German Of The Day: Antidemokratisch

That means antidemocratic.

Quotas

Women in Germany won the right to vote in 1918, but a century later they still do not enjoy equal representation. Though the country is led by a woman — who will, most likely, be succeeded by another woman — fewer than a third of the members of the federal Parliament, the Bundestag, are female.

That’s why leading figures from all major German parties are now calling for parity: a 50-50 quota for male and female representatives in the Bundestag and the 16 state-level Parliaments. But is achieving a gender balance in Germany’s legislatures worth weakening another hard-fought accomplishment, the right to free electoral choice?

In a word, no.

Der gute Zweck heiligt nicht den Zwang.

This Is A Bad Hair Day

For hair everywhere. Especially in the Bundeswehr. German court rules goth soldier must get a hair cut.

Goth

Sorry, pal. But a man’s goth to do what he’s goth to do. At least those cute Bundeswehr chicks goth off the hook…

The soldier, a member of Germany’s Gothic scene who wants to wear his hair long, considered the armed services law discriminatory because it allows women to wear long hair, but not men.

Men in previous ages wore their hair long, argued the 51-year-old who works in the defense ministry in Bonn. He said ancient, long-haired warriors were thought to have a particular masculinity, so he did not understand why only women were currently allowed to wear their hair long.

“Fashionable hairstyles are allowed, provided they are not particularly conspicuous in cut or shape, such as mohawk, ornamental or sidecuts.”

How Sexist Or Something

The Berlin International Film Festival will sign the 50/50 by 2020 gender parity pledge,

Gender

So, like, let me get this straight. You are ASSuming that there are only TWO genders or what, Herr Dieter Kosslick with the dopey hat? You’re going to get letters, pal. Some might have explosives in them, too.

At first I thought they meant 50/50 with regard to the quality of the films they show here at the Berlinale. You know, 50 percent crappy and the other 50 percent really crappy? But I was way off, as usual.

The 50/50 by 2020 pledge does not mandate gender quotas, but calls for festivals to strive for gender parity in top management and for them to publish figures on the gender of the directors of films submitted every year.

Speaking Of Mangelhaft…

As reported yesterday, the guy in charge of inspecting the Bundeswehr has given it yet another inadequate (mangelhaft) rating.

Steinmeier

Now the President of Germany himself, that guy up there, forget his name, can  personally confirm this. He is currently gestrandet (stranded) in Ethiopia after making a state visit because his Bundeswehr One or whatever the hell they call it is, well, she is broken.

Anybody know anybody passing through Ethiopia the next few days who might be willing to pick up the President of Germany and bring him to the nearest bus station or something?

Die Unglücksserie bei den deutschen Regierungsfliegern reißt nicht ab. Nach Entwicklungsminister Müller sitzt nun auch Bundespräsident Steinmeier zeitweise in Afrika fest. Ein Defekt an seiner Airbus-Maschine muss erst noch repariert werden.

German Of The Day: Mangelhaft

That means inadequate.

Mangelhaft

And that’s what Germany’s Wehrbeauftragter (Defense Commissioner) has to say about the conditions of Germany’s Bundeswehr. It’s still inadequate. I know this isn’t news or anything but it’s a cool word, don’t you think?

Funny, the Bundeswehr has been inadequate for as long as anyone can remember. At what point can you safely conclude that this inadequacy is intentional?

“Die Lage der Bundeswehr als „nach wie vor mangelhaft.”

Don’t They Know That Walls Don’t Work?

Denmark’s agriculture ministry Monday announced that the government has started to construct a fence along the border with Germany to keep wild boar from entering the country.

Boars

Once completed — which should be done by the fall of this year — the Danish fence could stretch for nearly 70 kilometers.

Germany, more advanced in matters like this, would never dream of putting up a wall on it’s border.

“We have 11 billion good reasons to do everything we can to prevent African swine fever reaching Denmark.”

Exit? What Exit?

What Angela Merkel’s exit means for Germany — and Europe.

Merkel

Hilarious! Merkel’s announcement comes at a pivotal time when nationalism is on the rise in Europe and the continent is still reeling from the 2015 migrant crisis.

Whah? Huh? She caused the 2015 migrant crisis. She is therefore directly responsible for this rise in nationalism you are so concerned about. And she ain’t going nowhere, either. She’s already hand-picked her Mini-MErkel to take the reins should anyone ever figure out how to get her to actually go away (other than at gunpoint).

All I can say is… German oddity 5. Young adults in Germany have never known a chancellor other than Angela Merkel. She has been in office since 2005. It’s time to go. It’s been time to go for quite some time now even. Geh mit Gott (go with God) but go. And don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Even I Can See That These Are Fakes

A. HitPer? Never heard of him.

Hitper

Three watercolour paintings attributed to the former Nazi leader Adolf Hitler have been seized by German police.

The works were up for sale at the Kloss auction house in Berlin, but taken on suspicions of forgery, police say.

“Wir verwahren uns mit aller Entschiedenheit dagegen, dass uns von unberufener Seite eine Nähe zum nationalsozialistischen Gedankengut allein deswegen unterstellt wird, weil wir – ähnlich wie andere Auktionshäuser weltweit, gerade auch in Deutschland – Gegenstände aus dem Nachlass Hitlers versteigern.”