“On The Run From The Henchmen Of His Homeland”

December 18, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Home Cooking, Hurt Feelings, Hypochondria, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Brazil, Edward Snowden, Espionage, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, NSA, Russia, Satire, Surveillance, Treason, Whistleblowing Leave a comment

Concerned Germans everywhere (note the red scarf) weren’t quite concerned enough to actually offer poor and misunderstood professional leaker/Russian tourist Edward Snowden political asylum, but now they all hope in unison that Brazil will (tons of Germans have found refuge there in the past, you know).

Otherwise those awful henchmen/bogeymen from that horrible homeland of his might just get him and, well, we don’t even want to THINK about what could possibly happen to him then!

Ex-NSA-Mitarbeiter Edward Snowden will auf seiner Flucht vor den Häschern seines Heimatlandes offenbar nach Brasilien weiterreisen.

Wow. A Clear Decision.

December 8, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Hideology, High Art, Higher Education, Hurt Feelings Tags: Berlin, Boycotts, German, Germans, Germany, Joachim Gauck, Presidents, Russia, Sochi Winter Olympics, Vladimir Putin Leave a comment

We don’t see many of those that often these days. Cool. Business not as usual, for once.

Human rights violations? Harrassment of the opposition? Let the Sochi Winter Games begin? Nein, danke! Not with me. Gauck. Finde ich gut.

Gauck, a former Lutheran pastor who played a key part in the East German protest movement before the fall of the Berlin Wall, has declined any official visits to Russia since coming to office in March 2012 and repeatedly criticised the country’s “deficit of rule of law” and “air of imperialism”.

What’s Wrong With This Picture?

July 3, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Edward Snowden, German, Germans, Germany, NSA, Russia, Spies 1 Comment

No, not that. Russian spies don’t have heads (here in Germany).

Wait a minute. I thought only Americans did all the spying around here these days.

Germany rejects Edward Snowden’s asylum request

Visit Germany!

July 2, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Higher Education, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Asylum, Berlin, Edward Snowden, Espionage, Extradition, German, Germans, Germany, Law, NSA, PRISM, Russia, Spying Leave a comment

If you dare. Then enjoy your short stay here before your extradition back home (home?) to the USA.

The Federal Republic of Germany can offer asylum to someone who is being politically persecuted, not to someone who is being sought for criminal offences.

And I if you want to try the refugee angle, Germans define refugees as being those who have a justified fear of being persecuted because of their race, religion, nationality, affiliation to a specific social group or political persuasion. So good luck with that, too.

Of course Germany could let you stay anyway. But that would be it then. With their pious preaching about the Rechtsstaat (rule of law) and how the NSA spy scandal demonstrates how the US does not respect it, I mean.

Ecuador und Island in Österreich, Bolivien, Brasilien, China, Kuba, Finnland, Frankreich, Deutschland, Indien, Italien, Irland, Niederlande, Nicaragua, Norwegen, Polen, Russland, Spanien, der Schweiz und Venezuela.

Die Linke hatte bereits in der vergangenen Woche die Bundesregierung dazu aufgefordert, Snowden Asyl zu gewähren. Am Montag hatten dies auch die Grünen in Spiel gebracht. Snowden solle in der EU oder sogar in Deutschland “sichere Unterkunft haben, denn er hat Europa einen Dienst erwiesen”, erklärte Fraktionschef Jürgen Trittin.

We Looted The Loot First

June 23, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, High Art, History, Home Cooking, Humor, Hypocrisy Tags: Art, Art Theft, Berlin, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Kunst, Loot, Moscow, Museums, Russia, Satire, World War II Leave a comment

The grand opening of a joint German-Russian art exhibition in St Petersburg was spoiled on Friday when Moscow objected to Angela Merkel’s plan to use her speech to refer to hundreds of looted German works of art looted by Red Army soldiers after the war.

The Germans claim that some 1 million looted objects are still missing, including the Treasure of Priamos, objects looted by the Germans in Troy under the direction of Heinrich Schliemann way back in 1873.

Moscow appears to be open to compromise, but only when the Russian artworks destroyed by German troops during World War II – estimated to be more than 110m books and publications following the plundering of 427 Soviet museums and 4,000 libraries – be returned, as well.

“This is a very touchy question for the societies of both countries. We need to look for solutions, rather than inflating the problem.”

German Government’s Concern About NGO Raids Has Russians Shaking In Their Fur-Lined Boots

March 27, 2013 By Hermann Observer in Habeas Corpus, Habitudes, Hard Facts, Helplessness, Hideology, Higher Education, Hurt Feelings, Hypocrisy, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Democracy, Dissidents, Freedom, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, NGOs, Russia, Satire, Spies Leave a comment

After German Foreign Minister Guido Westerwelle himself summoned a Russian envoy to “express the German government’s concern” about a series of raids on German NGOs in Russia, the envoy broke down in tears of regret, fell to his knees, grovelled around for a bit and then promised that his country would never ever ever do anything bad like that again.

The Russian offices of the Konrad-Adenauer-Stiftung and the Friedrich-Ebert-Stiftung have both come under intense scrutiny recently by Russian authorities seeking “foreign agents” who support domestic dissidents because, well, that’s what Russian authorities do. But all of this will come to a screeching halt now, I guess.

“Hampering the activity of German foundations could inflict lasting damage on bilateral relations.”

Gazprom Gerd Strikes Again

March 7, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy, Helections, Hypocrisy Tags: Berlin, Elections, Gas, Gazprom, Germans, Germany, Humor, Putin, Russia, Satire, Schroder 1 Comment

Former chancellor Gerhard Schroeder (SPD) is always good for popping a cork or two.

This time he’s ruffled a few German feathers by getting all warm and fuzzy about his good old buddy Vladimir Putin again. More specifically about Putin’s stunning (not) election victory over the weekend, praising him for being the “flawless democrat” that he is.

But this is nothing new. Schroeder has always been generous with praise for Putin. Especially since landing that 1 million euro-per-year consulting job from him at Gazprom’s Nord Stream consortium – just a few months (weeks?) after having left office.

It’s the gas, stupid.

Wes Brot ich ess, des Lied ich sing.

Let The Protests Begin

February 2, 2012 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Hate, Helplessness, Hi-tech, Hurt Feelings, Hysteria Tags: Berlin, Defense, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Iran, Military, Missle Shield, NATO, Ramstein, Russia, Satire, Technology 2 Comments

Now that the command center for NATO’s missile shield program will be based here in Germany, it’s time for the German Left (that’s the middle of the road here, by the way) to start telling us why this is an awful bad horrible idea.

My guess is that that we will find out that there are actually no such things as rogue states like Iran (only morally challenged ones), that a missle shield like this is absolutely positively technically impossible to implement, and that putting one into operation (even though it is absolutely positively technically impossible to implement) would hurt Russia’s feelings.

There’s not much happening on the Peace Front either these days, you see. And spring is just around the corner. And folks do get easily bored, you know?

The United States insists that the missile shield aims to counter missile threats from Iran, but Russia has voiced concerns that it would target its own strategic deterrent.

Let’s Deepen German-Russian Ties

July 16, 2011 By Hermann Observer in Habitudes, Heconomy Tags: Awards, Berlin, Economics, Freedom, German, Germans, Germany, Humor, Russia, Satire 7 Comments

And let’s do so by cancelling a German freedom prize that was to be awarded to Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin just days before German Chancellor Angela Merkel is to meet with Russian President Dmitry Medvedev to discuss reinforcing their countries’ growing economic and trade ties.

Whatever. But he’ll be heartbroken for sure.

The Quadriga award annually honors people who are “role models for and from Germany” and is “dedicated to all those whose courage tears down walls and whose commitment builds bridges.”

Observing Hermann

“Was interessiert mich mein Geschwätz von gestern?”

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