter-state with its own institutions. “In Germany, just like in the rest of the world,” he said, “We have a lot of problems,”

German of the day: Schneckentempo

That means moving at a snail’s pace.

But at least it’s still movement. In the right direction.

Germany drops opposition to nuclear power in rapprochement with France – Paris wins approval from Berlin to remove anti-nuclear bias in EU legislation, say officials.

Germany has dropped its long-held opposition to nuclear power, in the first concrete sign of rapprochement with France by Berlin’s new government led by conservative Chancellor Friedrich Merz.

Berlin has signalled to Paris it will no longer block French efforts to ensure nuclear power is treated on par with renewable energy in EU legislation, according to French and German officials.

Roots

Merz woos Trump with invitation to German ancestral village – The chancellor appears to want to appeal to the American president’s German ancestry in order to improve frayed relations.

Check out this pre-Trump hysteria film report about this village (Heinz came from here too). Start watching around 34:50. It’s positive. It’s friendly. Times (and attitudes) change.

Delusions of Grandeur V9.0

Version 9 as in nein as in it ain’t never gonna happen.

Aiming to strengthen the Bundeswehr to match the size and punch of a medium-sized American city’s police force…

Germany’s Merz vows to build Europe’s strongest army – “Our friends and partners also expect this from us, and what’s more, they are actually demanding it,” said the new chancellor.

Good thing the American pension system works

Only it doesn’t. None of them work.

It’s the 800-pound gorilla locked away in every country’s closet – for now.

Germany struggles to fix its pension system – Germany’s aging population is putting the country’s pension system under strain. The new Labor Minister Bärbel Bas has ruffled feathers with a proposal for how to fix it.

Good luck with that.

German Greens seek relevance through innovation

Still losing votes after their recent attempt to ban fire, Germany’s Greens are now taking a more innovative approach to reduce the country’s carbon footprint by launching a newly discovered Neanderthal technology.

Wooden spears made of spruce and pine will now be used to fend off wolf attacks while collecting nuts and berries in the pristine German forest. Gunfire is way too yucky.

Neanderthals were not, after all, the brutish loners of early scientific portrayals. Instead, they too may have been innovative, social hunters with advanced toolmaking and social strategies, just like the Greens of today.

German of the day: Märchenwald

That means fairytale forest.

You know, the German Brothers Grimm kind. The kind Germans these days level for wind parks.

Plan for windfarm in German ‘fairytale forest’ stokes green energy culture war – Far right accused of misinformation over turbines at Reinhardswald, which has left local people divided.

Deep in the woods that inspired the Brothers Grimm, past the tower from which Rapunzel threw down her hair and the castle in which Sleeping Beauty slumbered, lies a construction site that the far right has declared a crime against national soil and identity.

In this quiet corner of Germany’s “fairytale forest”, workers are clearing land and building access roads to erect 18 wind turbines.