Accidents Do Happen

September 24, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, High Art, History, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hustle (Hoax), Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Accidents, German, Germans, Germany, History, Humor, Jokes, Nazis, Swastikas Leave a comment

A German construction company has apologized to the city of Goslar after laying bricks in the shape of a swastika at a new shopping center there (this is the town that finally got up enough civil courage to revoke Adolf Hitler of his honorary citizenship last year, after all).

The builders claim that the shape of the bricks was purely accidental but when trying to contact the particular worker responsible to ask him about some other shapes discovered at the shopping center (the Nazi party eagle, several pairs of SS bolts and a big “I Love Adolf” mosaic) he could no longer be found for questioning.

“We have no leads, we are keeping our options open and investigating. We are speaking to the building firm responsible for the new footpath. They claim it was not deliberate but just an innocent mistake, and have already changed it.”

As If Nazi Streakers At World Cup Games Weren’t Bad Enough

June 22, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Helplessness, High Art, History, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Computer Games, Football, German, Germans, Germany, Nazis, Shooters, Soccer, Streakers, The Beatles, Wolfenstein, World Cup Leave a comment

And they are.

The Beatles themselves are now being forced to sing in German for Adolf Hitler.

In a controversial new computer game thingy, I mean.

“It was very important to us to create a credible soundtrack for Wolfenstein. We wanted to capture the tone of this alternate universe where the Nazis won World War II.”

This Detergent Will Get Your Clothes Whiter Than White

May 9, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Hate, Heconomy, Helplessness, Higher Education, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Advertising, Ariel, Detergent, German, Germans, Germany, Hitler, Humor, Nazis, Neo-Nazis, Satire Leave a comment

A detergent just got pulled in Germany over a neo-Nazi code? Uh, OK.

The use of Nazi slogans in public is banned in Germany, which neo-Nazis often try to circumvent by using codes. They use “88” to represent the phrase “Heil Hitler,” because “H” is the eighth letter of the alphabet. Similarly, “18” is used to stand for “A.H.” or Adolf Hitler.

Wow or something. I’ll wait until they come out with a product labeled “23-7-1-19” before I start getting all excited. That’s code for “W.G.A.S” or “Who gives a shit?”

“Für ein reines Deutschland.”

Like, We’re Gonna Like You With A Like-Attack

May 7, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Hate, Higher Education, History, Home Cooking, Humor Tags: Facebook, German, Germans, Germany, Laut Gegen Nazis, Likes, Nazis, NPD Leave a comment

Whether you like it or not.

So how you like that?

We’re going to infiltrate the NPD with foreign blood!

You Gotta Have Principles

March 30, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, High Art, Home Cooking, Humor, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy Tags: German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Ina Groll, Kitty Blair, Nazis, Neo-Nazis, NPD, Porn Stars, Pornos, Racism, Stupidity 1 Comment

Especially when you’re Germany’s leading neo-Nazi party, I mean.

An NPD porn star was dropped by her party after it was discovered that she had filmed a sex scene with a black man.

“I mean, say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.”

Forbidding Stuff Makes It Go Away

March 1, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Higher Education, History, Hurt Feelings Tags: Bans, Censorship, Films, German, Germans, Germany, Nazis, Propaganda, YouTube Leave a comment

Right? In Germany it does. Or it’s supposed to, at least. But it doesn’t work here either, of course.

Take old Nazi films apparently easily available on YouTube, for instance. “Experts” are now shocked to find that it is possible to view them on the Internet, even though such films were placed “on the index” in Germany long ago. Reminds us of the Mein Kampf–Krampf (convulsion), doesn’t it?

Let’s face it, if we really want to forbid something it ought to be stupidity. Before that works, forbidding films is a questionable undertaking at best. I think the Libertarians sum that up nicely: “If there is no good reason to forbid something (a good reason being that it violates the rights of others), it should be allowed.”

Or do these films, as sad and stupid as they are, violate your rights?

Müssen Filme überhaupt verboten werden?

An Anti-Semitic Caricature?

February 26, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, History, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Anti-Semitism, Caricatures, Facebook, Jews, Journalism, Mark Zuckerberg, Nazis, Newspapers, Technophobia 3 Comments

In Germany? Today? No way.

Or way?

Hard to say.

Uh. German anti-Facebook technophobia is one thing, but like what on earth were they thinking (or drinking?) over there at the Süddeutsche Zeitung when they put out this one?

“If anyone has any doubts about the anti-Semitic dimension of the cartoon, we can point to Mark Zuckerberg’s very prominent nose, which is not the case in real life.”

Where Have All The Nazis Gone?

February 13, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hideology, History, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings Tags: Action Groups, Bombings, Demonstrations, Dresden, German, Germans, Germany, Nazis, Neo-Nazis, Police Leave a comment

What has become of Germany? You can’t even count on mindless herds of Neo-Nazis anymore.

In Dresden, I mean. For their annual “Bombenholocaust” (bombing of Dresden) get-together. Up to 6500 showed up in recent years but that doesn’t appear to be the case anymore. It might have something to do with the two zillion police out on the streets but I’m just guessing here. OK, OK. And the Bürgerinitiativen (citizen’s action groups), too.

Am Donnerstag ist es wieder mal so weit – aber nach Lage der Dinge wird alles anders sein als in den Jahren zuvor.

First Hitler-Platz, Now Hitlerberg, Google’s Parallel Universe Really Starting To Piss Germans Off

January 22, 2014 By Hermann Observer in Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hi-tech, History, Humor, Hurt Feelings Tags: German, Germans, Germany, Google Earth, Google Maps, Hitler, Hitlerberg, Humor, Nazis, Satire Leave a comment

The mountain of Heiglkopf near the German town of Wackersberg has not been referred to as Hitlerberg for more than 69 years. But an entry of Hitlerberg in Google Maps/Earth today will land you in Wackersberg nevertheless.

The fine people of Wackersberg are mad as hell about this and aren’t going to take it anymore (just like Berlin residents living near Theodore-Heuss-Platz maybe ought to be but could hardly care less). I don’t blame them, either. I think. Would you really want the one nutcase out there actually looking for a place called Hitlerberg to find out where you live?

Seit fast 69 Jahren heißt der Heiglkopf im Landkreis Bad Tölz schon nicht mehr Hitlerberg. Trotzdem reicht heute immer noch der Eintrag Hitlerberg in die Suchmaske bei Google-Maps und -Earth – und der Betrachter landet in Wackersberg.

American Archaeologist Adventurer Discovers Secret Nazi Treasure While Searching For Ark Of The Covenant

November 5, 2013 By Hermann Observer in High Art, Higher Education, History, Home Cooking Tags: Art, Degenerate Art, Humor, Indiana Jones, Kunst, Munich, Nazis, Satire 2 Comments

The art world was stunned yesterday by the discovery in Munich of 1,500 lost works of art by a lone wolf treasure hunting hardboiled detective American patriot archaeologist college professor on a quest, wearing a fedora and carrying a bullwhip.

The mysterious professor, Prof. Dr. Dr. Prof. I. Jones, refused to comment on the find other than to say that his discovery “raises fresh questions about the Nazis’ attitude to the modern art they loved to hate.”

Bei dem spektakulären Kunstfund in München sind 1285 ungerahmte und 121 gerahmte Bilder sichergestellt worden. Darunter befinden sich auch bisher unbekannte Meisterwerke wie ein Selbstbildnis von Dix.

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

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