We Need Professional Counseling

Not. Same old same old, if you ask me: Germans see ties worsening as Americans remain positive.

Pew

In the U.S., seven-in-ten say that relations with Germany are good, a sentiment that has not changed much in the past year. Germans, on the other hand, are much more negative: 73% say that relations with the U.S. are bad, a 17-percentage-point increase since 2017.

Americans want more cooperation with Germany, but Germans don’t reciprocate.

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No Nukes, No Coal, No Agribusiness…

No plastic, no non-refundable bottles and cans, no speeding

Agribusiness

No meat, no new economy, no tourism, no gentrification, no toxic masculinity, no defense spending, no borders? Hell no. But that’s just the tip of the German ICEBERG OF NO. Let’s call it the German NICEBERG. Germans think positive, you see, and want to move ahead, progressively, into the future. After all the no’s are said and done – and that might take some time yet, mind you – whatever’s left, well, that’s the brave new future.

Thousands of farmers from across Germany and their supporters protested at Berlin’s landmark Brandenburg Gate on Saturday, calling for climate-friendly agriculture and healthy food.

“We are fed up with the agricultural industry.”

BREAKING NEWS: Germans Are More Negative Than Americans

When it comes to German-American relations, I mean. Like holy Scheiße! Who would have ever expected that?

Germans

And here I thought Germans were such positive, can-do people who  have always been so, you know, upbeat and cheerful about German-American relations. In the past, I mean. Right? This just doesn’t make any sense. It’s just not their nature. Somebody should double-check these numbers.

6 charts on how Germans and Americans view one another

1. Americans think U.S.-German relations are in good shape, but Germans disagree.

2. German attitudes toward the U.S. have turned sharply negative in the Trump era.

3. Merkel gets positive reviews from Americans, especially Democrats.

4. Many Germans see the U.S. as a top foreign policy partner; fewer Americans feel the same way about Germany.

5. Democrats are more likely than Republicans to see Germany as an important partner for foreign policy.

6. There are transatlantic differences about defense spending.

Only 11% of Germans expressed confidence in Trump to do the right thing in world affairs in 2017, down from 86% for Obama in 2016.

Sensational Survey Shocker: Germans Pessimistic About The Future

Holy freakin’ Scheiße. Talk about coming out of left field.

Germans

A survey by the Allensbach Opinion Research Center has just discovered that Germans living in comfortable circumstances and aged between 39 and 59 are – now get this – really pessimistic about the future.

Boy oh boy do I ever hope that they (whoever they are) paid these opinion research center people one big pile of money because you can be absolutely certain that absolutely no one over here saw that one coming.*

Schwindender Optimismus, Sorge und Ängste trotz guter persönlicher Lebenslage und wirtschaftlicher Situation? Die Mehrheit der Deutschen zwischen 30 und 59 Jahren ist laut Analyse des Meinungsforschungsinstitutes Allensbach zwar materiell zufrieden, blickt dennoch eher pessimistisch in die Zukunft.

* I would have given them that data for half of whatever it was they paid them. I’m just sayin’.

Thriving, Struggling, Suffering

Although not necessarily in that order.

Germans are notorious pessimists, as you know. And they’re always bitching and moaning, especially when they don’t have anything to bitch and moan about. Take this latest Gallup survey, for instance:

“The 4 in 10 Germans who rated their lives highly enough to be considered “thriving” throughout 2011 was lower than in 2010.”

That could have been a whole lot worse, though. I’ve been living here so long that the first time I read that sentence I swear I was sure it read

“The 4 in 10 Germans who rated their lives highly enough to be considered “LIVING” throughout 2011 was lower than in 2010.”

Come on Germany, you’re giving me a complex. Go out there and live a little already!

In addition, the percentage of Germans who are “suffering” ticked up slightly in the fourth quarter of 2011, amid escalating economic turmoil in the eurozone.